Time for Change
by Midnight-kisses507
Summary: Draco grew up in a world of pain, Hermione grew up abused and alone. Snape helps them both, as children and now in their finale year as head boy and girl. Both find comfort in cutting and as the story continues they find it in one another.Draco/Hermione please be aware that this story has some very dark themes, this story could be considered a trigger to those who are sensitive
1. Chapter 1

Draco had always been one to keep to himself. With a childhood, broken by a hateful abusive, murderous father, and loveless from a mother who never wanted to be in this world. Draco was raised by the Death Eaters and his deranged aunt, with the help of his godfather Snape. Who became is only saving grace. The only love Draco saw as a child came from that man, the man who on the outside was as cold as stone, but showing love for a child who knew nothing but hate helped them both.

Hogwarts stood cold, and strong in the night. As a blizzard pounded the castle with inches of snow an hour, all students were called to there common rooms and forbidden from roaming the castle after dark. The grounds were closed until further notice due to snow pilling up, and sheets of ice laying on every walk way.

Draco didn't care about the rules, he found no comfort being locked up inside for days on end. Not when he had to share the heads common room with her. She was always there, reading or doing homework. They did not talk unless it was asking the time or discussing head duty. Often Draco would leave the common room to go visit with his godfather.

"You really need to learn to trust her Draco, she knows more then you think about what you grew up with." Spoke Snape as Draco took a sip of tea in his private study.

"She grew up with parents who were around, perfect Sunday outings and now perfect bloody friends. I'm sure she knows what I deal with" he said with a sarcastic tone

Snape shook his head and sipped his tea "she is not good at blocking her thoughts, I've seen it son, she's not happy. and with Christmas break coming in a few days I'm afraid for her." Snape said finishing his tea. A moment went by before Draco spoke up again

"What happens at home that would have you scared for her, she's worthless father, dirty.."

Snape cut him off " anyone who has been through what she has, is not a mudblood. She …Draco, she needs to stay here for the break. I think its time for things to start being different, something needs to change for both of you. And I think its time I told you." Draco stood back and listened to his godfather tell him horrible things that he never thought could happen to someone who is always smiling.

Hermione grew-up much the same to Draco, yet no one knew that side of her not even Ron and Harry. Her parents were never around, owning a business took too much time, so young Hermione was with her nanny all the time. When her parents were home, her mother would go out with friends all night leaving a chore list for Hermione. Even at the age of 5 she had hours of chores to be done. If they were not completed she would be beaten with a leather belt.

Her father however loved Hermione. But his love was not the kind that was wanted or appropriate for a father and daughter. It had started when she turned 7, with her mother gone, her father needed to get Hermione into the bath. It started with touching and kisses. But when she started to cry it soon turned into more beating. Hermione was scared to talk about it, her father threatened to kill her if she said a word to anyone. So every night as her mother left the house to go away from the person who needed her most, her father would do things to her that a father should never do.

It continued for four years. But when Hermione turned 11, everything changed. Her world of pain and abuse was not where she belonged. She found out she was a witch, and was going away from her living hell.

"What the fuck is this?" asked her father as he threw the letter onto the floor by her bed

" I got it today daddy, it's a letter to a special school" she spoke shaking, and near to tears " its for…for…witches."

She didn't hear him say a word; instead his hand met her face and sent her over the edge of the bed, knocking her against the wall, a gash opening up above her eyebrow. "I knew you were a fucked up freak, but I didn't know how screwed up you really are, you cant possibly be my child"

"Daddy I am leaving this place. They sent this to me, they can take me away." She said with blood running down her face mixing with tears and her father, again, had his way.

The sun came up on a beautiful morning. The summer was over and the students were all excited to be going to Hogwarts for the first time. However, Hermione was locked in her room, unable to leave, unable to go to the school where he couldn't touch her. The clock down the hall made its chime on the hour,8am. Then a popping sound came from the living room. Hermione heard a voice she didn't know, but her father was screaming at this man.

"She's mine, I don't have to let her go to a freak school, you can't just take her!" he said yelling

"I will not take her against her will, however in our world we ask our children what they want before we force them into doing things." This man knew? Thought Hermione…but how?

There was a flash of light and then she heard the key in the door. "Miss Granger? Are you here?" spoke the man, dresses in a long black robe.

"i..Im here" she said, but only a whisper. She was curled next to her bed, in a small ball, with the same shirt from the night before, still caked with blood.

"My name is professor Snape, I'm from your new school. The headmaster didn't get an owl back saying yes or not to your attendance to our school, he wanted me to check on you, we try to contact all muggle-borns but it seems that you were over looked, I am sorry it took me so long.''Snape looked at her again, and took out his wand " I am not going to hurt you, I promise, I would like to clean up your forehead, if you would like?" he asked, she nodded yes and he muttered the spell, cleaning the blood away and healing the cut, a thin line was all that was left.

Hermione didn't know what to say, she started to cry, not because she was scared, but b/c she was saved. She did the only think she could think to do; she got up and hugged this stranger, "so I take that as you want to go to school?"

"yes sir, please…I ..I don't want to live here anymore." She said. With that, Snape grabbed her shoulder lightly and when she blinked they were in a street somewhere she had never been.

"sir are they..?"

"Other witches and wizards? Yes, welcome to Diagon Ally. Here we need to buy your books, robes, and I think it is time to get you a wand." Hermione smiled for the first time in his presence. She breathed in the smells and heard the sounds of the people around her. And as if being gone for along time, she sighed with relief and felt home.


	2. Chapter 2

{A-N: i would like to remind my readers that although this story is my own, i do not own the charecters or the world, those belong to the lovely J..

I would also like to thank my readers, i didnt know if anyone would be interested in this type of story, the way that i am. i will be going back to school in a week, which will limit my fanfiction time. however i have alot already written, so i will update about once a week or so. if i am behind a couple weeks please bare with are much loved

your humble servent of the pen,

Midnight-Kisses507}

The sun came up on a beautiful morning. The summer was over and the students were all excited to be going to Hogwarts for the first time. However, Hermione was locked in her room, unable to leave, unable to go to the school where he couldn't touch her. The clock down the hall made its chime on the hour,8am. Then a popping sound came from the living room. Hermione heard a voice she didn't know, but her father was screaming at this man.

"She's mine, I don't have to let her go to a freak school, you can't just take her!" he said yelling

"I will not take her against her will, however in our world we ask our children what they want before we force them into doing things." This man knew? Thought Hermione…but how?

There was a flash of light and then she heard the key in the door. "Miss Granger? Are you here?" spoke the man, dresses in a long black robe.

"i..Im here" she said, but only a whisper. She was curled next to her bed, in a small ball, with the same shirt from the night before, still caked with blood.

"My name is professor Snape, I'm from your new school. The headmaster didn't get an owl back saying yes or not to your attendance to our school, he wanted me to check on you, we try to contact all muggle-borns but it seems that you were over looked, I am sorry it took me so long.''Snape looked at her again, and took out his wand " I am not going to hurt you, I promise, I would like to clean up your forehead, if you would like?" he asked, she nodded yes and he muttered the spell, cleaning the blood away and healing the cut, a thin line was all that was left.

Hermione didn't know what to say, she started to cry, not because she was scared, but b/c she was saved. She did the only think she could think to do; she got up and hugged this stranger, "so I take that as you want to go to school?"

"yes sir, please…I ..I don't want to live here anymore." She said. With that, Snape grabbed her shoulder lightly and when she blinked they were in a street somewhere she had never been.

"sir are they..?"

"Other witches and wizards? Yes, welcome to Diagon Ally. Here we need to buy your books, robes, and I think it is time to get you a wand." Hermione smiled for the first time in his presence. She breathed in the smells and heard the sounds of the people around her. And as if being gone for along time, she sighed with relief and felt home.

"She writes me a letter, every September, at the beginning of the term, telling me how things are at home, how things get better when he goes the Weasley's. and I give her the same book list I give you. Cant be blamed for favoritism if I'm giving the list to more then one student." He looked up at draco. " I used to get the same type of letter from Lily. Even after Hogwarts. I have pictures of her and James. I wished that it was I and not him in the pictures. When the Dark lord us of his plan, I went to Dumbledore, but you know that story already. Hermione is special. Don't loose her son"

Draco had never known that Snape had collected Hermione from her muggle home. "What caused her cut father?"

Snape shook his head "you already know the answer son, who caused your scar on your neck? Hers did that, and your own did that to you"

"she's of age in this world, does she have to go back to him?" asked Draco, who to his own surprise was starting to worry about Hermione.

" I've been keeping an eye on her father, he hasn't stopped. When she leaves for holiday, its hell. She's found some safety by going with Mr. Weasley for some of the holiday, but it is my belief that her father has demanded her return, and her fear prevents her from staying away," he spoke slowly and with a heavy heart, and he placed another log into the fire place. " Draco she's no different from you, I taught you not to discriminate muggle-borns, you have a chance at what I didn't. You know I fell in love with Lily, I still love her, and I care for harry as much as a man in my position could. You deserve to be happy. To stop hurting. I know its hard you've told me a thousand times, after every time you ask me to heal your arms, if you ask me. But I don't ask you to stop. I want you to but you have to want to."

Draco set his cup onto the coffee table, and turned to his godfather "I should go, its getting late, we have rounds to do before turning in for the night. Ill try father, but ive acted as if I hated her for 6 years, how is she going to believe me now?"

"She has a kind heart and needs you as much as you need her. Believe me son, if you open up she will as well, you're good for one another. You both deserve some happiness, go on, don't keep her waiting."

As Draco walked out of the dungeon study, and up to the great hall he thought about what his godfather had just told him. It was strange to think of Hermione as anything but strong, confident and brave. Yet here he was feeling as sorry for her as he often felt for himself. All of this was far too much for Draco to handle at the moment, he needed to make It go away. As he approached the great hall he ducked into the boys loo. Going into the end stall, Draco opened his bag and pulled out a small silver cigarette style case. Inside was packed with salt and the salt housed a sleek silver blade. Draco, setting the toilet seat down, pulled out a roll of gauze and a cotton pad. One thing Draco knew was muggle first aid, a skill that is fast learned when magic healing if forbidden. He drew in a breath, placing the silver edge of the blade against his icy pale skin, pressing the blade in he moved it fast and hard. With in a moment he felt the flood of release and the familiar sting that he was looking for. Making quick work out of it, he cleaned up the blood and wrapped his arm. Pulling down his sleeve he left the bathroom, on to head duty.

Hermione had gone threw the day as normal. As she waited for Draco, who was late again she reflected on her actions from the day, grabbing her arm as she sat down on a bench.

Waking up from her nightly nightmares of what awaited her at home the memories were too strong. Going into her shared bathroom each morning, Hermione would do the only thing that made the pain of her father go away; the pain she could control. She kept her blades and first aid kit in her locked cabinet. Looking at her face in the mirror, Hermione took out her small wooden box where her cutting tools were kept. She took great care in cleaning the blade before and after using it. But once the mark was made, she liked to feel the blood flow out from her body and run down her arm into the sink. This morning it took more then 4 deep long cuts to make the nightmare go away. She sighed dropped the blade on the sink.

"Granger do you always have to make so much fucking noise this early? And could you hurry up some people get use out of making them self look good." Said Draco from his door, that was locked.

Hermione snapped out of her daze "ill be done in a moment, sorry Draco…um… don't come in" she said, as she started to wrap up her arm.

"I don't have all morning you have 45 seconds then ill unlock the door myself, and you best have clothes on, I enjoy having my eye site."

"Hold on!" she did not need this today, not from him. She looked back at the sink, which had drops of her blood all over it. She quickly finished wrapping her arm, and packed her kit, just as Draco used his wand to unlock the door. She turned on the water, as Draco came into the small room.

"What is taking you so..." he stopped midsentence. Noticing the blood, he looked at her open cuff, noticing the slightly bulged area…."she didn't" he thought

"I had a nose bleed, again, sorry, this weather isn't good for me." She said as the water finished washing away the evidence of what she had done. "Bathrooms all yours, see you tonight for rounds"

"Granger, that's the fifth nosebleed this week, you should get that looked at" she said as she shut the door.

She went into her room to finish getting her robes on before class. After the close call this morning with Draco, she decided that cutting would only happen in her room from now on, he wouldn't need to go into her room, shed be safe to do it there.

Classes went by with nothing out of the ordinary. Although this entire year Snape had seemed kinder, he was still an angry greasy git. But he didn't pick on the Gryffindor as much as he had in the past.

Hermione remembered that when she came to school, Snape asked her not to talk to him as if he was a friend, during school time he was teacher and needed to be treated that way. Every year at the beginning of term she would write him a letter, telling him that her summer was not pleasant but she was thankful to be back to a place that she called home and it was all thanks to him. He would respond by giving her a list of books and potions that would be going over in the first few weeks of class. Snape knew that if she had extra time to research the work, Draco wouldn't be the only one who knew the work ahead of time either. Snape's return letter with the book included a picture of Lily Potter. She was around hermiones age, and was sitting under a cherry blossom tree. In snape's writing on the back it said " too many wonderful witches die before they need to, please be strong, my flower was taken from me, and I care for you as I did for her. Remember she died for love, and you must live so that you have a chance to love and be loved in return." She cryed when she read those words. How did he know? She had thought of ending things many times over this past summer. And his letter made those thoughts seem like horrible actions. But who could ever love me? She thought, im broken, used, damaged. There cant be anyone in this world, or the muggle that would want me. She looked up from her thoughts when she heard his foot steps.

"sorry im late Hermione, I was talking to Snape and I couldn't leave" said draco as he walked up to her standing just inside the great hall.

"I haven't been waiting long, but at least you weren't playing quidditch this time, start from the top and work our way down today?" Hermione asks and she gently picked up her bag and they started walking to the main staircase.

" that works, by the time we hit the Ravenclaw common room it will be curfew, after that well have to issue punishments those are always fun" Draco knew if he kept being civil that maybe he could gain her trust.

"Do you think the snow will stop anytime soon?" Draco asked as they went walking up the stairs. He tried to give a soft smile, but she wasn't looking. She thought a moment and that worry line that she always got crossed her forehead.

"are we really going to talk about the weather Draco? I mean, you don't even like being around me, let alone holding a conversation with me" she said matter of factly

"that's not true, I don't hate you. Times change….people change." He sad softly

" not the people I know, no matter how much I want him to.' She said, and that was that, she didn't speak again for some time.

The round went well, not too many students out of bed after hours. The astronomy tower was flooded with snow, so no students were hiding there. Harry was just about to enter the Gryffindor common room when Draco and Hermione passed him

"Evening Hermione, hello malfoy"

"Hey Scarhead," he turned to Hermione," we are done Hermione, goodnight, see you in the common room" said draco "want me to bring you sack back?, Im heading there anyway" he asked

"umm.. sure, just leave it on my red leather arm chair…thanks" she said as he walked away.

" what the hell was that?" asked Harry

" I have no idea what your implying Harry, he started to be more civil after dinner, maybe someone slipped him a potion or something" she said "i don't know harry. But I don't mind it." Hermione didn't want to admit it, not to harry but she had always imagined liking Draco.

" well ill see if I can find out if he is up to something, last thing I need is for you to get hurt," he hugged her " your like a sister to me, I cant even think of what I would do if I found out something had happened to you" as harry said this Hermione felt a knot in the pit of her stomach, she couldn't tell him, he wouldn't understand. She kisses his cheek, like she always did and placed a hand on his shoulder " you are my big brother harry, but im fine, you don't need to worry about me." She tried to give a fake smile, but didn't know if it would work

"well I worry about you for normal reasons, but its Ginny, shes worried about you, she talked to me about it the other night" he took her hand, and went to push up her sweater cuff, but Hermione recoiled and pulled back her sleeve

"harry don't, im fine, please, if there was something wrong you'd all know, its late harry, I need to finish some homework, see you at breakfast" she turned to leave, but harry didn't move

" Hermione, im here for you to talk to, and if not me there is Ginny. Im not stupid, I think I know that your doing. I know the signs. Just, don't do anything drastic, talk to someone…anyone." He stepped closer to her " I have lost too many people in my life to lose you too."

"Harry, your worrying over something that isn't real, I need to go, goodnight" she said as she walked away, she heard harry said under his breath "this isn't over"


	3. Chapter 3

She walked into the common room ready to cry, but she couldn't, not if Draco would be there too. She looked at the couches, but Draco wasn't there. He must heave gone to bed already she thought. She saw her bag on her arm chair, untouched. She sat on the floor in front of the couch, there alone, she started to feel dirty. This is how shed feel after her father would leave her room at night. Harry was questioning her and he almost found out about her cutting. Everything was too much, Hermione decided to curl up in front of the fire, watching the flames dance as she felt her head spinning. As she was drifting to sleep she heard the bathroom door open.

Draco had just come out of a shower. He was wearing jeans and a belt, but his shirt was still on his shoulder. As he walked into the room he saw her, she was asleep near the fire. She looked at peace, unlike how she looked in class. Her arm was under her head like a pillow, and that's when Draco saw it. A thin line of gauze peaked out from her sleeve, it was caked with blood. "Hermione" he whispered. "whats happened to you" Draco knew that he had fallen for this girl. This girl who was broken, just as he was, who was damaged just like he was, and this girl who was hurting just like he was. And he hoped that one day she could love him the way he did.

Draco knelt down next to her, and brushed a piece of hair behind her ear. As his hand brushed her ear, she stirred awake. " im sorry that I woke you." Draco whispered.

"I didn't mean to fall asleep, but everything today has just been too much." She said as she sat up. " A nap was better then what I wanted to do…I wanted to cut, but if I did I didn't think I could stop." She turned to Draco, and hugged him, as she breathed in she smelled his body wash, a musky yet flowery sent that matched his personality.

"what's wrong with today? Come sit and lets talk." He said pulling her up onto the couch. She sat on one side, curled into the arm hugging a pillow. He sat on the opposite side, relaxed, and still in just his jeans and shirt. His skin pale and clean, prickled by the cool winter air. His arms were bandaged, his cuts lying raw and some re-opened by the shower, stinging the gauze with crimson lines. His arms held many scars, from shoulder to elbow. Some, Hermione saw, were from cutting, others were from dark magic, like the scar that ran along his neck like a spider web.

"What do you want to talk about Draco. I'm not good at this … I don't normally talk about this." She was scared, they knew what each other was doing, they knew why. But they didn't know how bad the other had it. Nothing compared to the pain each one suffered individually. But together maybe they could help stop it from getting worse.

"I want to start out by saying how sorry I am, and please believe me." He said, "For years I have been horrible to you, causing you unnecessary pain and torment, when you had your own hell to deal with. I thought I had it bad, I thought I was fucked up. You are always smiling and laughing, and living your life. I hated you for that."

"So Severus told you? I don't blame him; he's told me little details about your childhood. But just to justify that he understood what was wrong with me. I wanted to talk to you, but… talking isn't easy for me. Harry and Ron, and Ginny even they have no idea about what was going on. Harry and Ginny are suspecting something; he tried to check my arms before." She said holding her wrist.

"Father does that, check my arms, every few weeks. If I haven't had my sleeves rolled up for a while or if I don't have my mind blocked. I call Snape my father because he is the only parent I have really known. My parents aren't my parents, they only created me. The only good they ever did. My neck " he said laying his hand over his scar, " I was 10, and was playing with the house elves, I was on my practice broom, and knocked one over. Winkie her name was, I hopped off my broom and helped her up, saying I was sorry. Father watched the whole thing and came out side. He took out his wand, and killed winkie, saying that she was bewitching me into freeing her. Then he pulled it on me, he dug the tip into my throat. Yelling about what a horrible son I make, how I should have never been born, that I couldn't possibly be a Malfoy and how I was never to talk to an elf again unless someone else was in the room. He didn't even heal the mark, I bled for hours, until I used enough toilet paper to make it stop." He stopped and took his hand away, " it still hurts sometimes, when he's mad, it has traces of his magic in it. I figured that out after some time." Draco looked sad, but also happy " it hasn't hurt in about 6 months. I think He might be dead. one could only hope"

"I have too many scars to remember how they all happened. I know each one that I made though. I look at my scars, and the cuts that will become more scars, and I see how strong I am" Hermione was quiet for a moment, seeing that Draco looked a little confused

"Scars are stronger then the skin that was there before. Its been scientifically proven in the muggle world. I see it as, I have control over the weaker self. The self that cant control it. The one that gets hit, and… the one that he…does things to. I know I shouldn't do it. But….it" she was cut off by Draco finishing her sentence.

"it helps…I know. I do it too remember?" he smiled, and took her hand. He went to pull up her sleeve, but she whispered "please don't." he could see that she was scared. " im not going to hurt you Hermione"

"please say it again. I know you said it before….but I like how it sounds when you say it"

"I'm not going to hurt you." He said slowly

"no, when you said my name" she said, a tear forming in the corner of her eye

" I am never, ever going to hurt you, Hermione" he said her name slow, and strong, as the tear fell down her face. He rose his hand slowly, too fast would scare her, and with one finger he wiped it way. " I enjoy saying your name, and I love how it sounds when you say mine. You say it with love, with care… I don't normally hear my name like that." He said " I'm sure your not used to it either."

She didn't answer, but shook her head yes. She unfolded her legs and sat back into the couch. Draco, putting on his tee shirt, moved closer to her. " why are you being so nice? All of a sudden. I don't mind it, but… its kinda scary for me Draco…you know how easily I could get hurt.. I don't want to fall for someone if it's a trick"

" Father talked to me tonight, he wanted me to stop pretending to be like my creator. He raised me to love, and not judge, but I had to live up to the Malfoy name." he slid off the couch and onto the floor in front of her, he took her hand gently " he told me it was time to change, to be the real me. I know its hard, especially after all that I have put you through, but what you make me feel is real…I don't want to hide that feeling anymore. I look at you, sad and broken, but so together on the outside, and I want to make every corner of your life happy." Draco looked into her eyes, but was unable to read her face, just then the clock on the wall chimed the hour, 1am.

"I don't know if I can feel happy Draco, but I feel something for you. Id like to try to be happy. But with break in a few days, what ever happy I feel will be beaten out of me, and we'll have to work at it again if I come back" Hermione said keeping the eye contact with Draco.

"What do you mean if? Your not plan…" Draco was cut off by Hermione placing her other hand over his mouth.

" no, im not, but I don't know how much trouble ill be in when I go home, I left with out telling him and I haven't responded to 3 of his letters. I wish I didn't have to go there. But the Weasley's are going to visit Bill and his wife in France. Harry is going to be alone at his god-fathers old house that he was given and I don't feel right asking to go there. He'd start asking questions. I could stay here, but my father might be able to find me. I don't know if that's possible. But I know I'm afraid. I'm so tired of being afraid." She said and stood up "it's late, we should get to bed."

" you say that as if you'd rather not go to sleep….nightmares?" said draco, turning off the light next to the couch, as Hermione picked up her bag.

"How did you know?" she asked

"I get them too. So tell me this, do you really get nose bleeds? Or.." she cut him off

"So you've noticed… I do get them…but not as often as I do other things. Im not going to promise you that ill stop" she said mater of factly.

"And im not asking you to stop, if you don't ask me to. but I would rather you come to me, and if I could ill come to you. But we will eventually have to talk to Severus." He said leaning against the door frame to his room, as she did the same to her own.

"That might work, if we try to talk to one another instead of cutting. maybe we can learn to not do it…over time. What time do you go to breakfast?" she asked, changing the subject

"if I eat it, I go at 7, not a lot of people so I don't have to pretend as much. How about you? I never see you in the great hall anymore." Draco was falling for her, and it only took one night. This was good, but he didn't know how to handle it, but one thing was in his mind, no matter how much this feeling inside of him weighed on his mind, he didn't feel the need to cut.

" I don't really eat much lately. I haven't been hungry, Harry makes me eat dinner. But most nights it makes me sick. Then I feel bad for getting sick and I cut. It's a horrible way to live… but I cant help that I don't want to eat." As she finished her sentence, Draco noticed that she had lost a lot of weight. She was never big, but her uniform used to be filled out more. Now it looked three sizes too big. Her face was thin, and weak. Her eyes always held black circles. And the scar above her eye brow was the only color on her face.

" Come eat breakfast with me in the morning. Nothing big, but I think if we are going to make this" he said grabbing her hand " you and I work, we need to get better. I think, that its time this world had more love. And its going to be hard for me. But I feel love for you, if that is the feeling that im feeling right now." Draco leaned over and kissed her hand.

" I don't know if im worth it, I don't know if I can feel love. But I feel safe with you, and that is close enough to love for now. I don't know it the whole school is ready to see you and I getting along. We might need to start slow. Breakfast tomorrow sounds good. But please…if I don't eat much don't make a big deal out of it."

"I promise" he said

" good night Draco, sleep well" she said, kissing his cheek

"good night, Hermione, if your dreams start to get too bad, and you cant sleep, come into my room. When I was little, father would let me sleep next to him and it made those memories and nightmares go away. I know its fast, but I will never hurt you. But its up to you. I will never do something with out asking you first. "

"you wont be mad if im not ready to do that yet?"

" no, but when you are ready I'll be there" he said "Hermione, may I kiss you good night?"

She thought a moment, feeling scared. But then looked into his eyes. He was safe, he was warm. He said her name. " yes, Draco" and with that he kissed her lightly on her lips. She was cold. But kissed back gently. Both of them felt a spark. And turned, opening their doors and went off to bed.


	4. Chapter 4

Draco, walking into his room. Looked into his dressing table mirror. He, himself was thin, but not frail the way Hermione looked. He took off his sweater, and looked at his chest and neck. He saw his bandages on his arms, crusted with crimson. " you are stronger then this. She needs you. You have someone to live." He said to his own reflection. He took off his jeans, and pulled on his pj bottoms. Now that he had her, he needed to convince her not to go back home. With thoughts of his life, and of the conversation that he had just had, he drifted to sleep thinking of her.

Hermione walked into her room. And looked the photos on the dresser. All of them of her and her friends. She saw her smile seem to fade as she got older. The most recent photo from this past summers trip at the Burrow was horrible. They were playing outside, the boys were on brooms, playing one a side Quidditch, and Ginny and Hermione were on the grass. Ginny was eating a sandwich and Hermione hadn't touched hers.

As so looked at the photo she noticed her stomach was aching for food, as her tummy growled she remembered when she first stopped eating.

It was a Friday night, the middle of July. Hermione had been out side all day, mowing the grass, and fixing the broken fence. She had put dinner in a slow cooker so she could focus on her chore list all day, and not get anyone mad. As she heard her fathers car pull into the drive way she kept working, no wanting to face him yet today. She turned back to the garden, pulling weed after weed.

"Hey, what is this mess in the kitchen? Are you trying to get me mad?" Hermione heard her father call from the back porch. "get in here now, and explain what is going on"

"coming dad" was all she said, putting down her trowel and pick. Walking into the kitchen from the back yard, Hermione didn't see a huge mess. The slow cooker sat, bubbleing on the counter. A little puddle of juice from roast bubbled over the side and under the lid causing the counter under the cooker to be wet and smell of meat and spices.

'dad, im sorry, I wanted to do that garden work today, I must have put too much stock in with the roast. Ill clean it up, Sir." She said going to grab the dish rag that hung on a hook in the sink.

" I don't think you understand, I ask you to keep this house clean, and I expect you to have supper ready for me when I get home, I should not have to remind you a hundred times to clean up after you. You are an ungrateful, fat, whore. You can forget going to that red-headed kids house, your mine all summer." He said looking at her with a lustful eye.

"dad I have to go to Ronald's house, his sister and I have homework to finish and Harry will be there, unless its ok for him to visit here. We have the guest room and…"

Hermione was cut off my her father

" you are not having any of those people in my house, those freaks that you're a part of. I wont stand for it." He took a step toward her, and placed a hand on her shoulder " besides we wouldn't want anyone to find out about how much I love you." He finished, kissing her neck.

"no we wouldn't want that" Hermione said, the words barely audible

"What did you say" her father said, grabbing her by her shoulders and spinning her around

"Nothing father, I should try to finish cleaning my mess. And I still need to finish the garden out back." She finished speaking, but never looked up at him.

"fine, but don't bother coming inside for dinner." He said, turning to the counter, and picking up the slow cooker "I wouldn't eat this garbage if you forced me to do it with magic. Which I know you cant, and why would you hurt me like that, you love me, don't you?" he asked, still holding the pot of hot liquid and roast.

"I love you daddy" she said quietly.

He slapped her with his free hand "I didn't hear you, say it louder!" he yelled

"I Love You, daddy" she said, louder then the first time.

" I don't believe you" she closed her eyes expecting to be slapped again, instead he took the pot in both hands, and flicked the hot liquid all over Hermione, throwing the pot on the floor on her feet when the liquid was drained from the pot. "clean that up too, and get out of my house." He said, slapping her once more before leaving the house.

Hermione was of age in the wizarding world, and could in fact do magic at home if she needed to. This was one of those moments. She opened her eyes, and moved slowly. The pain from the hot liquid burning her skin made it hard to move. Pulling out her wand, from a hidden pocket in her jeans, she cleaned the floor and herself off. She healed herself enough to be able to move freely. Hermione went to the phone and dialed a number

"Hello, This is Molly, how can I help you?" spoke the voice on the other end

" Mrs. Weasley?" Hermione said, trying not to cry

" Oh, Hermione its you child, it is so nice to hear from you, why are you using this muggle thing, why not flow or apperate? " molly was confused, but knew Hermione was hiding something.

"I know I said I wouldn't be able to spend holiday with you and Ron, and Ginny, but my parents wanted to go away for the remaining time, and I was…" she was interrupted

"Ginny would be so happy to see you, she has been dying to use this thing to call you, of course you can come, love. It is always a pleasure to have you here. Do you want me to come help get your school things?" Molly was very happy to get Hermione in the house, she wasn't looking well.

" No, thank you. I can make it. Is tonight a problem? Im almost done packing, and id like to not travel at night." Hermione looked out the window, her fathers car was gone.

"oh of course deary, any time, any time." She said " so see you tonight, should I plan for you for dinner?" asked molly

Hermione looked around at where the mess from the meal she had made one was, and she felt what wasn't fully healed from the burn " No Mrs. Weasly my dad is taking me out to eat since he wont be seeing me until Christmas, I've got to go, but ill see you tonight. Good bye "

"take care, see you soon love" click

Hermione knew that she didn't have a lot of time, she ran up the stairs and magicly locked her door behind her. With no owl, and Ginny looking over her Cat, all of her school things had already been packed and shrunk to fit in a back pack. She finished shrinking the last of her things, and stepped into the hall way, locking her door behind her. A car was pulling into the drive way, its lights reflecting from class and mirror all over the house. 'time to go' Hermione thought, and apperated to the burrow.

Mrs. Weasly didn't like how Hermione didn't seem to be eating any meals. But she asked Ginny about it, and Ginny said she was imagining it, that if Hermione was in trouble she would know, being her best friend.

Hermione looked into the mirror "Ginny, I cant tell you, youd be too sad"she said to no one. "time to try to sleep, although I know little good comes of that"


	5. Chapter 5

She woke in the morning, from the same set of nightmares, but instead of going into the bathroom to cut, she went into Draco's room. He was in the shower. But the fact that she could curl up in his bed, safe, made her feel better.

"You know when I said come into my room when your dreams got too bad, I meant when I was in my bed, but I don't mind seeing you here. Want to talk about it?" Draco asked, his hair dripping wet, and only in a towel.

" No, I'm ok, I'm just used to cutting every morning it would seem, and I figured it's a start, I have to start somewhere. Right?" Hermione looked at Draco, his pale skin, and dripping wet hair "you're beautiful you know? Like a work of art"

"No one has ever told me that. Until now." He leaned over and kisses her forehead "go back to sleep I'm going to get dressed and I need to see Father."

Draco quickly got his uniform on, and made his way down to the dungeon office of his godfather. It didn't take him long to get down there from the heads dorm. Draco knew all of the secret passages and being that it was only 6am, there was not a lot of activity in the castle. He knocked on the door, and heard Snape say enter from behind his desk.

"Draco, what's wrong? Its extremely early.. what do you .." Snape got up, standing just in front of Draco.

"Father, good morning to you too. I'm fine, by the way. I just came to talk. To tell you the good news." Draco sat down in his normal spot in front of the fire. He motioned for his father to sit opposite him saying "you were right." Was all he said before Snape spoke up

" It only took you one night to fall in love with her? Draco are you out of your mind? You don't just jump into something like this, she's delicate, she needs time, you didn't do anything last night did you?" Snape was fuming, not understanding what Draco was thinking.

"I didn't do anything but talk to her. I told her I wanted a truce. That I was tired of pretending to be something I wasn't. and she is tired of hurting. I showed her my cuts and scars" Draco paused a moment but started to speak again when he noticed Snape about to talk "I do love her. I feel this need to protect her, to keep anything from happening to her." Draco looked at his father, who was in shock.

" Draco, son, don't think too fast that lust is love. Your blocking me form seeing into your mind, you slept with her, I bet she's in your bed right now. Draco she could kill her self over this type of thing. Don't you get it? She's not as strong as she pretends to be."

"Are you done? No, I didn't sleep with her. I might have dreamt about it, even before last night. But I told her that I wouldn't do anything to her with out her asking, or giving me permission to. I ask every time I kiss her unless I can tell she's not going to retreat from it." Said Draco, then her stood up " but yes she is in my bed right now, because she cant stand the nightmares from that monster of a father she has. She came into my room while I was in the shower, and curled into my bed. And I could tell she was relaxed, she fell asleep and she smiled." Draco was staring into the fire, looking at the crimson flames dance and lap about.

"I'm going to need to talk to the both of you, and are you ready for what the rest of the school has to say…" Snape took a moment and stepped closer to Draco, placing a fatherly hand upon his shoulder "your father may still be at large. If you and Hermione want a life together, he needs to be found. Or he might try something horrible."

Draco brushed Snapes hand away. "I believe that he is dead, and we talked about the matter of public displays. Her and I are the heads, it is likely that we will have to spend time together. It is also possible that with this time we could be come friends, interhouse unity and such. Father, please" Draco said looking him in the eyes "if you don't trust my judgment trust hers. She's calling all the shots right now."

Snape smiled, and hugged the boy. And whispered while he was leaving the room " at least one person will get their happy ending."

As Draco climbed the stairs back up to the heads common room, he heard a set of foot steps behind him. Out of no where a furry of red hair he found himself shoved into an unused classroom

"what the hell?" said Draco

"Quiet ferret boy, I have something to say to you" Ginny Weasely stood in front of him, her hair in a slight messy ponytail and her uniform wrinkled.

"you know, you could have asked nicely, unlike your idiot of a brother, I have little issues concerning you.' Said Draco as he sat on an empty desk.

" I know my best friend, and I know something's wrong. You live with her, sharing a common room. I didn't come here to fight. I came here to ask if you've noticed or seen anything…out of sorts with Hermione." Said Ginny, now looking as if she was going to cry. Draco was good at handling girls crying, but not like this….not when he knew the truth but couldn't share it.

"I have noticed a few things, and Ginny, you can be sure that they are being taken care of and addressed. It is my belief that a lot of things with Hermione will be revealed in the next few days" said Draco smiling.

"you should run for minister of magic, that was a very politically correct thing to say. But what's wrong with her?" Ginny was not about to back down, not with what harry had told her about the night before.

"I am not the one that needs to tell you. Hermione is a remarkable person. And all that I can tell you is from now on, things are starting to change." Draco slid off of the desk and onto the floor, looking at his watch almost time to eat breakfast.

"look, I know you hate me but im going to make everything up to everyone. For all the wrong I've done. I know you don't believe me but look, Hermione and I had a talk last night and we called a truce. I'm done being the ass that people wanted me to me. Don't tell anyone. But please, just keep an open mind." Said Draco walking to the door.

"I hope your right Draco" said Ginny watching as he walked away.

Draco walked into his room, and saw his bed fully made and is room cleaned. "Hermione" he said out loud but to himself.

"is something wrong Draco?" asked Hermione as she stepped out of the bathroom, her hair neatly dried, and her uniform fitting more snugly.

"no, but why is my room clean? I didn't ask any house elf to do that today" Draco said looking directly at Hermione when he mentioned house-elf.

"..i didn't know you didn't want me to… I wanted to surprise you." Saying as she walked closer to him.

"well I was surprised, and thank you, just because you were in my bed, or room doesn't mean you need to clean it. But I understand why," Draco out reached his hand for hers, she grabbed it, and curled into him.

"your hair smells good." Draco said, laughing slightly. "lets go to breakfast, I could hear your tummy from that bathroom"

"your not making me eat are you?" she asked him

" no, but id like you to. However. When you eat it has to be a balanced meal like one of those pyramid plans. All food groups, and yes I know them too. Don't look so shocked" Draco said smirking.

After a moment the two let each other go. Hermione walked back into her room to grab her back pack, and Draco went to sit by the fire, waiting for her.

"so should I meet you down there, or are we walking together?" asked Draco as Hermione closed her bedroom door.

"I think we are safe to walk together, its still early. I know that Ron, Harry and Ginny aren't normally up yet." Draco looked over at her with a smile

"I wouldn't say that about Miss Weasley, I saw her this morning. After she cornered me. You need to talk to her she cares for you, and I know your concern for her is like that of a sister I could imagine." Said Draco, as they went out of the heads common room and into the hallway.

'your assumption of my feelings for her are correct, I do see her as a sister, which is why I cant tell her, I don't want her to feel my pain. I don't want anyone to have to deal with what I have to deal with." Hermione knew that Ginny would be more then willing to help, but by accepting the help, meant that she would be dealing with the problem.

"But you let me in?" asked Draco

"You're in as much pain as I am, I don't have to burden you, because you share the same pains I do. we have equal pain and equal burdens, its not so hard as if it was with, you know, a normal person" as she spoke all Draco could think about was how much confidence this girl seems to have on the out side, and how much she is really in pain.


	6. Chapter 6

They walked and talked effortlessly to the great hall, passing few other students and only a handful of teachers. They didn't encounter any judgmental looks.

"so what table do you want to sit at?" Asked Draco pulling Hermione out of her thought.

"lets sit at the Ravenclaw table, that way neither house can have an issue with us. And Slytherins don't have an issue there, nor with Gryffindor." Said Hermione mater of factly as they took their place at the end of the table.

The hall had more students then normal for it being so early in the morning, and to Hermione's surprise Ginny, harry and Ron sat in the middle of the Gryffindor table. The boys had their backs to the door, but Hermione met Ginny's eyes. She looked surprised and a little scared, but didn't make a fuse. Draco sat down, and Hermione sat opposite him. They heard a few hushed whispers.

"so what do you want for breakfast this morning Hermione?" asked Draco, not wanting to push the subject but figuring that a direct approach with this topic was the best.

"im..not really hungry this morning Draco." She said, as her tummy rumbled and Draco heard it.

" I know why you don't want to eat, but you need to. Its not a matter of what I want you to do. it's want you need to do." Draco spoke as he conjured his breakfast and the food he wanted her to eat. He had summoned an egg white omelet, with sage sausage and spinach for himself, and a bowl of oatmeal, fruit and a yogurt for Hermione.

"im not going to eat this Draco…I'm sorry but I just cant." She was starting to feel ashamed of herself. It was just one meal, and he didn't ask her to eat it, he was just showing that he cared about her. This was going to be difficult to get used to she thought.

"im not going to get made if you get sick, I'm not going to get mad if only eat a few bites, what makes me upset is that your not trying. Where's the brave Gryffindor I know is in there somewhere?" Draco hoped he hadn't have gone to far. Hermione picked up a spoon and grabbed the bowl of oatmeal. She kept her hands on the bowl after she put her spoon into the thick mass.

" I don't remember the last time I had oatmeal. I think Mrs. Weasely tried to make it for me when I was sick over the summer. But I wasn't able to hold anything down. She tried to give me a potion to help, but when you force it…the potion doesn't work." She moved the oats around in her bowl.

" I used to eat oatmeal every morning. With cream and strawberries. I stopped eating that once my father left the manor. My mother never would eat, and I stopped going to the dinning room for breakfast. The house elves would try to bring me food, but I wouldn't eat much if any. The daughter elf of the one my father killed brought me this style omelet. She told me that it was not my fault her mother was killed, and she loves being my house elf." Draco noticed that as he spoke she took one or two spoon fulls of her breakfast.

' im not a fan of how most people treat house elves, but I understand their history and why they are needed. I'm enjoying how warm I feel. I know im not eating much. But it feels good not to feel stomach pains. I cant eat much more. But im trying." she knew that he was happy that she tried. He was smiling as he cleared the remaining food from his plate. " I don't feel sick. Normally anytime I eat anymore its because I feel guilty, and my friends make me eat. But today I felt sick because I hadn't eaten anything. Im glad things are changing."

"Hermione, thank you for eating, you'll see that the rest of the day will be a lot easier not that you don't have to try so hard to ignore it." Draco, with out thinking took her hand, that was resting on the table. She thought of pulling her hand away but decided that this was ok, people were going to find out eventually.

"we should talk to harry, and Ginny and Ron. I cant have them find out from gossip." She said, pulling her hand away, and cleaning her face with her napkin.

"why not ask them to help you with a special heads project, and meet me in one of the empty class rooms near the potions room. We have class at 9, which gives us some time. If there is time before class, id like you to talk to my father with me." Draco finished talking, and cleaned his mouth too. Hermione gave a small smile.

"im going to have to tell them everything…. I don't know how much they can handle at one time. Maybe ill tell then about everything today, and then about you and I in a week or two." Hermione was starting to get scared, and started to get the feeling of needing to cut, but instead of running off her thoughts were interrupted by Draco.

"tell them what ever you need to, love. Ill be with you no matter what. Unless you will me away I'm by your side." Draco took her hand again and kisses it.

They stood up and looked at one another. "ill let you go talk to them and meet you in, ten minuets in classroom D-135? Its got the nice fireplace that's always on so it'll be warm." Draco finished.

'ok, see you soon" said Hermione, walking in the direction of her friends.

"hey, your not normally here this late, sleep in?" asked Ginny, as the boys turned to hug her good morning, Ron with food crumbs all over his shirt.

"no, I've been up. Draco and I ate together we had house things to discuss, and.." she was interrupted by Ron "since when do you call him Draco, its like your friends or something" he spoke with venom in his words.

" I will call anyone I choose by their given name. and since I haven't spent much time away from the library or my common room, he's called a truce. We are on the way to becoming friends." Hermione was trying not to start shaking. Standing up for herself or other people was really hard, and with out Draco next to her it was worse.

"people don't change, he is the same slimy git on the inside as much as he is on the outside." Said harry.

"You have no right to say that. What about you," she said turning to Ginny " do you have anything negative to say?"

"nope, im cool with Draco. He cares about you. And he knows what's been bothering you. And anyone who looks out for my best friend, even when she wont talk to me, is ok in my eyes." Said Ginny.

"that's why I'm here, I need to talk to you. All three of you. Now please. I know you've been worried about me and I know that I haven't been honest. But I need…no I want to tell you what's going on." Hermione stood up. " you can either come or not come. But im not going to open up to you again. You either care about me or you don't. but I need to change, and to heal and to grow, and repeating myself isn't going to do that." she started to walk away, and she heard Ginny yell wait up. The three of them caught up to her as she reached the doors to the great hall.

" so where are we going?" asked Ron. Hermione took the stairs down to the classroom where Draco was waiting.

" to an empty class room. I don't want unwanted company" she said as they walked

"Hermione, I know one of the things you plan on telling us, and if you don't want to share it. That's ok. But I do want you to promise me you'll stop." Asked harry.

Hermione stopped in front of the class room where Draco was waiting. "we'll talk." Was all she said as she walked inside.

Hermione saw Draco sitting next to the fireplace. He had moved the desks back making room for a few arm chairs and a love seat for him and Hermione. As they entered the room, he stood up. " why is he here Hermione? Hey ferret boy get lost we are using this room" spoke Ron.

"this involves him, he stays if you don't like it leave. Im tired of pretending. Im sick of hiding. And im exhausted of hurting." She said as she took a seat next to Draco, as Ginny sat on the arm of Harry's chair, next to Ron.

" I'm not leaving. You're my girlfriend Hermione why would I do that" said Ron

"Ron, I'm not your girlfriend." She said kind of softly looking down

" we went to hogsmade together, and you come over all the time in the summer. I thought..?"

"no Ron…please can I talk?" they said yes. " I know ive been distant this year. And with break starting the day after tomorrow, I need to tell you incase something happens." She took off her sweater and rolled up her button downs sleeves. She didn't have her arms bandaged or covered. Her scars and the day old cuts lay open for all to see.

"oh, Hermione" said Ginny her eyes full of tears "why.. I know people are mean to you. but"

"this is more then a couple of people being childish with me...i…cutt. I do it when I get too strong of a feeling, any feeling. When I screw up in class, when my nightmares are too strong. Those nightmares are of things that have happened to me." She grabbed Draco's hand and took a deep breath. The others in the room didn't say anything. Ginny had moved from her perch on Harrys chair to on the floor next to Hermione. " I don't want to go back home. Things at home are…horrible for me. Since before I came to Hogwarts my father has been,..doing things me. Beating me and slapping, and….and…"tears were rolling down her face and she turned into Draco's chest. She started to shake alittle. He hugged her, and rocked her slightly.

" Hermione's father has been violently beating and raping her for a number of years. He's gotten worse. He's told her not to tell anyone or he'll kill her. She's found relief in cutting because it's a pain she can control. In her mind it helps. She's also hasn't been eating as you know, or as her friends should have noticed. Something happened and she feels the need to deny herself food. But im changing that. I'm changing a lot of things." Draco stopped talking and allowed Hermione to sit up. "thank you" she whispered.

Ginny, still sitting by Hermione's feet was crying, she didn't know what to say. She friend had been hurting, inside and out and was hurting herself more. "Hermione why didn't you tell me? I could understand the boys, but..I'm your best friend why did you need to keep this from me?" Ginny said looking up at her friend.

" I didn't tell you because I didn't want to make you sad. I didn't want you to worry about me. I didn't know how to tell you. I'm broken, I'm no good. How could I possibly tell you and have you understand ?" Hermione let go of Draco's hand and slide off of the couch to hug her friend. " oh Ginny I'm so sorry."

" no Hermione, I'm sorry. I should have known something was wrong. But I want everyone to be happy and have a good time all the time. I don't like to see the bad."

Harry and Ron looked at each other. Ron was mad, at himself and at her father. Ron had liked Hermione for years, and thought she was the strongest person he knew, but he was mad at himself for not seeing that she was in trouble.

The silence was broken up by Ginny and Hermione crying. But then Harry spoke up " Hermione, you didn't need to hide. I cant speak for Ron, but I know Ginny and I would have done something to protect you. You never wanted anyone to know because your scared of him. I know what its like to be haunted by nightmares. Ginny knows I used to cut. But I stopped because it wasn't worth it. I got too close to not being able to stop. And I didn't want to lose those closest to me, which includes you." Harry sat down on the floor. ' I should have known when flinched after holidays when any one of us tried to hug you, and your injuries weren't from you being clumsy. But one night this summer you had fallen asleep near the fireplace. I went down to get a glass of water and I saw you. I went to cover you with a blanket and I saw the blisters. Then I noticed the thin white marks along your arms. I wanted to wake you up. I wanted to demand that you told me who had done that to you. But if it had been by a person of magic you wouldn't have been alive. So I figured you'd come to me in your own time. Last night when I cornered you, it was because Ginny was starting to notice the signs too." He paused a moment, looking more at Ron then at anyone else "Hogwarts doesn't know suicide. But I do, your actions were not safe, and I was afraid that I was going to lose you." Harry said. Looking at Ron, who didn't seem to have moved. "Ron?"

" what harry? What do you want me to say? I didn't notice any of it. I just figured it was typical girl shit. i thought she loved me. Because she sat next to me at meals, or helped me with homework, or went to my house over breaks. I thought she was concerned about me. But I feel like shit because never once did I worry about her. And now I find out not only is she in danger, shes shacking up with my enemy. Im sorry, I cant have a crying love fest like you guys. Its not that I don't care, but its not what I expected" ron got up from his chair, and looked at Draco "to me you will never change. I will tolerate you only because I love her, or I thought I loved her. If you hurt her, or lay a hand on her in a negative way, or do anything to make her hurt herself, I will kill you. I promise you that, im going to class." Ron said and walked off.

" I love her, and will protect her, who's the one walking out Ronald?" said Draco standing between Ron and Hermione.


	7. Chapter 7

AN: Im really Sorry about the mishap with the last chapter loading, I must have miss labeled a chapter document. I have been very busy with school, and have found little spare time to write. I am continuing this story. I have a lot more in store for our main couple, and Yes, Snape will be around through the whole thing too. I wish I could write faster, but alas, i sadly can not. I have more chapters ready, but I go through each before I post and change and tweak it a bit. Reviews are always welcomed and please enjoy the real chapter 7

The others remained on the floor, "Can you believe him? He made this all about him, when this is all about you Mia." Said Draco as He extended his arm to Harry.

"I want to thank you for taking care of her. You have, even in a little way been one of the only kindnesses she has known. I know I caused her pain, but I am working on a way for her to forgive me for it. Now that we all know as much as we need to, we can work together to help her, and not that it really matters to you, but helping her is helping me too, What do you say, friends? Or at least…a truce?' Harry took his hand and Draco pulled him up. With their hands gripping one another, they gave each other a sort of warrior hug.

"For Hermione I will try to be your friend. But I will still kick your ass at Quidditch." Harry said with a smile. They were soon interrupted by Ginny, who seemed to push her way in-between the boys, taking Harry's hand, and smiling at Draco.

"We already talked, and I am keeping an open mind, it will take a little getting used to. And I might freak out if I catch you too snogging in the halls. But I'm ok with it." Said Ginny.

"Im glad at least you two are on my side. Ron should come around in a few days." Said Hermione, knowing that Ron might never be ok with this, but she still had hopes.

The feeling inside of her was gratefulness. She was grateful to have friends, and to be happy. But this happy wasn't going to last very long. It never did, and never would, not for her. Happiness never left a lasting impression. There always seemed to be something in the way.

If Hermione only had two days left to be happy, where would she go? Thought Ginny, As if Harry had read her mind he interrupted.

"Hermione, if you don't want to go home your welcome at Grimwald place, there are plenty of rooms, and you haven't seen it since we cleaned up." Ginny then added "I'll be there so you won't be alone. We'll just have to spend Christmas Eve and day at the Burrow."

She took it in, her friends offering her freedom, but she had her things still in her bedroom at home, if they were even still there. Even if she went somewhere else, she'd have to go home at some point during the break. Or worst, her father would somehow find her when she wasn't at Hogwarts.

"I don't know Gin, Rons really angry with me, I don't want to start anything by being a part of your families holiday" she said In a small , slightly saddened voice

"of screw my brother, your my best friend, you're like a sister to Harry, you are always welcome, if Ron has a problem he can leave. " said Ginny with her red headed rage flickering off of her words.

Draco had stood next to Hermione, quietly listening to the conversation. When no one spoke for a moment he took the opportunity, and broke the silence.

"Mia, I got a letter before you came into the room. My father has finally found, or rather his body was found. He's dead, and so is my mother. The manor has been left solely to the only Malfoy hire, If you want you are welcome to come and live there, permanently. There is plenty of space, I only use a few rooms, there are a lot of empty and unused spaces, and I'd like you to consider the offer." He said as he kissed her hand

"I don't know what to say, to either of you. I want to get out of there. But he'll find me.' She paused "He'll find me, and he'll kill me" she took a breath, and looked at the floor, "I don't want to pick one of you over the other, but Harry, Draco and I just found each other, and maybe spending the holiday with him could be productive for my healing and us, as a couple." She said in her Hermione logical tone.

Ginny talked first "so it's official? You two are really going to go public? Already? Don't you think its too soon"

"oh Ginny," said Hermione, looking at Draco, "I feel safe with him. I know he can protect me, with or without magic. And I feel, I would guess love for him. The way I know you feel for Harry. I need him. I'm so tired, of hurting, of hiding and of not living. Draco makes me want to live. A few days ago I didn't want to continue living the way I am. I was going to go home…..and not come back." She looked at them, and grabbed everyone into a hug " but right now, I don't want that any more. I like feeling. I like this feeling. I have a reason to live. And I don't want to lose that" a tear slide out of her eye and Draco wiped it with his finger

" you don't need to worry about going anywhere, I'll be there for you no matter what. So its settled than, you'll go home with me?" asked Draco

"Hermione?" Ginny loudly whispered "say yes" and she nudged her

"Ok, yes Draco, I'd love to go home with you, what am I a little lost kitten?" she asked as Draco wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"You're not, but sometimes when you sleep, it sounds like purring" he said jokingly

Ginny giggled, and Harry shook his head "you know Hermione that was way too much information, but Draco, your right, she did always sound like a kitten when she was sleeping peacefully. Its been awhile since I've heard her sleep like that."

"I hate to be a kill joy but it's time for class. Hermione, we'll have to talk to Snape after class now." Spoke Draco, as Hermione redressed, rolling down her sleeves and pulling on her sweater.

Harry grabbed his bag "Draco, I'm sorry for the past. But I'm sure that from now on. Things will be better. My main concern is keeping my friends and family safe. I'll keep your name in good light from now on, I don't expect your house to do the same, but it could be nice." The boys shook hands, and left the room and the girls walked out together into the potions class room.

With-in the hour the room was filled the bubbling cauldrons and students chopping herbs or taking notes. Snape was at his desk. The class went by with no problems. The time was almost up, and potion evaluation was about to start. A tray with several mini-cauldrons had a sample of every team's potion.

"Alright class, utensils down, and take a seat." He paused a moment as the sound of metal hit the wooden tables, and stools were pulled out from under the work stations. "Please open your books to chapter 8, 'potions for protections and empowerment'. In the Wizerding world, there are many charms that will repel muggles, create a hiding place, and making places sound proof. However, there are no charms that will make a person think a situation is not as it really it. This type of potion, when properly brewed, will cause that reaction. Once the drinker has had 3 minutes to allow the effect to start, anything you tell the person will appear as if it is happening to them. This potion is brewed with caution. It has been used to torture and to kill. It has been used to drive people insane within an inch of their life. It has also been used to as a reenactment potion for people on trial, or those who have ." He paused and took a drink from his mug, then continued the lecture. "been witness to traumatic events"

"There is a way to brew this potion, so it has a lower side effect. We will be following a child draft dose recipe, located on the next page. Please read over the chapter. This potion has a lot of steps and stages. You will need special tools, and I am not telling you what they are, tomorrow you will need to have your team's tools, and ingredient list on your table by the time class starts. And to be fair, Mr. Malfoy and Miss Granger you will be working on a separate project, being that the heads spend more time they have better chance to prepare, thus my assigning a separate assignment to them. Now that is all for the day, please clean up and be on your way, I'll be in my office with the head girl and boy if you are in need of assistance." He finished talking and walked into his office, leaving the door ajar.

Hermione finished packing her bag, and finished wiping the table top, double checking that the surface was clean.

"You ready Miss Granger? We shouldn't keep professor Snape waiting." Spoke Draco as he pushed in his stool, then hers.

"yes, let's get this over with." She said as she stepped in front of Draco, and into the office.

"Draco, shut the door please." Said the potion master, as he sat near the fire in his office.

"Would either of you like any tea? Or something?" he asked as he gestured for them to sit across from him.

" No, thank you sir." Spoke Hermione, as Draco said "A fire whiskey would be lovely, father."

The man smiled, and handed Draco a teacup "You know that I can't give that to you until after graduation. Or when you're on break at the least. Silly boy."

Draco took the teacup smiling, and sat closer to Hermione, who was sitting very ridged and slightly trembling.

"Now, you must know that I don't have a special project for you, but we can act like it. Tomorrow is the last day before break, and to me, Hermione's safety is the most important concern at the moment." He paused to sip his tea "Draco talked to me this morning, and as a teacher I'm surprised, as a man I'm angry, and as a friend I am scared."

"That is very kind of you sir…"

"please, dear, call me Severus when we are no in front of another student" he said with out missing a beat.

"Severus, you don't need to be angry, you knew what he was doing, You took me away from it when I was eleven. You don't need to be scared," she paused for a moment too long and sighed "not any more. But as far as you being surprised, I'm unsure of what your surprised about." She finished talking and Draco took her hand into his, and kissed it. She felt her cheeks go red slightly.

"That, right there, your love. Even if you don't call it that right away, it's there, clear as day. I know it's been a day, but I can see it. You're looking at her the way I would look at her." Draco knew the "Her" Snape was talking about was Lily, he couldn't bring himself to say her name that often. " and she looks at you the way I had wished for her to look at me. You, my dear are very brave and strong" Hermione went to protest but was cutoff as snape continued " I am not surprised that you decided to cause yourself harm, after someone hurt you in such ways I'm surprised it only stopped at cutting" this time Hermione interrupted Snape.

"To be honest, I had thought about other things Severus. I didn't plan on returning to school after the break. If he touched me even once, I was going to make it look like an accident. I know the wizarding world doesn't know suicide, but I do, and I had a plan..i had to have a plan." She had a tears coming down from her eyes.

Draco, taking a deep breath, wiped her tears and kisses her cheek. "But that's a thing of the past, I hope. You don't need to have those plans, not anymore."

" I'm glad you two finally settled your differences. Now, what are your plans for holiday?"

"I have invited her to stay with me, at the manor, it's so big, and empty, it will be nice to have the company, and I have asked Hermione to move in after the end of the year."

"well, that is nice, and Hermione what are our feelings on It?" asked snape, seeming more like a muggle therapist then a potions master.

"I have accepted his offer for the holiday. But im still afraid. My father has send me repeated letters saying how much he loves me, can't wait to see me, if I don't come home I'm going to regret it, and things of that nature. As scared as I am of him finding me, im more afraid of what I'd do if I go back to that house." She sighed " but I will be needing to go to that house at some point for the rest of my belongings, if they are still there at all."


	8. Chapter 8

Hermione was finding a new found strength. It was radiating out from her core, perhaps it was her heart being introduced to pure love for the first time in that way. As the conversation between the three of them continued Hermione felt herself relaxing, a weight was being lifted as if she was coming out of a spell. This both scared her and gave her joy. Her thoughts were interrupted by a question from snape.

"What are your plans for after graduation Hermione?"

"At this point I didn't think I'd get there. I wanted to be a healer, but I can't do that now. But I thought perhaps starting a sort of half-way house. A sort of safe haven for muggle-borns who don't have a support system in the muggle world but who choose to learn the magical arts. I know it sounds silly, but it's something I wished I had the option of." Draco looked at her and smiled

"Trust you to come up with an idea like that, it's amazing. The minister of magic has been fighting over what to do with muggle born children whose parents don't allow them to use or learn magic. Some of the cases are horrible, children have been killed Hermione, your plan may be a very big deal for the ministry." As he finished his words he saw her face, horror and sadness. So he added on " with your kindness and open heart you will make sure that no witch or wizard has to endure to things you have. You will show those children that there can be a place of love, where they can ask questions about their magical abilities."

Snape spoke next, smiling ear to ear "I will help you with that goal in any way I am able, I am also sure that the headmaster will want to have a part in this. You're his favorite students, also he'll want to know about your, situation. "

The thought had not passed Hermione's mind until she heard Snape saw it. They would have to tell Dumbledore. They would have to tell the whole school. They would have to be in the publics eye. Then, the idea came to her, what her and Draco could spend their time doing instead of the potion project that they did not have to do.

"Severus, how would a ST. Valentine's Ball go over you think?" she asked

Draco, looked at her smiling knowing very little of what she was thinking. "why on Valentine's day?" he asked her

Snape interrupted "why not? That sounds like a wonderful idea. I'll assume you want to spend your potions time on that?" Hermione nodded her head. "Well, I think the headmaster should know, about the project, we can give you two some time to get to know each other better." Snape was then interrupted by Draco, who was talking more to Hermione then to Snape.

"Why not wait to go public until the ball? We'll have to be together while planning it, and we have all of the same classes, if people start to whisper it will only be a few weeks until the ball. If we make it a masked ball we can go together, and at midnight unmask. It would be perfect." Draco finished and kisses her hand.

"Well, you two have a lot of work to do." He moved his hand and a piece of paper appeared "here is a pass to the headmaster, it have a message to him. Go up to his office now. He'll be expecting you. Go. Go"

With that the two of them got up and left the potion office and went up to the headmaster office. As they walked up the stairs Hermione heard her name being called from behind.

"Hey, damn it Hermione stop when I'm talking to you.!" Yelled Ron

Hermione stopped, and sighed "what Ronald?"

"I want to let you know, that if this" he said pointing to Draco and her holding hands

"Continues you will never be allowed at my house again. You made me think you loved me, you made me believe that you cared about me." Hermione was cowering against Draco, who was ready to fight. Draco gently pushed Hermione in back of himself

"How dare you talk to her like that. It's not her fault you're a stupid ass that can't understand anything. She has always been your friend, she cares about you, like a brother not a lover. You talk to her with a raised voice or dare raise a hand at her you will rue that day." Draco didn't want to start something, but was ready to duel if needed.

"oh don't talk for her, she's a big girl she can talk for herself" said Ron.

Hermione stepped out from in back of Draco, "fine, you want me to talk, I'll talk. You never ask how I am feeling, or how my day has been, you ask me about homework or ask if I'll do it for you, you think you're this big important person because you are Harry Potter's best friend. You think you're special because you made the house Quidditch team.

I have bad days and I don't show it, you get angry if they don't serve the right flavored pudding at meal times. You've never been beaten, you've never been raped, and you've never tried to take your own life, because living was too painful. Don't try to tell me to calm down, I'm done. " Ron went to talk, but Hermione was faster with her wand, and silenced him "No, don't you dare interrupt me. How did you not know what I was doing

? Because you don't care, about anyone but yourself. If I go home, I'm not coming back. If I go home, to the place where pain and fear and afraid are the only feelings I ever feel I'm not coming back. You'll get a letter ,if that, saying that my body was found. I'd rather kill myself before I back to him, back to that house."

Everyone seemed to have been in class or heard her yelling and went the other way, "how am I supposed to know if you don't tell anyone?" asked ron, getting all red in the ears.

"why do you think I don't tell anyone….i don't want to be a burden to anyone." Hermione decided that it wasn't worth it to continue this conversation. Ron was never going to understand, nor did he want to. They needed to go to the headmaster as well.

"Hermione, I loved you. I wanted to love you, but you always shut me out." He said looking almost saddened

" im sorry if you thought that, but I don't love you that way, you will always have my love. But you can't be the one to save me. Im too broken and too used for you. Draco understands what's going on. He knows what it's like to be afraid, and to hurt" she took a step forward and reached for Ron's hand

" Ron you will always remain my friend if you want to be. But you much know and respect that Draco is in my life now, and I don't plan on letting him go." She stood her ground, with what little strength was build up she held her head high " ill talk later Ron, we need to go."

And with that they turned and left Ron alone in the hall way. Knowing that the redheaded boy was still watching Hermione's every move, Draco made a cute play to pat her bum, she grabbed his hand instead, and he curled it up and kissed it gently. "you my dear, are far braver then you believe. You really do make your house proud." Said draco as they turned the corner to the passage way that lead to the headmasters office.

The stone figures face twisted and yawned "Password? Children." He said spreading his wings

"Professor Snape sent us here with a pass, this is what it says 'from these two hearts the weight of the world, from these two souls a new hope' that's it" spoke Draco.

"the headmaster will see you now" and with that the wings pulled back and a staircase appeared. It only took a moment from being in the hall way to knocking on the door to the office.

"come in" was all they heard, and the shuffling of papers and clinking of objects.

" I got Snapes message, please sit I am interested in this idea." Dumbledore said from behind his desk. They both sat down and Draco spoke up first.

" Being that Ms. Granger and I live in the same space and share a common room, it was agreed that we needed to have an alternate project to work on from that of other students who do not have so much time with one another. We decided that our project should be a St. Valentines dance for all the students. We will have a masked ball. Students will be told to go to a classroom, and a doorway will put the charm on the students to have their true identity hidden. We will have a full unmasking at midnight." Draco stopped talking and looked at Hermione, who continued by saying "this idea means a great deal to both Draco and I." she took a deep breath and Draco felt her tense up, but understood that she needed to tell him. With the strength Hermione could find inside her heart, supported by draco next to her, she opened herself up to the old mad behind the half-moon glasses.

The conversation went on one sided for about 20 minutes as Hermione told him about her life, and the true nature of her injuries.

" a few days ago Draco and I came to a understanding. We both were in pain, and both needed someone to love. These past two days I haven't felt dead inside. I haven't been fully afraid of life. Sir, for the first time, I feel like I have a reason to see the sun every morning, and going to bed is painful, because I have to say good-night. So there it is sir. The truth. We want to use to ball as a full on coming out event. Draco and I will be spending a great deal of time having to prepare for the ball, so that will already start a buzz. Once midnight tolls on the eve of the ball we will unmask ourselves first, then the rest of the school. If we can overcome our houses differences, then any other student who is in another house can love the person behind the mask."

"well, I am lost for words. I had known that your father was unkind. But I had no idea he was that horrible. The unmasking is a grand idea. And I am proud of you. Both of you. Draco you are a very kind and loving man regardless of being under the dark hand of your father, with him past you can shed new light to the Malfoy name. Im sure there are a lot of people who will not approve of this union but I for one am glad for it. Hermione, I am so sorry that I neglected to notice what was wrong, I assure you, if your father is seen on Hogwarts grounds he hill only be leaving in one way." Albus took a moment to sip some tea, and Hermione took that moment to speak. She was shaking slightly, Draco took her hand and kissed it.

"We wish for this to stay between us, and a few of the teachers. We have talked about the anticipating rumors, and Ronald Weasley is not happy about this and will most likely have unkind things to say on the matter. But we want the dance to be when we fully come out into the wizarding world as a couple."

The old man smiled, and spoke his final words for this meeting.

"I will only tell the teachers that are important to your protection. Minerva must be told so not to worry about her houses top student. Other than that I will direct teachers to owl you two with any questions. Now for the dance anything you need owl me, and I will have the order sent to your common room. I have the supply catalogs for you here" he snapped and a stack of magazines appeared. " One more thing Hermione, I understand you are not going to be going home for the holiday, do you have a place to stay, its not too late to stay here, you are always most welcome here at Hogwarts. I want to ensure that you will come of no harm over holiday."

"we will be staying at Draco's Manor house for the holiday, we want to spend more time getting to know one another, and allows extra time for the dance to be set up." Spoke Draco 'if it is alright with you sir, we need to go to Transfiguration class."

"of course, here is a pass, be well, owl me when you get settled tomorrow at the manor, I want to know that all is well. I do enjoy a happy ending" the old man handed them the note. And opened his newspaper, the pictures on the cover danced to life, and the porthole closed in back of Hermione.

The halls were empty, and Draco checked his watch. "it's pointless to go to class, it ends in 3 minutes. Want to just go back to the common room? We don't have class, we can pack for break."


	9. Chapter 9

They walked to the common room, the day light fading fast on the cold winter night

"I guess that sounds good. I'm just kind a tired. There has been so much going on it's…" said Hermione, as she rubbed at her forearm without realizing it.

"No, stop It right there, you do not need to mark, cutting isn't going to make this any better nothing bad has happened" said Draco as they crossed the door into the heads common room.

"No, Draco don't you see? Everything happened today, everyone knows, or will know soon enough. Everyone will think I'm so weak, I am weak, soon everyone is going to know about us. What are we going to say to them? They are going to think I'm an awful whore, I'm nothing but a dirty mu…"

"Look at me Hermione," he said standing in front of her " you are not a mudblood, there is not one thing dirty about you, you are kind and loving, and need to be shown just as much love and kindness that you have shown to others." he took her hand and placed it on his chest.

"Do you feel that, this heart is beating right now because you have shown me love. The other night I was ready to go away and not come back. I needed a reason for living and you gave that to me. Am I not enough reason to keep you alive too?" He spoke and he knew he had let a tear slide down his face. Hermione was trying to quiet her tears too, but it wouldn't work

"You're all the reason I need, but I'm not used to love Draco. This feeling it scares me so much, can it last?" she asked falling to the ground; Draco went down with her and pulled her into his arms. "I have this need to cut; don't you feel like that too?"

"Hermione, I love you, you're the only person that I could think of spending my life with. I don't want there to be a day with-out you. Please do not think for a moment that our love is false. We have overcome a great deal just telling each other our most awful secrets, yes I feel like cutting. But loving you and being with you is stronger than that. Oh hell" he pulled her forward and kissed her, instantly he thought she would push him away, but instead she kissed him back she climbed into his lap, straddling him she felt him put his arms around her.

"Hermione if you keep kissing me like that I'm not going to want to stop. I'll want to do more, and I don't want you to do that unless you're ready for it.I will only make love to you when you ask me to."

"Draco, I love you, isn't this what you want?" she asked, with a voice as if she had done something wrong.

"Even if I did, do you really want this right this moment?" asked Draco, brushing his hand against her cheek.

"No, not yet." She climbed off him, and sat in a ball next him, "but I do want to. And that too scares me. But are you sure you can love someone like me? Who's been used and unloved so many times?"

She turned from him, feeling ashamed of the things that were beyond her control.

"Can you love a man who wants nothing more than to protect you and love you, and show you the kindness you or he was never shown?" he said, not really looking for an answer.

"We are both fucked up I guess" She said laughing a moment

"yes we are, we are so far gone from what we should be, we really are meant for one another" said Draco, flicking his wand to light the fire place. Soon the room was drenched in a bath of warmth and comfort.

"It's a pity we didn't agree to talk sooner; we could have had more time together, not that we have a limited time. We have as long as we want" said Draco

"It would have been harder to hide, if we didn't have the heads common room" added Hermione

" Well if we didn't become heads There's always the prefects bathroom" smiled Draco.

"There is only one reason two students go there and you and I both know it." She said giggling slightly.

"Well, after the move you did before it's all I can think of, no girl has ever kissed me like that before. ..Ever." Draco thought to himself that making love to her right now, in front of the fire would be amazing, it had been awhile since he had a relationship, cutting took the place of the need for sex.

"Like how?" she asked, "How did I kiss you?"

"You kissed me like I was the only one on the planet the needed your love. "He whispered to her.

"You are"

"What? "He asked

"You're the only man who deserves my love. You don't demand my love, you don't ask me to do things for you ,other than to be myself, and that's not something you ask of me, you encourage it of me, and to tell the truth and to be honest with you and more importantly with myself. You're the first person to say you're sorry and I believe you. You're the first person I see myself loving." She said

The night went on with Hermione and Draco curling up in front of the fire talking. Draco sat with his back against the couch, and his legs stretched out in front of him. Hermione ended up with her head on his lap, he started to run his fingers through her hair.

After a long pause from talking Hermione whispered "what is it like?"

"What's what like,Mia?" asked Draco, confused by the sudden change of subject.

"Sex." She spoke out, but low, and hushed yet Draco heard.

"Love you don't need to.." he started but was interrupted.

"No I want to know, what he did to me wasn't love or sex, all it was, was pain and anger and all it caused was agony. What does making love feel like?" she was shamed she was asking, but she felt more than love for Draco. She needed him emotionally, and what scared her the most, she felt drawn to him physically. It was if it was the same draw as cutting.

"I don't know, I've only had sex with one other girl, and I didn't love her. I thought I did, but I was a stupid child."

"I want to make love to you Draco, some day. But I'm afraid that if we do things ill want to cut like I would after…"

"I'd start slow" he said rubbing his hand down her arm, tracing his fingertips lightly over her cuts as he did this he continued with " and take my time, and make sure that any move I made was pleasing you, not hurting you. Physical or emotional. If we have to wait a week, a month, a year, 10 years I would, if it means just one night with you." He spoke reassuring her.

"Why do you have to be so wonderful?" she said lightly

"Because I'm tired of living in a world of hate, lies and pain" he said in a stern voice.

Hermione let out a yawn. " I guess I'm going to go to bed. I need to pack for holiday, and we should map out what we need to do for the ball in the morning."

Draco stood up, helping Hermione to her feet. He took a good long look at her, noticing that her breathing was very strained and shallow. "I agree, but love, you really need to eat more, you look close to death. We both were very close to it. But it's not enough. You need to eat, and live. I know your trying. But I want you to keep trying. I don't want to lose you now that I have you." Draco said, before wrapping his arms around her.


	10. Chapter 10

"I'm going to take a shower, would you mind laying with me until I fall asleep?" she asked.

"Sure love, I could stay if you like" Draco said, in hopes that he could hold her through the night.

"Not tonight love. I need you to be patient with me. I'm okay at the moment, but I really need to be alone for a while." She said hopeing he wouldn't be upset with her.

"I'll lay with you until you're asleep. Then kiss your forehead goodnight, and go into my own room to sleep. If you need though, you're always welcome to come sleep next to me. I don't sleep nude so nothing to be alarmed by." As Draco said this he thought to himself, he had never seen Hermione in her night clothes. She was always in her uniform or jeans and a sweater.

Before letting Hermione go, Draco took both wrists in his hands. He turned them over and looked for a moment; he didn't feel Hermione pulling her arms back. "I look at you, and I see a strong, intelligent beautiful woman, someone who can challenge me into being a better version of myself. When I look at your cuts, I see this part of you that you didn't let anyone else see, until me, and I ask myself, why me? I see all of this pain and anger. And unlike so many in our world, you never took that bottled up rage out on anyone. Please promise me, Mia, that you will not cut tonight. Today has been hard, and you're doing amazing, but I feel the need to cut, I know you are too." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a elastic band. He slipped it over her hand, making sure it didn't pull over any scabs. "Severus asked me to stop, I tried but I couldn't do it. I would be ok for a few days, once it was over a week. But something always got to me .he told me that when I felt the urge to mark, snap the band, the band will cause slight, instant pain, but it isn't going to harm you. Please try it?"

Hermione ran her fingers over the rubber of the band, "it can't hurt I guess" then she giggled and Draco gave her a confused look "I guess that's the point though. Sorry I must be really tired it was kinda funny."

"Go get clean love, I'm going to go put on night clothes" said Draco, kissing her forehead she went into her room.

Hermione wanted to grab her razor box. She went to walk toward the dresser where the box was hidden among sweaters and ties, but she stopped. Feeling for the elastic band she pulled it away from her arm, and with trembling fingers let it go. The "snap" sound was short and within a moment her skin was prickled with a slight pain, it wasn't as intense as cutting, but it did ease the need. She pulled the band again, and moved it over a newer cut, one that wasn't fully healed. When she released the band this time it hurt more, and felt like heaven. The need to cut was passing, and Hermione felt like she could breathe. Leaving the box in its hidden place, she grabbed her shorts under garments and long sleeved sleeping shirt she went into the bathroom, and showered.

Draco stood outside her door, listening to her. He let out a small sigh hearing the familiar snapping of the band. Knowing that she wasn't going to hurt herself, he went into his room. Sitting on his bed was a letter from the Ministry of Magic. The will. He thought to himself.

He opened the letter :

Dear Master Draco Malfoy,

We regrettably acknowledge the passing of your father. After an inquiry about your status as the only hire to the Malfoy vault and Manor, we have come to the conclusion that everything has been left to you.

We ask that you collect your fathers remains by the First of the new year, if you do not he will be released to the Department of Magical remains and resting places. Enclosed is a new key to your vault and a new key to the manor. We have changed these locks for your safety. Once you have gone to these places, and used these keys they will change lock and key again. This time you will be the only one allowed to enter.

Please send return owl with any questions

Draco set the paper on his desk. And sighed, he already knew it was all his. But as for his father's body, it had no place in the Malfoy cemetery, Draco would rather he rot in small hole, unknown to anyone. He grabbed his sleeping pants and took off his trousers. His skin was pale, and his features defined. There was only one thing Draco spent more time then school work on and that was Quidditch training. He didn't normally sleep with a shirt, but didn't want to curl up with Hermione half naked, so he put on a thin tank top shirt. His shoulder scar was seen from under the thin shirt, and his scars and open cuts glowed in the dim light. "Time for bed" he said to no one, as he heard the bathroom door open and close on her side.

Draco walking into her room and saw her turning down the bed. He noticed her pillow case had blood stains on it, lines along the side some faded, others only a day or so old. "here" he said stepping behind her "you shouldn't sleep with a dirty pillowcase love" he moved his hand over the fabric, and the lines went away.

"how did you do that?" she asked

"wand-less, voiceless magic, something Severus has been trying to get taught here for years, but it's not easy, and can be dangerous' he said, as she climbed into the bed. She curled up, onto her side as Draco fallowed her. He draped his arm around her waist, and pulled her close. His head, rested above hers, and he took a deep breath, smelling her sweet smell from her shampoo.

"Draco" she said sleepily "at the feast tomorrow we shouldn't sit together at first, after the first course we could sit together, and talk about the ball. I know Ron is going to have a lot to say if he talked to me at all." She yawned and Draco saw her close her eyes

"Don't talk about him love, your better then he will ever be or deserves, go to sleep love, I'll leave in a little bit," he said

A few moments passed, and Hermione was breathing lightly, and was sleeping, peacefully he hoped, he got out of bed slowly, trying not to move too much, and he heard Hermione whisper his name

"Draco?...stay?" those were the last words he heard before getting back into bed, and taking the woman he loved back into his arms, and slept the soundest night either of them had slept in a long time.

The alarm clock went off and Draco growled but turned it off. As he opened her eyes, he suddenly went into a panic, Hermione was gone. As he jumped out of bed he heard the toilet flush and the door open.

"Is everything alright?" she asked as she put her sweater on over her button down

"What time did you get up love?" he asked as he pulled the comforter up, making the bed.

"I woke up about an hour ago, I didn't wake you did i?" she said "and you didn't need to make the bed." She walked over, and kisses his cheek. "Go get dressed Hun, I'll be in the common room. I want to look over those catalogs Dumbledore gave us." As she finished, her stomach let out a very loud rumble, and Draco gave her a stern look

"After I get dressed, we are going to get breakfast" he said

"Maybe I already ate, ever think of that?" She said playfully as they walked out of her room, and into the common room.

"I know you, you haven't, but I am glad you're in a good mood. Happy looks good on you." He said, leaving her in the main room, and going into his own.

As he left Hermione sitting in the common room at the homework table, she felt guilty. Yes she was happy, but during the hour she was awake before Draco, she had let him down. She didn't cut the way she normally would, making several long and nasty cuts. Instead she had made one single mark. It burned under her sweater, and she felt dissy.

Her head hit the table harder than it should have, and Draco, came running into the room, pulling on his own sweater.

"Hermione…come on….wake up" Draco said as he picked her up off of the table. "oh love." He continued as he saw the blood running down her arm, soaked through the fabric of her uniform.

Quickly, he took out his wand and gently pulled back her sleeve. He smelled the mix of iron and her perfume as he uttered the enchantment to heal her arm. And clean her shirts. Once the cut was healed, he gave her a tonic he had summoned from his room

"come on love drink" he was panicking, only slightly, but he had only just won her, he wasn't going to lose her, not like this.


	11. Chapter 11

Authors note: Im so sorry that it has taken so long to post, I have been between degrees in college, graduating, working 60 hours a week. I beg you forgive me, and enjoy this chapter. As always, reviews welcome!-end

She drank the potion and opened her eyes gasping, it took her a moment to realize where she was, and as she woke up, Draco hugged her so tight, it has even harder to breathe. He let go, as she started to cough. But she was there, alive and safe.

"Mia, what did you do?" he asked slowly

"I had a bad dream, and I couldn't take it...I'm sorry…I'm so sorry love. I didn't want to wake you…and…and" she had tears in her eyes and she looked scared and defeated. She fell into his arms, as he held her, rocking slightly on the floor.

"You did nothing wrong. All you did was do something that we are trying to stop…but it's hard to. I'm not mad. But You scared me; I thought I was going to lose you." he kissed her forehead. "If you had eaten something, you wouldn't have blacked out as fast. You are going to eat this morning. After what just happened you have to."

All she did was nod her head, and sigh "I'm sorry Draco" she said in a small quiet voice.

"I don't want you to apologize; I just don't want you hurt. If anything I am the one who is sorry, I shouldn't have stayed last night….it was too much for you. Wasn't it?" he said as they sat in front of the fire, facing each other

"Maybe it was a little. But I liked the way your arm felt wrapped around me, and that I slept for the most part. I had woken up around 4, and I couldn't sleep. When I went back to sleep, you had turned over. And I couldn't stop my nightmares. I guess I need to sleep in your arms to really sleep" she smiled soft.

"But that doesn't change the fact that you cut this morning, you could have talked to me. Woken me up, I would have rather you woken me up then let me sleep while you hurt yourself." He grabbed her hand, the opposite from the arm that was cut so not to hurt her

"I know. I'm working on it love…time for breakfast?" she asked

"Sure. You go ahead I want to go visit Severus for a moment. I'm going to skip the first course, I'll go to the feast in a little bit, once I'm there we can talk about the ball if you want."

"Don't be too long, I don't want Ronald to start something" she said picking up her bag, and checking it for a notepad and quill.

"Even if he did," Draco said, taking a step forward and placing a hand softly on her shoulder. "When I show up I'll finish it, you can count on that" when he finished talking he kissed he forehead, and she left. Soon after the door closed, Draco left and went to visit Snape.

Outside the snow had stopped, but the fridge air still hung low, between every tree and within every student.

The trip into the dungeons was fast for Draco, his feet knowing each move to make before he thought to make it. He found his way into the office. After a short hello, and an exchange of tea the conversation went on.

"I'm sorry to hear that this morning wasn't a perfect one. But there will be many more days like this. You did the same thing to me, the first time you tried to stop." Said Snape, as he packed the potion case on his desk. "How's the ball plans coming along?"

"We will be starting that in a little bit, we are going to sit together during the winter feast to go over the initial brain storming."

"I'm very proud of you son, I hope that I am invited to visit for Christmas day."

"Of course. We are having breakfast with the Weasly family, but I intend to be home in the afternoon. I will have the elves prepare a fine dinner for us. Should I have them make your favorite pie?"

"If you wish it, it makes no difference to me. I have a present for you two. You should go to her. I have a bad feeling; I can't imagine what it is like to deal with the rumor mill of Hogwarts." But he did know. Snape had dealt with his own hell, in his time in Hogwarts.

"you're lucky, it is so unkind, but one thing is for sure. "He smiled and continued "at midnight during the ball, I have a present for her; I'll show you on Christmas, till then, have a safe journey home if I don't see you before" Draco said, as he went to leave.

"You too son, take care of her, she needs you now more than she's needed anyone, ever." Said snape.

" I know, and what scares me more it that I need her too. Ive never needed anyone. Just cutting. That's all I've needed..but now I feel more when im with her, then anything I have ever felt. " he said as he walked out the door, and up to meet her in the great hall.


	12. Chapter 12

Hermione entered the great hall, alone, Feeling guilty for cutting, ashamed of passing out, and grateful for that break to be starting very soon. Luna was sitting at her house table and smiled and waved as Hermione made her way down to where Harry and Ginny were giggling about something.

"What's so funny? What did I miss?" she asked as she joined her friends

"Good morning Hermione, I was just telling Ginny that Ron is plotting to break you and Draco up on Christmas. He plans to corner you and make you kiss him. We were just making a bet on how bad Draco is going to rearrange his face" said harry, Ginny continuing with

"I wouldn't think too much about it, I'm going to tell my brother off, I heard about your fight yesterday, he's not too happy that you talked to him like that. My stupid brother has it in his head that he's a tough guy, and that a woman is meant to be in her place…well I know you, your too smart and too pretty for my brother, you have a great guy with Draco." She smiled as her brother walked into the hall. "talk of the pig"

As Ginny's eyes looked up to see who had entered the hall, Hermione felt small all of a sudden. She took a deep breath, waiting for him to sit down near them, but instead he sat with Neville and Dean at the other end of the table.

"Looks like he's going to avoid you till Christmas" said Harry

"Good" spoke Hermione, in a plain, flat tone; Ginny gave her a stern look.

'Are you alright Hun?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just had a rough morning. I'm still getting used to the idea of not going home. Anything good for breakfast?"

"Toast and eggs for me, harry is eating quiche, it's the day before break feast, you can have whatever you wish Hun." Said Ginny.

"Ok…a soft-boiled egg and tea sounds good to me…perhaps rye toast?." as she finished speaking, with in a blink of the eye her food had appeared. The egg sitting neatly in a silver egg cup, toast points shingled on a plate and her teapot wrapped snugly in a tea cozy of her own making. A small note on it reading:

_Thank you misses, _

_Although we do not like to accept your clothes for ourselves we have found use of them for service such as this. I am happy to serve misses, _

_happy holidays-_

_Snippsy-kitchen elf of Hogwarts School _

Hermione stashed the note quickly in her bag, before the others could read it. Picking up her demitasse spoon, she cracked the top of the egg open, the shell fell to the sides leaving a perfectly cooked egg inside. Trying the wandless, speechless magic Draco had started to explain to her. She concentrated on the salt and pepper sitting on the table. She thought "move" and to her surprise they did, ever so slightly they slide on the table. She continued this thought pattern until her little egg was nicely sprinkled with salt and pepper. Once the shakers were back on the table Ginny interrupted her thoughts

"How the hell did you do that? Wand-less magic is forbidden in school"

"No it's not Ginny, it just isn't taught." Spoke Draco, sitting down next to Hermione, at the table.

"Well it's still not safe, she shouldn't be doing it"

"And why not, I do it all the time." Draco said in his defense, Ginny giving him a taken back look.

"That type of magic puts too much strain on the body; she doesn't need the extra stress, not with the pressure of everything else. Practice it on holiday, and after graduation, not at breakfast. It's known as dark magic now-a-days, that's why I'm upset" she tried to say in a rational tone, but seemed more on edge then helpful.

"I know the risks, but it's something that is useful, Hermione, if you want to learn, I can talk to Severus and we can arrange lessons. Harry if you want your welcome to join." Spoke Draco.

"no I think ill pass on the lessons, Snape and I never really got along. Im sure he has his reasons for hateing me, but im not too worried, that and im sure Gin, would prefer I didn't learn."

"No I don't want you to learn, thanks." She said

Hermione sighed, and looked at her friends "I'm not sorry for wanting to learn. If I somehow loss my wand or if it breaks when im getting my stuff from my I won't try again in front of you. You know me, I'm not into dark magic" Draco looked a little shocked

"You shouldn't have to hide anything about yourself, it's not fair to you" he said

"yeah, you might not be into the dark magic, but given the past…" she was interrupted by Harry

"Ginny, stop, ok? Hes not dark, hes not his father, I know your concerned. And maybe I should be too. But I trust him. I thought you did too."

"I do…its just hard to get used to..I'm sorry guys" she said

"But if it is something that affects my friends, I'll do without. I'm good at doing without.

"Speaking of doing without, you should eat your egg, now that it's seasoned, Dumbledore is about to speak, might want to finish before that." Said harry, wiping his lips on a napkin, then turning to kiss Ginny. She turned away, and he settled for kissing her cheek.

A spark of pain hit Hermione in the heart; she couldn't do that with Draco, even with Ginny being mad at harry they could still kiss in public. Going public now would ruin everything. They needed more time, and the holiday gave it to them. Hermione's arm may have been healed, but it still hurt, and it flowed guilt through her every vein. Draco took her left hand under the table.

"Not now, people might see" she said, between bites of the little egg.

"oh, hell, let them see"

"No Draco, I'm not ready for that. I want the ball to be our coming out to the school."

With that, she put her spoon down, after eating only half of the egg, and a slice of toast. Hermione pulled out the catalogs, and a note pad and quill from her bag.

"We know the theme is a masked ball, but what type of mask?" she asked Draco, Ginny's interest being sparked by the word "ball".

"I'm not sure, I've always been a fan of the old French style, but that's an over the top kinda party."

"No ,I like them too, it's part of one of my favorite muggle plays,"

"Mask balls make me sad, you never know who you're dancing with, and when you find out, they are some ugly guy no one likes and smells bad." Ginny said,

"Well then let's start the theme around an old fashioned French masked ball. I think there should be a mask for each student, and that mask has a mate. During the ball, they find the person with the matching mask, and that is their partner for the night."

said Draco

Harry became interested and began to listen, then commented "can we have masks that are matched, if we are already a couple, and not looking for someone?"

"idk, I think that spoils the fun of it, but we only just started planning, we'll talk more on Christmas."

"sounds like a plan" said ginny

Just then the headmaster stood up from his breakfast, and called for the attention of the students.

"good morning to you all, we are almost ready to travel out into the wintery wonderland, and enjoy another holiday with family and friends. For those of you remaining here for holiday, please remember to sign in with your head of house or designated teacher each morning. You will be allowed to visit Hogsmade, but only with a pass, and only when weather permits." He paused and gave a small smile towards Hermione and Draco

"our head boy and girl have begun plans for a special treat for when we return from our holiday. From what I have been told so far, make plans to break in your dancing shoes, and I will tell you more after the break. Travel by train is still allowed for now, the storm has passed, but snow is covering upwards of 4 feet deep. Once you have your bags packed, and have signed out with your head of house please meet here by 8 am tomorrow." He paused and took a sip of tea.

"The rest of the afternoon should be used for final study before break, and to finish packing or tidying up. Enjoy your lunch feast and dinner feast, and if I am called away, happy Christmas to all of you."

The students went back to eating and talking, with thoughts of the joy this holiday will bring. Hermione thought of how awful it would be if she went home, she would have to face her father, but on the bright side Draco would be by her side, and she knew he wouldn't let anything happen to her. She was interrupted by a tiny school owl.

"Draco, the notes addressed to the head boy and girl." Said harry, handing the note to Hermione, and giving the owl a treat.

"what does it say Hermione?" asked Draco, giving Hermione a moment to read it over first

"I don't belive it.!"

"What? what's wrong?"

"No..it's not something wrong…. The ministry of magic has assigned a small wizard taskforce to my case for when I go to retrieve my things from my house. Here ill read you what it says:

… _due to the nature of your case, brought to the ministry's attention from an anon tip off, we do not feel that for your safety you should return to your residence alone. This taskforce will be available whenever you need them. I understand that this is a lot to understand, we feel that we, as the department that is meant to protect its citizens, has failed you. We hope that by continuing to keep you safe, we can redeem ourselves for any misgivings that might have been felt in the past. This is a time for new beginnings, and we hope to continue to do right by you. _

_Please enjoy your holiday_

_Department of Magical protection and law enforcement" _

"that's great Hermione, now you don't need to worry about a thing!" said Ginny, a little too happy for Hermione's likings.

"No…I'm still worried…now people know….and I didn't tell them. I'm not a lost cause. But I feel like I am." She sighed and looked at Draco, she was about to cry but held it back, her heart beginning to race and the need to cut rising as the blood flow passed over the mornings marks. Under the table she pulled the rubber band and it snapped. It landed on the mark that had been made only a few hours ago.

"Hermione are you ok?" asked Draco.

"yeah, I'm alright. Just trying to be ok. I don't feel like being here anymore, want to continue the ball planning in the common room?" she asked Draco.

"sure, Harry, Ginny do you have any plans? Want to join us?"

So The small group spent the remainder of the morning in the Heads common room. The conversation took them from topic to topic. Topics of music and food, and of decorations passed lightly over the hours. Draco and Harry started to argue over the music, Ginny sat there listening to each of their sides, as Hermione sat there and closed her eyes.


	13. Chapter 13

At first she was listening to them, but after a few moments found herself drifting off to sleep. The nap wasn't peaceful. The dream started with Hermione sitting on the train, alone. There wasn't any other student or staff on the train. She wasn't sure where it was headed, or coming from. But she heard a banging. At first it sounded like knocking, but as it got closer it was gunfire. Hermione stood up and turned around to see who it was. Before her eyes focused on who it was she felt a sharp pain in her stomach. Her hand went to the spot, and retracted when it felt moist, blood. She fell back against the nearest seat. And tried to take in a breath of air. It hurt, and felt like she was drowning in a hot liquid. The man stepped closer to her, and held the gun to her forehead.

"you ungrateful bitch, I raised you, fed you and clothed you, all I asked was for your love in return, no one else is allowed to touch you, I'll kill him for touching you. Since hes done who knows what your nothing to me. die you whore"….bang

Draco had stopped talking when Hermione started to twitch next to him, Ginny looked over "What's wrong with Hermione?" she got up worried, but Draco motioned for her to sit back down.

"She's having a nightmare, I should wake her up. I have to warn you, she's not going to be ok once I wake her. By the looks of her twitches it's a bad one. "

Draco bent down, "Hermione …sweetie?" he placed a hand on her .she shook awake, and looked around; he saw her hand go to her stomach, then back up. "What's wrong?"

"He...he...he shot me…because of your love for me" if anything else was said it was lost to sobbing, she kept her face in Draco's chest. "The next time I see him, I intend to kill him"

"You can't kill a muggle, not even him. My losing you to Azkaban isn't worth it. If I could I'd torture him myself. If only I could."

"The manor has a dungeon. It hasn't been used in some time that I know of, I've been there." He said making sure she was held close to him

She laughed and shook her head "no love, it's a pipe dream. I can't do that. Nor can you."

"We aren't travelling by train to the manor. I'll go arrange it by floo with the headmaster. If you're afraid of this happening, we will avoid the situation completely" he said standing.

Hermione grabbed his arm and pulled him back down to sit with her.

"Draco I can't hide from him, I've tried, trust me. it's not fair, eventually ill have to confront him. But right now I'm not ready. Over our holiday I intend to go to that house and retrieve the last of my things. Hopefully we don't have to have anything to do with him." She said

"There's nothing you need to worry about, I'll be there with you." Draco said, kissing the back of her hand.

"If you wish it we can come along as well, Draco I think you and I could clear the house, Gin and Hermione could go up and empty her room of her belongings. The guard from the ministry could cover the perimeter of the house." Harry said trying to comfort his friend.

Hermione thought of it for a moment "I think that might work. There is no way I can do this alone. But please don't let Ron know, he'll try to ruin the plan somehow." She said to Ginny, who nodded in response.

"My brother is an ass hat! He'll be silenced by my mother if he risks hurting you. My mother considers you one of her own. I wrote to her, and told her that he tried to pull some crap with you and that he is hurting your feelings. I told her that he started to yell at you, and if I hadn't stepped in he might have slapped you. Her response was that he was raised better than that, and if he does anything your not ok with, owl her right away, he has a place he can go to that does not include the burrow.

Clearing his throat harry stood up " I think it's time to go to bed, Ginny and I need to finish packing, and you could use some more sleep Hermione." He said kissing her forehead. "Sleep well hun, see you in the morning." With that Ginny and Harry left the room.

Draco walked them to the door "Harry, I have a question to ask you, we'll talk on Christmas day, please invite Mr. and Mrs. weasley to Christmas day dinner at the manor for me.'

"What is it about?" asked harry keeping his voice low.

"Worry not Harry, you'll know soon enough" Draco said reassuring.

With that they walked on into the hall way, and to the common room. Draco closed the door, and locked it for the night.

"Are you sure I'm not imposing on your holiday Draco? I don't want to put you out or be in your way" she said curling into a ball on the sofa.

"You're not in my way, or putting me out, I want you in my life, and I want to know that you're safe. Having you near to me will prove that to me" he said that siting down next to you, handing her a cup of tea, "here this will help you sleep. If you want I have a dreamless sleeping draft I could add. I have a supply of it from father. He knows how important it is to block the nightmares."

'I'd like that; it would be nice to get a night's sleep that doesn't involve him. I'd much rather it be you I'm dreaming of.' She kissed him, setting her mug on the table behind the sofa; she leaned in closer, at this point almost straddling him.

"Hermione if you want this we can, but I'm not going to do anything you aren't ready for." He said kissing her back and running his hand in her hair.

"I don't know, I thought I did, but I'm so confused." She said, sitting back on to the sofa. "I want to, but I'm afraid. Ever thing is telling me to do this but something is stopping me. You keep stopping me. Why?" she said, as if she was hurt by him not wanting to have sex.

"Hermione trust me, I want to, but not like this. I want you to be safe, and be happy. I know you are both those things at the moment, but you aren't ready for this. Once we have gotten you closure, moved out of that muggle home, we'll see." He took her hands in his and looked into her eyes "perhaps I want to be married to you first. Do something right for a change."

"Are you asking me? Right now?" she said her eyes going slightly wider and her heart rate increasing.

"No, I'm not; you'll know when I do. I intend to ask for your hand. But you'll know when I do." He said smiling.

"Again you need to be so wonderful all the time don't you?" she said curling up in his lap.

"I should go get you that potion; it needs a 30 minute window to start working." He said as he got up. And went to the bathroom.

Hermione sat there and stared into the flames of the fire. Knowing that Draco was in the other room she rolled up her sleeve. She pulled off the wrappings that covered her marks. Under the gauze lay the harsh reality of her life. That she was weak, and broken, and alone. But she wasn't alone, not anymore. She traced her raised scars with her fingers; they trembled as they caressed marks of her past.

Draco sat down next to her, his fingers came to meet hers, and they traced them with her. He then pulled up her hand and kissed it. "Your scars are a sign of how strong you are, not how weak. I love you for who and what you are. And no one will ever change that." Spoke Draco, and he poured a vial of red liquid into her tea. It smelled like cinnamon, and cloves.

"Do I need to sip it or drink the whole thing?" She asked blowing steam from the mug

"Sip it, once you start feeling tired you have 10 mins or so before the effect is full." He said running his hands through her hair.

"How did you know I like that, I love when people play with my hair. My mother used to brush it, and braid it before bed….but it's been years since that happened. Your gentle, you take your time with the snarls. I enjoy it." She leaned her head back after taking a few sips. He continued to play with her hair, and kissed her forehead.

They both sat there and took in the warmth of the fire and the radiating warmth and love that hung on the air around them for some time. Hermione finished the mug with the potion. Her eyes began to feel heavy. "I should go to bed Draco; I'm starting to feel sleepy."

She got up, and held onto his hand. He got up and followed her to her door. "I'll see you in the morning my love, ill wake you at 6:35, we need time to finish our end of term head duties before break." He said, leaning down to kiss her.

"See you in the morning then, thanks for the potion, let's hope it works. The draught from the hospital wing never worked." She said.

"That's not a strong enough dose; Severus makes this one special for me. He knows that it needs to be strong. If it's too strong tell me in the morning."

"Sure thing love" she kissed him back and he picked her up, he opened her door, and placed her on her bed.

"I'll see you in the morning" she rolled over and was out. Draco kissed her cheek, and she didn't stir.

"Finally, now get some rest, you deserve it"

Draco lit a candle, and put a fire proof hex on it. The flame lit up her little room, bathing it in crimson light, he closed the door going into his own room.

He took off his sweater and his button down. The mirror caught his skin and her stood there looking. His hand found his own scars. The dark magic marks of his neck, the slices that mapped his arms. His sculpted muscles of his arms and abs. his hair, long, blond and straight. "Why is it you love me….i'm nothing more than a monster."


	14. Chapter 14

Why is it you love me? I'm a monster." He said running his hand over the faded mark that once glowed with the brand of a death eater. His mind raced back to the night he received his mark

.

_His father was there, standing like he was so proud of his son and not the cruel man who was ashamed of him. His godfather stood by as well. With the powers of an open mind, Draco channeled a message to him "I don't want to hurt anyone father, please make him stop this madness"_

"_I can't stop this, son" thought Snape back to Draco. "When he asks you to kill the child, go through the motions, I'll say the incantation. Send green light at the person, I'll do the rest."_

"_Yes sir" he said as the dark lord entered, and seemed to be gliding over the floor with a child coming in behind him bound and gagged. _

"_This child is the outcome of magic and muggle. A Squib, the magic blood passing over this unworthy creature. She is worthless, and needs to be silenced."_

_The dark lord carried on, yet the words were lost to Draco, his eyes met those of the child and he saw himself reflected in the tears that flowed down her face. His thoughts were brought back when the icy hand of the dark lord came to his shoulder. "My boy, it is time you came into your purpose and showed your power with in my ranks. Please step up into the center of our circle. As you enter into the world of our purpose, be glad to be with friends and not in the realm of those who must suffer." The dark lord kicked the child forward, "now Draco, let her be silenced for good, and get her stench of anti-magic out of our lives for good!"_

"_Remember, green light, I'll do the rest." Thought Snape to Draco, who nodded and raided his wand. _

" _My lord, may I do it with speech less magic?" he asked bowing _

"_Why my boy, of course, showing off how pure your blood is with such advanced magic is always welcomed. Many here cannot even do it; you should teach us once you have finished her off."_

"_Yes sir" he said, re-raising his wand. "tonight you die" he said as he twisted his wand, and thought the spell for green light, at the same time he felt his godfathers mind link to his, as his wand landed in the last motion of the spell, the killing spell came through him but not from him. The girl was stunned by the spell, and fell onto the floor, lifeless. She lay there motionless, her last tears falling down her cheek and resting on the stuffed bear had hidden under her arm. _

Draco shook his head and came back into the room. He waved his wand, and his bags were out and packed. He lay onto his bed, his arms went up to rest under his head, and he crossed his ankles. "Your falling hard Draco, be careful"

Draco was unsure when he fell asleep but he sure knew when his alarm went off. The clock read 6:00am. He showered and went into the common room, in only his towel. Before Hermione woke up he wanted to have a tray of food ready.

After the tray was piled with food, he placed it on the table closest to the fire; he went back into his room and got dressed. Draco saw the clock read 6:30, close enough to when he was going to wake Hermione up. He decided to go and lay next to her.

When he opened the door, the candle he had left on for her burned in its fire proof bubble. He waved his hand and it went out. He lay down next to her, and pulled her close. He kissed her cheek. She started to stir, looking like she was opening her eyes from her restful slumber.

He quietly whispered "Ich möchte alle Wunden heilen und nie werde ich teil von ihrer seite" she smiled and opened her eyes turned to face him.

"You're lucky I know German" she said, leaning in to kiss him.

The kiss lasted longer than he first expected, Draco noticed her lips part slightly, and he took this moment to deepen, and share a stronger passion. She sighed into him, and he felt her press her weight against him.

"You're a good kisser" she said, taking a stretch and yawning. "I think this is the first time in a long while that I've woken up, and don't feel like cutting. Thanks for the potion"

"I'm sure Severus can brew us some more if you wish it. I'm already done in the bathroom if you need a shower, breakfast is ready in the common room, and your bags are packed. If you want your kit, you need to pack it. It's in the bathroom where you left it." He said, strong but not demanding.

"How did you know…" she said, her eyes widening with mild shock.

"Mines there too, and I left it there. If I feel I need to cut over the holiday, which I feel I won't need to do, I can always get a new blade."

"Then why give me the option, tell me to leave it here. Tell me you won't let me into the manor if I have it."

"I can't do that, I have no power over you. You are your own person, I can ask you to leave it, to come to me instead of cutting, but in the end it's your choice. Not mine." Draco said, in a reassuring and understanding tone. His voice made Hermione sigh; she was falling just as hard as he was.

"I'm not used to people asking me without it being a demand. I think I'll leave it here. If I need to cut, I'll come to you …unless you are busy then I'll go, I guess I could just go sit in my room." She said, her voice going small and her eyes looking at her feet.

"Or you could go sit in the library, or the garden, or by the pool, or one of the sitting rooms, or the music room, or the art studio. The manor is huge, and I promise you, if you come to me because you need to cut, I will do whatever you want to take it off your mind." He said , lifting her eyes to meet his. "You look down to no one; you're with one of most powerful wizarding families in the world. Trust me, you're almost a princess." He said. "Go get cleaned up love, I'll make sure the arrangements for our travel is all set."

"Ok, I won't be so long." She said as she grabbed her clothes from her dresser and hopped into the shower. Draco heard the water turn on, and he went into the common room.

He sent his patronus with a message to the headmaster, asking if they were still able to use the floo from his office. Soon a return message came with a simple answer, "For you two, anything"

The door to the bathroom opened and a clean, dressed Hermione stepped out. She was in jeans and a sweater, her small frame hidden under the bulkiness of the wool. Her jeans were tucked inside knee high black leather boots. She looked like she was ready to face the weather.

"What's for breakfast, I think I'm kind of hungry." She said, taking her place on the sofa next to Draco.

"You think? Shouldn't you know" he said his eyebrow raised, in a stern hard look.

"Nope…not really, I'm not used to feeling hungry; I've been ignoring it for some time now. I'm trying to get used to paying attention to my body. But it's strange." She shrugged it off.

"I had the elves send up toast with jam, and tea, I can have them send up a few eggs and a rasher of bacon if you would like.'

"Bacons far too heavy for me, it would never sit well, and eggs this early will make me sick too, toast is just fine and about all I can handle." She said, grabbing tea and toast.

"We can have lunch in the garden at the manor then, you should have some form of protein today" Draco said more rationally then caring.

"Won't the garden be covered in snow?" she asked, in between sips of tea, and bites of toast.

"You would think, but my mother never liked snow, and set a spell to always have spring on the grounds of the manor, it should have worn off when she passed, but the spell hasn't worn away. "

"Oh, how lovely…but I like snow; it makes every feeling go away. When the body can't feel anything it doesn't need to face what's being done to it…. Last Christmas holiday when I was home my father threatened to kill me, and started to chase after me. I ran and ran and ran. I was in yoga pants and a thermal tee. No shoes, no socks, nothing. He had come home early from the bar, and had caught me using the living room television for my yoga. Normally I would do it in my room, with a magical TV that harry gave me which ran off of water. But I don't have the space for some stretches in my room." She shrugged "I ran to the park about a mile from my house. There was a pond in the middle, but with 2 feet of snow covering everything I didn't know where it was. My feet were frozen from the snow and starting to bleed from the ice that sliced my feet. I guess I had gone too far off of the path…I noticed he stopped following me and I kept going. I have always been a fast runner. I used to go running when he was out of the house before he started to lock me in. I started to hear a cracking and felt the ground shift under me. I took a few more strides and found myself in the water. I thought I was going to die, at the time I thought it was for the better. Severus had seen me run from the house, he was coming to check in on me, and he got me from the water, dried me off, and took me back to his flat." She said shivering.

"I remember that day, he had, had plans with me for afternoon tea but told me not to come into the house, I heard him disapperated and then return. I didn't know it was you. I saw the blood, I thought it was from a death eater who had done something stupid" Draco said, sipping his tea, as Hermione did the same.

"No it was mine, he healed me up, and brought me home, and he rearranged my father's memory to forget about the day. I'm grateful that he did, I didn't need anything else against me for him to be mad about. But after that day, I realized that the cold could help me. that no matter what the cold blocks the pain. But I also could use it as a tool of pain. Ever heard of ice burns?" she said, not trying to smile but pain and happiness came as one in the same for Hermione.

"You mean it's so cold it burns? Yes. But I have never seen it done or know how to do it." He said, not asking her how, but saw in her eyes he was going to find out.

"Oh, well, it's really rather easy, coarse grain salt and ice. I used to extend the cuts pain by laying salt in the wound…"

Draco was shocked to hear this… "What? …Hermione…"

"Let me finish, after the salt I would press ice against the salt running it deeper into the wound. It would be a searing hot sensation like no other." she laughed and shook her head.

"I'm so fucked up…why is it you love me?" she said, a tear welling up in her eye.

"Because I'm just as messed up as you." He said. "I'm no saint either. Although, I never ice burned, but I do drink or rather I did. Fire-whisky, bourbon, wines anything I could get my hands on. I stopped drinking heavily after I almost slept with a girl I didn't even know. That was when I knew I had a problem. That's how I got the sex god title. I would alter their memories to remember the best night of their lives. I found no joy or pleasure from doing that. It ended up happening many nights, with many girls. All of which ended the same, I would take them to dinner, take her back to my room, and rearrange her memory. I'd have her sleep over, and shed wake up in the morning half dressed, with me next…they would fill in the blanks. I hated it but, it worked for me." he said, but then he continued with

"I really like to sit alone in the dark. I enjoy the solitude. I would spend hours outside, cutting in the darkness, sometimes so deep that I would pass out from blood loss before Severus would find me. He always knows when I'm in trouble, he knew what I did with the memories and the girls. But I didn't want to. I hated myself every time. Cutting helped. No one could hate me as much as I hated myself, at least I had Severus he's my saving grace ." Draco said grabbing Hermione's hand.

"I know the feeling; he would send me letters, or small presents" she smiled "he loves you Draco, you are truly his son. In his letters he writes about you." She said smiling.

Draco had a small tear forming in the corner of his eye. He knew that Severus was his father. He had taken care of him and loved him better than his own father had. But he never saw the side of him that was filled with pride and wanted to show off his accomplishments.

"He wrote to you about me? But why?" he asked

"He is proud of the man you have become. You're smart, and strong, and good at sports, and have a lot going for you. You grew-up under the hands of a monster, as did I. I think he wanted to show me that although broken and scared, I too could come to be something of worth in this world." She shrugged. " a concept I'm still fighting myself over." She looked at her watch "we should go; we don't want to be late for checking the students onto the train"

"Agreed, I'll come up and grab our bags before we head out to the manor. Got the exit list? "asked Draco grabbing his head student duty bag.

"I've got it right here. Let's go," she said kissing him, then heading for the door.

"I love you Hermione," he said placing a kiss on her lips before heading out to face the school.

"I love you too Draco." She said as she followed out of the common room.

Walking down to the front doors, Hermione was quiet. Draco knew that they needed to keep their relationship a secret, for the most part. But part of him wanted nothing more than to hold her hand. As they walked Hermione saw Ron walking down with his bags, wearing a smug look and holding the hand of a Gryffindor she didn't really know.

Hermione had gotten better in the past week or so at listening in on people's minds. She didn't do it often, but it came in handy when knowing what students were up to. And this was one of those times. She focused her mind, and found her way into Ron's mind.


	15. Chapter 15its almost Christmas!

A/N: Thank you for the lovely reviews, if I haven't personally responded to each of you, I am sorry. Please continue to read/review. I will be posting a Christmas chapter, and I intend to post a "gift" chapter for all of you lovely readers. Please be safe this holiday season, spend time with those you love, reflect on the good times, and the people and things that have blessed your being this year. Our time is short on this planet, we suffer from day to day, yet it is the people that help us along the way that are most needed to help us to love, and to laugh and to live.

Yours always, servant to the pen,

Mid-night kisses

And now onto the new chapter!

Hermione continued into Ron's head, but she regretted it as soon as she started to hear him.

"She's over there looking all needy, what more do I have to do so I can have at that…although I'm not one for used up seconds. It's like getting handy-me-downs but from a screwed up, desperate bitch." Hermione shook her head and took in a breath of air. She continued to set up for the check out. She didn't need to worry about Ron; she was stronger than anything he could say. She focused and listened in again

"….of course I could just continue shagging Heidi here she's only a 5th year, but she's got the body like I can't believe. I mean, Hermione is so thin, and she's got a great ass….but I'm sick every time I think of fucking her…who'd want to touch her after her father…yuck. Stop thinking of that…Heidi. Back to Heidi... She's so hot and I don't know what she sees in me… I must be a good lay or something" A smug look spreading across his face. "I know she wouldn't stop talking about the other night."

Hermione had heard enough. She knew he was an ass, but didn't know how awful he really was. And a 5th year? Yuck.

"Ready for break?" said Harry said pushing past Ron, knocking him into Heidi, who tripped over her heels and landed in a face plant.

"Watch it Harry, what the fuck?" said Ron as he grabbed for Heidi's hand and pulled her up.

"Ronny…..Tell your friend to say sorry...I hurt my face" she said pouting and whining.

"Sorry Ron, I didn't see you, Sorry Heidi, maybe you shouldn't wear 6 inch heels when it's snowing, but whatever" said Harry turning to Hermione to continue his good morning conversation with Hermione.

"Morning Hermione, did you sleep well?" said Harry ignoring Ron who was trying to talk to him.

Ron grabbed Harry's shoulder, turning him around "apologize to my girl, the right way. Now harry"

"No Ron, I bumped you, you knocked her over, now if you excuse me, I'm trying to talk here, I'll see you on the train" harry finished, turning back to the table where Draco had continued set up, and let Harry talk to Harry.

"Hopefully I haven't ruined your friendship with him Harry; he's your best mate. I don't want to get in the way." She said, putting her stack of papers on to the table, and setting out a quill and ink.

"Don't worry Hun, he's full of himself, and I don't know what he's up to, but I don't get a good feeling hanging out with him. He used to be like a brother to me… now it's just.. I don't know. The girl is always with him, and she is so mean to people, I'm surprised she's not in Slytherin, no offence Draco" he said putting his hand up to show he really didn't mean it, Draco nodded "Maybe it's how he's treating you, hopefully we can talk over the break." Harry finished, turning to see Ginny coming down the stairs, her red hair in braided pig tails, and her duffle over her shoulder. "Can I sign out and head to the train? Want to find a compartment without Ron in it; I'd rather not see him practically fucking that 5th year the whole train ride." She said with a disgusted look on her face.

"Sure things, just sign next to your name, and print where it is you will be staying over the holiday. Dumbledore wants us to give the heads of house a list of where students will be for the break, in case there is a need to contact them." Hermione said passing half the list to Draco, who was talking to a student from his house. "Here you go Draco, you've got your house and Ravenclaw, I'll take my house and Hufflepuff, seem fair?"

"Sure, I guess. Want me to make an announcement and get the students into lines? Make this go as fast as possible." He asked

"Listen up, quiet down! To make it easier and faster for all of you please get into two lines, Hufflepuff and Gryffindor with Hermione. And Slytherins and Ravenclaw with me." said Draco.

"Your all set harry, see you in a few days" she said hugging him before the line continued.

"Next?" she asked as the students made their way into line.

The checkout didn't take all that long. Most students were ready for break. Ron didn't say anything to Hermione as he signed his name on the sheet. Ginny gave her a quick hug, and joined Harry on the train. After about an hour all students were counted and waiting for the train to leave the station. Draco let out a sigh of relief as the doors closed, and they found her and Hermione were alone in the front room. He grabbed for her hand, and met it by her wrapping her fingers around his. "Are you ready for the break?"

"I'm ready for a lot of things Draco. But I'm not sure how I feel about everything that is planned." She said, as they walked up the stairs to the heads common room

"I know love, but we aren't going to let anything happen to you. I know you're scared. But you don't need to worry about it, we've got you covered." He said kissing her on the cheek.

She smiled and entered the common room. Her bags were packed and sitting near the door, same things as Draco's.

"Can I have a minuet or do we need to leave right away?" she asked

"No, we have plenty of time. We still need to go to the headmaster with the list, but we are leaving from his office so it's not a big deal." He said, sitting down, and stretching out on the couch

"I'll be right back' she said, going into the bathroom.

Hermione had felt sick all morning. Sharing he heart and her past with Draco was taking its toll on her. She was feeling so many things at once; she didn't know what to do. "What do I do …what do I do... I want to cut but I know I don't have to ...But will help" she thought to herself.

She decided to take out her box, and she sat on the floor. She was trying to be quiet, so Draco wouldn't hear her open her kit. She took out her blade, and rolled up her sleeve.

Seconds turned to minuets and for Hermione time stood still.

Draco knocked on the door "Hermione are you ok? You've been in there awhile" he said startling her, causing her to drop her blade, as it dropped it hit the floor and made a loud sound. "Hermione?" he said opening the door.

She was sitting on the floor, no new marks on her arms, but her kit open and the blade on the floor. "Love are you ok?" he said sitting down next to her, wrapping his arm around her

"Yeah...I'm fine…I thought I needed to cut...but when I went to I felt ashamed. I don't normally get like that. I just cut and I feel better. I didn't know I was in here more than a moment…you startled me...I'm sorry." She said, feeling ashamed, but it was confusing. She hadn't done anything but still she felt guilty.

"It's ok Hun. Don't be sorry. You didn't cut; I don't care if you have your kit out, or anything. You didn't do it. That's what's important. Sometimes I'll take my blade out, or play with my knife. I'll rub it against my skin. I'll play with the blade, but I won't cut. Just having it in my hand, feelings its weight makes the feeling back down. It doesn't make it go away but it does ease it a bit" he said, as she curled into his shoulder.

Hermione cried a little, feelings rushing over her. She couldn't take the awful things Ron had thought. "I've been practicing getting inside people's heads…. I overheard something this morning that isn't sitting well with Me." she said sitting up, wiping off her eyes.

"And what is that now? Who were you listening to…Ron?" she shook her head yes.

"He was thinking about me, and the things my father's done…and what he thinks you've done with me. Then he started talking about his actions with that 5th year. It's so disgusting. His mind is just like my fathers. It's dark and painful." She said getting up "let's get ready to go, thinking about his mind is making me cold" she helped Draco up, and they went into the common room.

"Let's sign out ourselves and bring our things to the headmaster." Draco looked at his watch "the elves will have lunch ready at noon; we still have a little time, so you'll be able to warm up by the fireplace in your room, or any other for that matter." He said, putting on his coat, and slinging his bags straps over his shoulder.

"I agree. And I get my own room?" she said, putting her bags on her own shoulder.

"Of course you get your own room, you could have your own wing if you really wanted" he started as they turned off the lights and locked the heads dorm for the holiday.

"Draco, that's too much. I'm sure I'll be fine with just one room." She said as they started toward the headmaster office.

Draco laughed then he continued the conversation "When I say your "room" I should really say your suit. There is nothing simple or small in the Malfoy Manor. Your room is on the same floor as mine, at the other end of the hall of the same wing. You have your own bathroom and sitting room, other than your bed chamber. There is also your wardrobe….well closet… it's huge as well." He said smiling. Knowing she was not used to such grander. He saw her face flush slightly, and could feel that she was very overwhelmed.

"Don't worry Hermione, you'll get used to the manor, now that I'm the master of the house I can make changes that I believe are needed. Also, if you're still interested in the halfway home for muggle-borns we will need all of the extra quest rooms." Said Draco

"Your right, I'm sorry Draco. I'm still getting used to the idea of being safe, and not trapped in that hell hole." She was suddenly cut off by Severus, who cleared his throat.

"It's nice to finally see you two together. It's time we saw you too happy." He said giving Hermione a hug, and putting his arm around Draco. "I will be able to be at the manor for Christmas, please have the elves fix me their delightful rhubarb and cherry tart. I do miss it. Your parents haven't had a Christmas gathering in some time." He said hugging them one last time.

"Christmas party?" asked Hermione?


	16. Chapter 16

Draco smiled and continued, "Well I will pass along the message to the head kitchen elf, she loves making tarts, I'm sure she will enjoy having them eaten by someone other than myself, and thank you father, I hadn't told Hermione about our Christmas day party yet." Spoke up Draco seeing Hermione start to grow nervous. "It's a small gathering of friends, Harry and Ginny, The Weasley family, Ron has not been invited. Severus. And a few others… don't worry dear; we will not be having a lot of people."

"No I should say not Hermione, Draco only wants to show your friends and those closest to you that you mean something to him, and that he wants to take care of you. I'm glad you two have one another, it's important to him." Said Severus, "I'll see you soon son, Hermione. Have a safe trip home." He finished and walked off to his office.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you Hun, but he's right. I want to prove it to your friends, and Mr. and Mrs. Weasley that I'm serious about you." He said and kissed her cheek.

"You know how I get with large groups. And thank you, I'm sure you've got everything planned out." She said grabbing for his hand again.

"Of course I have. Don't fret, small group, no idiots, just those that love you for the holiday, as it should be." Draco finished as they turned down the corridor with the head masters office.

They walked up the stairs to the office. Dumbledore was behind his desk "Welcome children." He said putting down his book, and taking off his glasses "ready for holiday?"

'Of course sir, who wouldn't be?" said Draco, pulling out the checkout sheets. "here are the lists for Christmas break. All the students that signed up for break are accounted for. Most will be at home, but we have several students going away with their families, they left the hotel or area they will be traveling." Draco said as Dumbledore took them.

"I'm not too excited for the break. But that's changing. I will be spending the break with Draco… if all goes as planned ill have to plans for the ball ready when we get back, as well as get my things from my muggle home. Draco has opened his home to me, otherwise. I..." She couldn't finish her sentence. Not in from of Dumbledore.

Draco, holding her hand, spoke up "Hermione would have been in a bad place with a bad point of view…things might have been hard for a lot of us if she returned to her muggle home."

" you always know what to say" she said thanking him.

Dumbledore stood, and smiled. "You two are some of the brightest students I have ever seen. And for both of you to overcome so much, I am so glad that you have gotten past all the bad. We should keep the past as the past. Some things should remain in the shadows of the dark broom closet. But know this children, some secrets don't like to remain hidden." He finished in his wise tone.

Draco must have noticed more than Hermione….but what secrets? What shadows? Draco brushed it off. "time to go hun, the elves will have lunch prepared for us soon"

"How lovely, here's your floo powder, be safe. Owl if anything comes up. And as always happy Christmas to you both." Said Dumbledore, walking them to the large fireplace in the back corner of the office.

"just say Malfoy manor east parlor, if you just say the manor, youll end up in the basement. Ok hun?" Draco told Hermione

"Can't we just go together?' she asked, grabbing her bags. " I don't want to screw it up.

Draco agreed, and they stepped in together. He took an extra large handful of floo powder, and in a flash the lights and smells of Hogwarts was washed away, and the warmth and glow of the manor can flooding in.

"welcome home master Draco. Welcome home miss. Snippy is most pleased to have you back in the house." Said a small elf, dressed in a small sun style dress.

" have all the details for the green room been taken care of?" Draco asked as they started to leave the parlor room, and Hermione was in awe.

The manor house was full of old furniture, it was beautiful and had a sad feeling about it. Hermione fallowed Draco as they walked past door after door. The walk through the house lead her up two flights of stairs and down a hall. Draco took a key out of his pocket and handed it to Hermione.

"this is your room. I want you to know that you are safe here. This space is yours, if you need or want anything changed all you need to go is ask your elf and she will take care of it." Said Draco, kissing her on her forehead.

" I don't know what to say…and an elf? Really ..I'm not a fan of how house elves are treated" she said as she turned the key, and opened the door.

"oh..my?' was all Draco heard as they stepped from the hallway into the grand green room. As they preceded into the room, there was a small table with four chairs, Hermione's school work, and ball planning papers already neatly placed with fresh quills and ink. Hermione looked around, taking in the massiveness of it all. The fireplace was in the main chamber, a large carved marble mantle held trinkets from all over the world, and a blazing fire already bathing the room in warmth. Above the fireplace was a massive mirror, framed in rich dark wood, brushed with gold. The bed in the chamber was a grand four-poster, drapery of heavy velvet in a green color that mimicked the walls. The bathroom was through her walk-in closet, the closet itself was already filled with the contents of her trunk, and several addition from street clothes to ball gowns, most with foreign price tags. The bathroom itself was rich cream colored marble with painted red roses. A large slipper tub was near a floor to celling window, and a grand steam shower was enclosed by frosted glass. A makeup vanity was a lighted mirror was tucked in the corner, its top neatly arranged with makeups and lotions and elixirs Hermione had no idea their intended use.

"I'm sorry it's such a small space" Draco said jokingly as they walked back into the main chamber, and took a seat in front of the fire.

"I guess it will have to do" said Hermione smiling playfully, Draco smiled to, and bent down to kiss her just then Hermione's stomach let out a massive growl. It was a loud low rumble echoing through her.

"I think you need to eat, would you like to eat here or down in the dining room?" Draco said standing up

"Here is fine, could start some more brain storming for the ball, I want to get as much done as possible." She said following Draco into the sitting room.

Draco snapped his fingers, and an elf appeared "Yes master Draco?" squeaked the elf

"Bring us our lunch here please, and fetch me a copy for the prophet." He said, Hermione assed a "please" before the elf popped away.

"you should try being nice, I really do hate how elves have been treated in the past." She said, opening a magazine with ball decorations in it.

"I normally am, but I want you safe and healthy" he said grabbing her hand, "and that means you needing to eat."

"I know. And I'm trying." The elf popped back into the room, with a large tray a sandwiches and soup. The sandwiches were fresh tomatoes, basil, mozzarella drizzled in olive oil. The soup was a turkey stew, with big chunks of vegetables.

Hermione looked at the food as it was placed in front of her.

"too heavy love?" asked Draco

'no…I love capresse sandwiches, and stew, I'm just not used to it. I need to get used to it, grand food. I don't want to disappoint you." She said, picking up her spoon, and starting to eat.

"you won't, as long as you try. it's all I want. You need to not give you give up and loose hope, im not going to be able to stand myself for letting you down." He said, starting to eat his food as well.

"this holiday is going to be full of wonders, I can feel it..i feel like something big is coming" she said

Draco nodded. Indeed this Christmas was going to be no one would soon forget.


	17. Christmas Chapterthe lost content

I'm deeply sorry that I was unable to post this for you all during the Christmas holiday... I was kept from my computer. This left me to use my type writer (yes I still have one, you try finding ink ribbons for it….not a commonly used item these days) now that I have my computer back and operational I have been able to transcribe the typed pages to the digital type. I hope that everyone has had a blessed Holiday and has started the New Year off right.

So here is my Christmas present to you , my loyal readers.

This chapter contains information that is only known by Severus Snape, and Albus Dumbledore. For

pleasantries, here is the "lost" chapter.

Without any more now. Severus Snape walked down the half frozen stone path that led to the train platform. He was still overjoyed that Hermione would be safe with Draco. It was a thought that warmed him. Hermione needed something good in her life. He reached the train, and boarded heading for the teachers compartment.

Like he expected there were few students in his way, and even less teachers. The way he liked it. Taking his seat, he pulled out a stack of letters. The holiday time was hard for him. When he was at Hogwarts he and Lily would spend most of the holiday together, Until she became the property of James Potter.

The letters he carried were from her, and Hermione.

"You know the words will never leave those pages" said Dumbledore sitting down opposite him.

"I want them to forever stay on those pages, so that I can recall her voice and remember her. I miss her. All the time Albus." Said Snape carefully refolding the letter he was reading, and putting it back in the pile.

"Are you going to tell her?" asked Albus, summoning a cup of tea for them both.

"I'm not sure. I am going to talk to Draco about it. But you and I both know who I need to talk to first. He needs to be there." Said snape looking strained.

" I don't know if he'll believe me. But I want to try; you set the spell, it needed both of us to tell her…she's gone….I don't know if it will work." Snape sipped his tea

"if he believes you, it will work. Do you want me there to talk to Harry?. We could bring him in here right now." Albus finished standing up.

Snape thought for a moment, it seemed longer than it really was, but he cleared his throat. "I think its time Albus, this Christmas I want to bring my baby home, at least let her know she was one filled with love."

Harry was sitting on the bench next to Ginny, they were sitting in a quiet compartment, listening to a radio. The door opened and Albus was standing there. "Harry, if you wouldn't mind I need to speak with you in the teachers car." Ginny's eyes went wide, and she spoke before harry.

"Can I come too, is that allowed?" she said, as they both stood up

"Not this time young lady. This is not my secret to tell, I need Harry alone." He said trying to be clear.

Harry nodded, and walked behind him to, stopping just inside the teacher's car. "Severus has a story to tell you. I know it as 100% truth. I know it will be complicated and difficult to understand but you will be at peace with it." Albus started to open the door, but harry interrupted.

"Sir, I don't understand?" his face wrinkled in a confused expression.

"You will, it will be clear, I'm certain of it." He said, walking into the room, Harry in tow.

They sat down after a quick hello to Severus, from Harry.

"Harry, there are a few things I need you to understand, first off. I lived next to your mother as a child. We wouldn't play or talk. But I would watch her from my yard. When I noticed her magical powers I introduced myself. She and I became friends. Your aunt not so much, she never liked me. I was weird and gross, it was a childish emotion, but it made it hard for Lily to hang out with me. we would sneak off to the forest of near our house. We built a tree house with magic. She asked me millions of questions. I was her first magical friend. When we started school, and got sorted things began to change. I was in one house and hers another. We tried remaining friends but it was too much. We reserved our social time to holidays. It got harder and harder to spend time with her. She began to grow up into a beautiful woman, and her life was beginning to not include me. Mine was bringing me down another path. In an opposite realm from hers" he paused for a moment to sip his tea, and he pulled out a few letters from his pack in his satchel.

"The summer before graduation she confronted me. This letter was written after that conversation."

_Dearest Severus, _

_I am so deeply sorry that I had to talk like that in front of James and Sirius. They think I'm secretly in love with you. Or you with me. But you and I know that is no secret. I have had feelings for you since we were children. You know that. But you also know that we can never be together. That both pains me and gives me hope. I want you to be happy, to love someone else the way you love me. I heard a rumor that James will ask for my hand before the spring term is out. I want you to know, I will say yes. If things were different, If we had both been in the same house….but things aren't different. They are the way they are. I want you to know that if I was ever in trouble, if you would allow me, I would go to you. Please know that I will be thinking of you from time to time. Please think of me. _

_All my love, _

_Your Flower. _

"you, and my mother were friends?" harry asked

"Of all of that you ask if we were friends?" he laughed a little "harry, your mother means everything to me. It's hard for me to look into your eyes...you do have.." 

"my mother's eyes, so I'm told. Why is that important?" harry said

"Severus needs you to listen carefully. The next part of the story is of the highest importance."

"Ok sir, I'm open for anything at this point…you knew my mother better than I did. "

"yes, I think I knew her better than most. After graduation James and Lily moved in together. They were happy on the outside. But lily wrote to me, her and James had problems. Right before they got married your father and her had a fight. I had always told her that my home was open to her, if she should need it. I hadn't spoken to her in about a year. During the time of the wedding I stayed away, I didn't want to be a problem. But I didn't have to, James had his own problems. One night I was sitting by the fire, reading the paper. And then your mother appeared before me. Her hair a mess and her eyes red and puffed from crying. It turned out that your father and her had gotten into a fight, he wasn't acting like a grown up, he wasn't helping around the house.. stupid things that had upset her, but he wouldn't own up to it. She didn't want to leave him, but on that night she didn't want to know him either. All of her friends were his as well, and if she went to them he would find out. She wanted to be hidden." As Severus continued the story his memory was drawn back to that night. His memory was in the past, and his thoughts and voice stayed with Harry and Albus in the present.

"_Sev I didn't know what else to do…where else to go." She sat, curled on the floor in a ball crying. Severus knelt on the floor, and put his arms around her. _

"_I have always been here for you, you know that" he whispered softly, brushing her hair away from her face. "When I said I was always there for you I meant it." As he said that, the mark tattooed on his arm began to burn. He tried to ignore the feeling but Lily noticed. _

"_Sev what's wrong? Are you alright?" she asked sitting up, _

"_He is calling for us…..but I don't have to go. It burns for all of us….Lily; I'm working for Dumbledore… I stopped being a death eater a few years ago, but it's not like I can stop the mark from burning or having to go to see him... He thinks I work for him." Lily's face wrinkled slightly across her brow, she took a breath and wiped her eyes. _

"_I don't know what to think Sev, I know you. I have always known you. You are a wonderful person. But why couldn't you have told me? we could…we…Severus.." lily didn't know how to say it. She had always had a place in her heart for him, but at that moment her actions spoke louder than her words. She put her arms around his neck and kissed him. She kissed him with a warm passion that had been bottled up for years. _

"_the next morning Lily woke up, in my arms. She had shared my bed that night. She kissed me and got out of bed. Getting dressed she sat down next to me. 'I need to go Sev. Last night….was…amazing. But I can't stay." _

"_your going back to him?" he asked trying not to sound hurt. _

"_I have to, he's going to be my husband." She gathered her things, and knelt down. " I will always remember last night, the night I shared with my best friend. Ill write, good bye Sev. "_

_She finished speaking and was gone. Leaving me alone in the room, still clinging to the scent lily had left in the air. _

_She had stayed true to her word and wrote to him, but it wasn't for about a month. _

_Sev, I need to see you, ill be over tonight, after James is asleep. Its urgent, I'm not in danger, but we need to talk - Lily_

"I wasn't sure what she had wanted but she sounded scared to me. Once she got to my place she told me. ..She was with child, and it was mine. She told me that night that I was her first, and that her and James hadn't even slept together yet. I didn't know what I was going to do… but I loved her but a child.. how…" Severus was cut off by harry.

"Are you telling me you're my dad…that is so not happening, Snape" he said getting up from his seat, starting to go on the defensive.

"No I'm not your father, I'm the father of your half-sister. But she doesn't know. Harry" he said putting his hands on Harrys shoulders, and looking him in the eye "I need you to help me tell her...I cant on my own"

"You're a strong wizard, sir, I'm sure you can handle it." Harry said, but then Dumbledore spoke up.

"Harry it isn't that simple. The magic surrounding your sister's birth has put a lot of things into play. I was the one that set the spell, so I am one of three that know the truth. The other two are her mother and father, the spell could be revealed if the child looked into both sets of eyes, as the truth was spoken." He finished and harry spoke without missing a beat

"But lily's gone. She'll never know….she won't be able to be told." His words were rational, and strong.

"That's where you come in. if you can say her name, and her relation to me. If you can say all that. You will play the biggest roll in the next stage of this. "

"Well who is she? Is she around?" harry asked looking confused

"Hermione" was all Dumbledore said. Harry's eyes went wide as the pieces of the puzzle came fell into place forming the whole picture.

Hermione was his half-sister, fathered by Severus Snape. ….her father hadn't touched her, the man that was her father was standing in front of him, wanting to make things right.

"Really?...I mean really? All I have to do is say it?" harry took a breath, and then continued.

"You Severus snape, is the true father and Lily Potter is the true mother of Hermione Granger" the air around them swirled in a fine mist. it smelled like lavender and vanilla. Harry knew that as Hermione's scent. "It's true"

Severus had tears falling softly from his eyes. He looked into Harry's eyes and saw lily's staring back.

"Knowing that you have her eyes will make it possible for her to know. You will not be able to tell Ginny, but please let her know that we need to talk to Hermione. I will owl Draco, the sooner she knows the sooner that vial man has no power over her." Snape finished speaking and did something Harry wasn't ready for. Severus hugged harry. His arms wrapped around the young man and to Harry's surprise his embrace was warm and comforting.

Dumbledore smiled. It had been a long time to since the old wizard had seen Severus happy. The last day this man had ever truly been happy was when he saw Lily hold held Hermione in her arms, from that moment on, Dumbledore knew that things were going to be different. It was in deed a time for change.


	18. Chapter 18

A few days passed with little excitement. The manor was a strong hold of comfort and bliss. Hermione spent most of her time on the floor of the library in front of the fire, piles of ball gown magazines and decoration catalogs. She had gotten a letter during breakfast that Ginny and Harry wanted to visit during lunch. The note had a message that said they had some important information to share with both of them.

"Knock, knock, hey Hun, what would you like for lunch love? I know Potter and Ginny are coming, do they have a favorite food?" said Draco, walking into the library, and he sat down in the chair next to her.

"Harry likes lamb stew, and Ginny has been trying this all vegan diet thing, no animal products, but she hates it. I think vegetarian lasagna is fine. She loves cheese. I don't know why she's trying this diet." Said Hermione, flipping pages of her magazine, taking notes on decorations. Sketching out a ball room floor, putting drapes and decorations throughout the room.

"Sounds like a great menu" he looked at her picture "ballroom looks great too, I can't wait to share that special night with you." He said, getting off of the chair, and sitting down on the floor next to Hermione. "What can I help with?" he asked opening a dress catalog; Hermione had put stars next to a few things. "When do you want to go dress robe shopping? Wait till after the holiday rush? I could call for the dress maker to come for a home visit. It is up to you after all. But you can have anything you want."

Hermione sat up "You're not buying me a dress, I have a small savings. I'll get a simple dress. You don't need to get me anything. You are letting me live here. What more could I want?" she said, kissing Draco on the cheek.

"Then why do you have stars next to these dresses? I think the green dress would look amazing on you. And that black one would fall just right along your back. You have an amazing body." He said, running his hand down along her body.

"Unless its long sleeved, I'm too marked. It won't look attractive at all. I don't want any pictures of you ruined by me being in them." She said, her body going ridged and tense.

"When will you learn to see how beautiful you are, your amazing. You don't need to change for anyone. I don't see your marks as a weakness. I see them as the ability you have to not harm anyone else." he pushed his button downs sleeves up, exposing his faded dark mark, and his own marks "You're not the only one with a demented past. But we don't live in that world anymore. We are safe now." He said, but Hermione's face said it all.

"But he's my father, that doesn't disgust you?" she said. Her voice shaky, and cracked, tears well on the way to falling down her face.

"It makes me angry that the man that was meant to protect and love you, turned, and betrayed your trust and abused that love. It's not how it's meant to be." He said getting up, and holding her close, as she climbed into his lap on the chair.

An elf popped into the room, carrying a silver tray with a letter on it. Hermione climbed off of his lap, and sat on the floor in front of him, leaning against his leg.

"Master Draco, a letter from Master Snape for you." The elf spoke presenting the letter, and bowing "has misses decided on a lunch food for today?" the elf asked as Draco opened and read the letter. The elf stood eye to eye with Hermione as she sat on the floor, this made the elf feel uncomfortable, as he tried to bow lower than her, but it wasn't working. The elf growing more and more frustrated, his round face

"Yes, please have a lamb stew and vegetarian lasagna ready. We will have two extra eating with us today." Asked Hermione gently.

"Make it three…Severus is coming. Please add a cheese and fruit plate." Spoke Draco, his nose hidden behind the letter, the elf said yes, and popped away.

"Oh…really? Is everything alright?" Hermione asked, slightly worried. Harry and Severus didn't always get along after all.

"Yes, him and harry need to talk to you." Draco put a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sure it's nothing to worry about. You know how Severus felt about his mother." At that Hermione smiled.

"I know. He's sent me a few letters over the years, which were from her. I don't know why, and I'm sure it doesn't matter, but he always told me it was important for me to know that many muggle born's have many problems. She was an amazing witch. I wish harry could have known her. It would have been nice to have a woman like her to talk to." Hermione

"Sounds to me like you know her." Said Draco, Hermione sitting down in front of him, as he started to play with her hair.

"I don't know her, I have an idea of what she might have been like. You know, for Harry's sake." She said, getting lost in the moment as he ran his fingers over her scalp.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were purring.' He laughed, then was shaken out of the moment by the clock in the hall. "Why don't you go get dressed love, than we can do our shopping?" "I told you I have no money, but I'll go with you, I like to window shop." She said softly.

"You have a spending account, you can get whatever you wish, put it on my tab, and it's paid at the end of the month.'

"Like a credit card?" she asked

"A what? Is that some sort of muggle thing?" Draco asked with a grin.

Hermione saw this and looked right back, "you silly ass you know just what it is" she put her arms around his neck, as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Well yes I do, however I like listening to you talk muggle, I know a fair bit about them from business dealings but I'm not perfect." He said

"The great Malfoy not being perfect oh the horror" she laughed. "I'm going to shower and get dressed. Shopping sounds fun I guess. I should write a list so not to forget anyone's Christmas gift." She walked out of the room, and headed into her own. The shower was already warming, and an outfit was laid out upon the bed. "house elves hear everything" she said to herself.

Draco heard the water turn on, he took this moment to send an owl. He picked up the magazine that Hermione had been looking at, made a copy and rolled it up, tying it with a note. He whistled for an owl, and a large black one came into the room. "Take this to the dress maker, now please" and the bird took off. After the owl left the room, he sat down near the fire. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. His mind was racing with what Severus could possible want to tell them. Sitting there listening to the fire Draco must have drifted off.

"You look peaceful, what were you dreaming about?" Hermione whispered into his ear, sitting next to him, he smiled as he woke up.

" I wasn't dreaming, I didn't even know I went to sleep. I just felt.."

"Comfortable?" Hermione finished

"Yeah, I guess my body needed a moment. All ready to go hun?" he said, standing up, running his hand through his hair, and straightening his clothes.

"Yup, I'm ready to go. I made a short list of what I want to get for everyone, or at least a list of who I want to get a gift for. If we have time I wouldn't mind looking at dresses, to get an idea of what I might make." She said following him out of the room, and down to the front door.

"why don't you just buy the dress, I keep telling you money means nothing to a Malfoy, and like it or not, your my girlfriend, and you want for nothing." Draco said coolly, helping her with her coat.

"Its going to be hard finding a dress, I need long sleeved and I'm not even sure what size I am anymore. I haven't been clothes shopping in a while. Baggy clothes work so no one starts to notice my weight loss. Although I'm not sure they don't notice." She said without too much emotion.

They continued to talk as they walked out the door, into a snow covered drive way. Hermione was surprised when a black town car was waiting out front. The driver stepped out and opened the door, revealing a larger car on the inside than out.

"It's only a 15 min drive, than we will apperate there. I don't like to pop in and out at the manor; I've read that it weakens wards, and I don't want my anti-muggle wards dropping, not with your father out there." Draco said as they slid into the back seat.

Hermione gave him a puzzling look "but I'm a muggle, why am I allowed in?"

"You came to the manor with me, and you're a witch, not a muggle. Regardless you have magic blood."


	19. Chapter 19

"My blood doesn't change Draco, but I get what you mean." She said

The remainder of the ride to the ride was smooth and quiet. Draco sat with his arm around Hermione, who was looking around at the trees and houses they passed.

"I didn't know Malfoy Manor was so close to my house. You go down that road, and it's about 15-20 mins away." She pointed to the road as it passed. "I won't lie; I'm scared to go there. I'd almost rather just leave what's there alone. It's not like I have a whole lot there anyway. A few books, some photos, a few gifts from Harry and Ginny. At this point I'm sure he's broken down the walls and burned everything. I just started to get used to the idea of not having to endure his abuse, going back there seems just silly." Although it was a strong topic Hermione had indeed gotten used to the fact that she was finding freedom. It was a slow process, but Draco was patient and caring. Yet, no matter what, she still feared that house, that place, and that man.

The car came to a stop at a phone booth, " We'll pop in from there" Draco said as he slide out of the car, and gave Hermione her hand. "Ready to go shopping?" she shook her head, and heard the driver close the door behind them.

Within a blink of an eye the phone booth was gone and the rows of shops came into clear view. It was busy, full of last minute Christmas shoppers and merchants. The sun was warm, but the air hung low with the smell of snow and a bold crispness.

"Where to first love? What's on your list?" Draco said as they started to walk on.

"I wanted to get Harry a pocket watch, and Ginny a dress for the ball. And I normally get Severus a small gift. But I'm not sure what he needs this year. He needed a new herb garden tool set, that's what I got him last year, but I've been so distracted I haven't been able to really talk to him." Hermione said as she took out her list.

"Well, I know a picture of us would be special for him. I know how happy he is we are together. And pictures are very special to him. He has always been sentimental for keeping photographs." Said Draco and he grabbed Hermione's hand and kisses it.

She pulled her hand back, "Draco I thought we weren't going to be public about us."

"I don't care what anyone thinks. Let the whispers start with a truth and not the words of a broken friend. I'd rather let the world see how much I love you than let Ronald start lies about us."

Hermione smiled and laced her fingers in his "Your right, I don't know what I'm afraid of. I'm so used to giving everyone else's happiness and forgetting about myself." She kissed his cheek as they came to the wizarding Jewelry and trinket store.

"Ready to go shopping?" Draco asked as he opened the door to the shop, hearing the bell on the door chime as they stepped out of the winter air, and into the warm showroom.

"Welcome Master Malfoy, and who is this Miss?" said the wizard in the shop.

"I'm Pleased to introduce you to Miss Hermione Granger" said Draco, the man's eyes going wide.

"Your part of Harry Potter's circle of friends, I must say, he must feel angry or betrayed that his girl is parading around on the arm of his school hood enemy."

Hermione took a step back, "it's not like that sir. Harry is my best friend, he has never been a love interest, and Draco and I wish to be discreet about this. Is that understood?" spoke Hermione, her voice strong and steady, an air of importance in her voice, Draco was very impressed, and it showed from his trademark smirk spread across his face.

"Yes miss, of course. Now what can I get for you? Are we looking for the lady?" he said looking at Draco.

"No sir, not today. Hermione is looking for a gift for Harry. I'll let her tell you what she's looking for." Said Draco as Hermione pointed into a case.

"Harry is interested in muggle machines. He loves gears and clockworks. I'd love to give him a pocket watch with exposed gears and a place for a few pictures. Do you have anything that fits that?" she asked.

The man thought a moment and went into the back room, taking a moment; he came back with a silver tray, a dozen watches laid out upon it.

"I think one of these will do. It's not like a wand, it doesn't choose you, you need to choose it. In my opinion" he said placing the tray on the counter, picking one up "this one is what I see in Mr. Potters pocket. It is large, but not showy, shows your gears and movements that you wanted, and has room for pictures. This one I have tried a new charm on it that has changing pictures. So he could carry multiple pictures instead on just one." He finished handing it to Hermione.

"it's beautiful." She said than she looked at the price tag….there was way too many numbers on such a tiny piece of paper. "I'd love to get this piece, but….its"

"Don't be silly, love. If you think it's perfect than it's great for Harry. Remember I don't care about the price." Chimed in Draco.

"But.."

"No, no buts. We'll take it. Please have it wrapped and ready for the photos by noon tomorrow, I'll have an elf come by to pick it up. Thank you sir. Hermione is that all?"

"No, I wanted to get a set of lily of the valley jewelry for Ginny"

"I have just the thing" the man said, going into the backroom again, returning with a necklace stand and box.

"This piece is preserved flowers. They are encased in gold. But that isn't the best of it. They are very special, I preserved them on the morning of the great marking. That is to say when harry got his scar."

Hermione held the beautiful necklace in her hand, the thought that this was made on the morning that Harry's mother died, was a very powerful feeling. But it also meant that this was very special.

"Until now I have shown no one what I have created. They were meant to be a present for Lily herself. If you are to give them to Ms. Ginny, I believe they are going to no one more suited for them. I am pleased to offer them to you." The man spoke, his voice shaken lightly but kept steady.

Draco took the jewels in his hand "Ginny will look lovely with this around her neck, have these wrapped and ready with the watch." He smiled as he placed the necklace back upon the stand. "Thank you sir. Hermione on to the next store? We have a time limit remember."

Hermione nodded and followed him out without a word. As they left the shop, the cold air took them by surprise. Hermione tried to wrap herself tighter in her cloak, but a shiver could not be masked. Draco spread his cloak and wrapped it around Hermione and himself. "Come here you, I don't want you catching cold now." He said

"But people will.." she started, too tight in his grasp to fight it.

"Let them see, it's too cold today. Where too next?" Draco asked

"I guess the Robe emporium. I need a gown for the ball, and if I could I'd love to get Ginny one too. I don't want to spend too much money." She said, enjoying being close to Draco. As they strolled to the next stop, few people noticed them. Hermione thought that it was a good thing. Less people to explain things too. As they entered the Robe store Draco paused a moment,

' I'm going to let you go and do the Girly thing, clothing shopping has never been my favorite, and my mother used to spend a lot of money and time here." Draco said, staying only just inside the door.

"oh, ok hun….i guess I can shop on my own. I'll only be a little bit, I'd love to get a gown for Ginny, and see if I see anything for myself. But I don't want tospend too much money love." She finished, Draco brushing a strand of hair in back of her ear.

" its already covered. The shop keeper knows you're coming. I sent your magazine to her before we left. Go inside. And pick something that makes you feel beautiful. Because no matter what, to me your beautiful in anything. Go on, I'll meet up with you in a little while" he said, kissing her cheek

Hermione walked into the shop, and was greeted at once by a young shop assistant. "ah, miss granger, master Draco alerted us of your interests, Mrs. Grey is working on pulling some gowns that will match the ones you selected. Would you come with me? we can fit you into a proper corset so the dress will fit perfectly." Said the assistant, her bright attitude showed in the bounce in her step. "My name is Brianna by the way, I know you from school, but I'm in Slytherin you wouldn't know me."

Hermione thought a moment "no I do know you, you were in my potions class in third year, we had to make the colored smoke and rain potions, we were able to brew them for multi colors, you were very sweet to me." Hermione said following her to the large dressing room.

"you look different Hermione, I've noticed your withdrawn from classes lately. Not being your friend I didn't want to ask, but I did owl Draco, he told me heads duty was stressing out, but just so you know, not every Slytherin hates you." Brianne smiled and grabbed a tape measure "let me measure your bust, waist and hips, so we can get a perfect fit, would you mind taking off your sweater?, your under shirt is fine " she said still smiling, waiting for Hermione to answer.

Hermione tensed up, she hadn't done a concealer charm, her scars and the new cuts were fully visible under her sweater. Hesitating for a moment, she took a deep breath in and took her sweater off. She stood there a moment in front of Brianna, and feared the worst. Brianna saw immediately what marks lay upon her, after a questioning look passed from her face, her smile came back, as if she saw nothing. "So Draco and you? How about that… I always thought he fancied you. "she started small talk to take away from being so close to Hermione, as she took the measurements she continued the small talk.

"we found we have more in common the we do different, once we got past the house difference things smoothed out. He sees me differently than most people. He doesn't seem to see me the way I see myself, he makes me want to be better. I feel better with him around. "Hermione smiled to herself, and was meet by Brianna's eyes, "he sees the beauty underneath, and I see a kindness in him that I haven't found in many others" she finished, as Brianna was finishing her notation of the size.

"you're lucky we carry a range of sizes, you are going to be in one of our smallest garments. But don't worry if Christmas treats put on a few pounds all of our items have a perfect fit charm, they will adapt to your body for whatever alteration might be needed." She said handing Hermione a corset, and a robe. "Try this one, and put on the robe, Mrs Gray is just pulling one more dress and she'll be with us."

Hermione said nothing, but pulled the curtain and put on the corset and robe. The corset fit just as she said, perfectly. Standing there with the floor length mirror Hermione took a few moments to look at herself. Her hair was shinny and smooth, the hair potions Draco had in the bathroom made her hair manageable and smooth. Her complexion had evened out. A few days of eating healthy fruits and vegetables, well eating anything at all, made her skin glow again. Her eyes didn't have as deep of dark under eye circles, her waist was tiny, and figure balanced from top to bottom. Despite the positives she still felt that there were more flaws. She put on the robe, thankful for the long sleeves since her skin was prickled by goosebumps. Pulling the curtain aside, she was greeted by two racks of dresses, in many colors and styles.

"I'm Mrs. Gray, sorry it took me so long, your selection of dresses is amazing, and I wanted to give you as many options as you deserve." She extended her hand to Hermione , who took it " this rack over here are the dresses that I believe match the lily necklace you have for Ms. Ginny, and the other is for yourself. Where do you want to start?"

" Let's pick one for Ginny, I'm no good at shopping for myself." Hermione said, starting to look through the dresses.

Hermione picked a golden red dress, a laced back bodice with a full skirt. Jewels and detailed embroidery could be found all over the dress. The dress was strapless, and she knew Ginny would look amazing in it. "this is it, she's going to love it"

"alrighty, Bri, please ring this one on the Malfoy tab, and have it sent to the manor.

Time for yourself than?"

"sure, are there any dresses with sleeves?" Hermione asked looking through the rack

"no hun, there isn't, you are beautiful, no matter what marks might be on your skin"


	20. Chapter 20

"Thank you miss, I bruise so easily…well.. My parents got a puppy; he scratched me I haven't healed right..." Hermione said, convincing no one, but the women did not question it. By gave a sad smile instead.

"What color would you like to wear?" asked Brianna

"I was looking at a ball gown like Cinderella's" said Hermione, the older witch gave her a strange look, and of course she doesn't know muggle fairy tales.

"It's a muggle fairy tale" Brianna said before Hermione had the chance.

"Oh, ok…like a princess? I have just the dress….ah…here it is" she said pulling a jade green dress from the rack, and placing it on the hook in the dressing room. "Try this on then, dearie."

Hermione went into the dressing room, pulled the curtain, and took in the splendor of the gown. Once she had it on, she needed help lacing the corset back, Brianna helped her "this dress fits you perfectly, not too many witches can wear this type of dress."

She turned to face the mirror, and found a girl she didn't know. The corset hung tight to her small frame, giving balance to her bust line and hips. The skirting was full and flowy, layered shades of the same green, pale and subtle, and mixed with silver gems and embellishments.

"Your jaw can come up off of the floor, you are that pretty." Said Mrs. Gray

Hermione gave a shy smile "I'm trying to see that."

"Want to try on another?" asked Brianna "do you have anything in mind?"

"Yes, I want to be in white. Everyone else will be in color, I want to stand out. It's an important night." She said going back into the room, putting the robe back on.

The two women went through the rack, finally taking a large dress bag from it. "This one was made for a special witch; she passed before she could wear it. I've wanted to sell it, but didn't have the heart to. You're a special witch Hermione, if it suits your liking, I would be honored if you wore it." Said Mrs. Gray.

She unzipped the bag, and the ivory dress spilled out. "Let me help you into it"

Hermione didn't protest. These witches didn't care what marks were on her skin, they saw no weakness, no pain, just Hermione as an individual.

"That dress is massive, and so beautiful." Said Hermione being helped into the gown.

"it's such a shame that she didn't get a chance to wear this. It was meant for a winter ball, much like the one you are planning. Her mask was a white peacock. I have the mask as well, it's yours should you want the dress." Mrs. Gray continued.

"who was the dress meant for? Mrs.?" Hermione asked, as the two women finished lacing the back, and fluffing the skirt.

"Take a look at it first, then I'll tell you who she was." The women said, her hands reading on Hermione's shoulders. "time to see yourself. Close your eyes, we'll lead you to the mirror." With that the three came from the dressing room.

Standing in front of the mirror Hermione's eyes were shut, Brianna and Mrs Gray spent a moment positioning the skirt and making sure every detail was in place. "Open them" was all Hermione heard, she wasn't sure who had spoken, the witch she saw in the mirror was not herself.

She wasn't thin, tall, and perfect, she was much more. She looked like an angel, layered full princess ball gown, tight fitting lace trimmed and satin bodice, a slight cap sleeve connected to above the elbow gloves, that buttoned at the wrist. White peacock feathers also layered the between the bodice and the skirts. This dress was more than clothes it was an event with in its self.

"Is that really me?" Hermione was having a hard time believe that the reflection was truly her own, her eyes didn't travel to her arms, which were covered by the gloves, instead to her eyes, to how the dress looked and fit. "Who was this dress meant for?" spoke Hermione only taking her eyes from the mirror to ask, then they went right back.

She met her own gaze more. 'why do you forget how beautiful you look?... 'Because he's destroyed you, made you a monster'… 'I am no monster'…. 'You're a fool then, who could anyone ever love you after what he's done? Really how could Draco ever think of touching you after your fathers been there" … 'Draco and I are real, and he loves me'… 'love you? How could anyone ever truly love you? Your blind, a foolish child, you deserve what you get, and once he finds you, and takes you back to that house….you know what you're in for…'Hermione thought to herself, agreeing with herself. It wasn't uncommon for her to think these things. After years of being ruled over by her father, Hermione often would have similar conversations about working hard in school, studying, wanting love, even the fact of deserving love caused her fight herself. "Enough!" She said out-loud, frightening the shop women.

"Dear are you alright? We can take you out of the dress if you don't like it." Said Brianna

After shaking her head "no, I'm fine, sorry. I love the dress. It's the one. This is perfect for the ball. No once will expect this from me….but you never answered me who was it meant for?"

"Mrs. Lily Potter, you remind me of her, in some ways. Being from the outside you treat the shop keepers differently, like we are kings of our own castles. Lily did the same thing. You muggles must treat everyone so kindly. I don't go into muggle London much so I wouldn't know" said Mrs. Gray, smiling. "She was an amazing witch, smart and pretty, much like you are Hermione, never forget how special you are. You beat the odds by being here, having magic in your blood doesn't just go to anyone, I never want you to feel below anyone." she finished, making a note on her clapboarded note pad.

"Lily's? really?...Harry is my best friend….this should go to Ginny, as a wedding dress…I can't take it…I wouldn't be right" Hermione said, feeling ashamed of how much she really wanted to keep it.

"Wouldn't be right?, Hermione you are the right hand of Harry Potter, I'm sure his mother would love for you to wear this dress. She was kind, smart and loving. You are like her. Honor your friend by wearing his mother's lost dress. After all, no one will know it was for her other than us here in this room. No one knew what costume she was to wear to the ball." She put her hand on her hip. "you will take it, and we will not argue that fact any longer."

Just then the bell of the shop chimed, "who's arguing? Not my Hermione now is she?"

He said stepping closer still to counter "has she found a gown for the ball yet?"

Before Hermione could answer Mrs. Gray did

"She has the dress she has wants, fits her, and suits her perfectly."

"But miss, if it belongs to…" she was cut off

"You dearie it belongs to only you. Now Draco, give me a moment, and ill messure you for matching dress robes." Said Mrs. Gray

"No need miss, they are the same as last month's suit, I'm sure your work will be perfect for the ball. I trust you completely." Draco said, than turned to Hermione. "why not change and head back home, we need to get ready for our guests, ill be right outside waiting for you there." He turned and left, and waited for Hermione just outside, looking at his pocket watch.

Hermione went back into the dressing room, and quickly changed from the gown.

"I'll have the dress sent to you once it's finished being pressed and final tailored. The mask and gloves will be with it, should I also send a pair of matching shoes?" asked Mrs. Gray.

"Sure miss, but please no more surprise's, you have done enough, and I don't know how deserving of it all I am." She said, coming back out, dressed ready for the cold winter air, pulling her cloak over her shoulders.

"Keep warm, and enjoy your ball. The dresses will be sent to the manor by tomorrow morning or sooner if we can manage it. Good day Hermione" both women said there good byes and Hermione met up with Draco outside.

"We should head back to the manor, there is little time before our guests should arrive, wouldn't want Severus and Harry starting a fight now would we?" Draco said, extending his arm for Hermione, as they popped out of the square, and outside the manor."

"Didn't want to take the car back?" she asked.

"would have taken too long, I wanted time for you to breath before lunch. Want to lay down?" he asked as they walked into the house.

"I need a glass of water, and to kiss you, that's what I need" she said wrapping her arms around his neck.

"oh a kiss really? Is that all you need?" he said smiling. "Well, let's have that kiss shall we?" he said, as he cupped the back of her head and kissed her lips. This kiss deepened in passion as Hermione found herself off of the floor and in his arms.

There moment lasted longer than a moment once Draco sat themselves onto a nearby couch. With Hermione on his lap he could feel her passion for him. She was his.

An elf came into the room, and sneezed to get their attention

"excuse the intrusion, Giffer would like to announce that the Potter boy and the Ginger girl are here sir, and that lunch is ready whenever you call for it sir" said the elf, before he bowed.

"bring them in gif, and bring snape right up once he arrives, we will take lunch in the Library, once our other guest has arrived you can tell the others to set it there." Spoke Draco, the elf nodded his head and left the room. Soon after Harry and Ginny came into the room.

"Hermione, its so good to see you." Ginny said rushing to her friend, throwing her arms around her. This took Hermione by surprise.

"its nice to see you too Gin, how are you harry?" she asked as Ginny let go, and harry took his turn to hug her. Draco was by Hermione's side, he shook Harrys hand and gave Ginny a small hug. At least they were trying, Hermione thought.

"Feeling alright Hermione?" asked harry, as they sat down around a coffee table.

"I'm adjusting. A few days won't fix the past few years, but it's a start. Having someone there for me, that understands is helping." She said as she took Draco's hand in hers.

"you know I'm always there to talk Hermione, I can handle it." Said Ginny, almost hurt that her friend hadn't come to her before.

"its not just someone to listen Ginny, if you walked in on me cutting, or if I had cut deeply and needed healing, I don't know if you could handle that. Its not something I want you to have to see or endure." Hermione was trying not to get emotional, she had been good about talking about this to Draco, but to her best friends, Hermione felt more ashamed the more she talked about it.

"you might want to let me decide what I can and cannot handle, but I get it, your trying to protect me. but maybe we want to be the ones to protect you Hermione, maybe once in a while someone should try to save you instead of you trying to save the world." Ginny was starting to get red in the ears, clearing this topic was causing her to get more flustered than she thought.

"Hermione, you and Draco are still coming for Christmas day right? Mr, and Mrs. Weasley are anticipating seeing you two, they send their best" said harry, seeing that the topic might start in a direction that might not need be gone down

"am I late for the party?" asked snape as he took his cloak off at the door to the room, and he walked in.

"Not at all Father, come on in." said Draco, who had gotten up to greet the new addition.

"lunch is in the library, want to follow me there?" he continued gesturing for the hallway.

The little group followed Draco up a flight of stairs and down a hallway.

"Damn man, could you house be any bigger?" asked Harry jokingly.

"it could, but that's what holiday homes are for. As it is, there are rooms I've never been in as of yet. Things not yet explored. Someday. If we still plan to open this as an estate for muggle borns." He said grabbing Hermione by the waist.

"that is a great idea Hermione, a safe place to go if the muggle family does not wish the child to study magic. An idea that might have saved a lot of muggle-borns in the past." Said Severus

"I don't get it though, cant muggle borns just stay at school?" asked Ginny

"No, only for short holidays, summer break they must go home. There is no students allowed for more than a few days. Us teachers have tried to get special permission for select students in the past, but it has never been approved by the board of governors" snape said, as they entered the library, the smells of lunch filling the room.

"let us eat, then Harry and I have a lot to talk about with you all" said snape, starting to pour wine in everyone's glass "let us toast, to a changing world, filled with new and old love, salute"

They clinked there glasses, and all took a slip, feeling the powers of the truth potion Severus had just given them.


	21. Chapter 21

After about 30 minutes everyone had eaten there fill, and conversed casually. Hermione had sat very still through half of the lunch, eating very little, but moving the food around on her plate. Draco noticed, but was talking Quidditch with harry. Severus and Ginny were talking about different types of plants, Severus offering his expert knowledge on some of the more exotic plants of that were brought up. Hermione having very little to add to the conversation, and feeling sick from the heaviness of the food, excused herself from the table and walked out of the room.

"Is she ok?" asked Snape

" Hermione is still adjusting, I'll go check on her, give me a few minutes and ill bring her back with me." said harry, getting up from the table.

The small group continued talking, as Harry made his way from the library, he heard Hermione crying. He didn't know what to expect, but put on his bravest face as he turned the knob to The Green Room.

"Hermione? Are you all right? You left the table so fast….may I come in?" he said, as he made his way to the bathroom door.

"it's open" he almost didn't hear. Taking in a deep breath, he opened the door, and let it out seeing Hermione was only curled in the corner of the room, no blood that he could tell.

"I'm sorry Harry, I think the wine is making my head fuzzy…..it tastes off." She said, as harry sat next to her.

"I'm sure it's your body just adjusting to processing it, you've done a great deal of harm to yourself, Hun, you realize that? Don't you?" he said soft, taking her hand in his.

"I know, I know every moment of every day Harry. But what else was I to do? I live between two worlds; both have unsafe places for me, both have caused me so much pain. The only difference the world I came from doesn't want me, and the one I live in wants to cast out and protect me from the other. I know you never knew your parents, but they died loving you. My parents…..they'll die fat, and alone wondering why no one is there to see them off." She put her head on Harrys shoulder "I wish I had parents that loved me. Not ones who left me alone, or abused their power. Just love, a home, a family, I wasn't ever meant for a family I guess." she finished talking, and sounding as if the words she had just spoken were draining her of her energy.

"I'm part of your, wizard world family, you have more people who love you then you might know and I'll always be here to protect you, just call for me, and I'll be there Hermione. I would never let anyone, even Draco hurt you. Your my….." just then harry started to cough, Hermione jumped up and got him a glass of water, once he had caught his breath again he continues "your my…best friend. Come let us talk with Snape, I think you need to hear what we have to say." Harry said, getting up, and extending his hand to Hermione.

"I feel sick, lunch was a bit too heavy. I think after we talk, I might need to lay down. I'm sorry if that cuts our visit short" she said as they left her room, and continued to the library.

"No, I think that's a great idea. After our chat, a nap might be more than perfect." He said as they entered the room. The Lunch table was gone; instead the large leather couches were back on their rugs near to the fire.

"Hermione, dear, please come sit here, in between Harry and I" Said snape, as they came to the circle of light from the fire. "Draco you can sit on the floor next to her, or on the other couch, it's really up to you, but Harry and I need the space closest to Her.'

Hermione was very confused, but did not question it.

'How should we do this?" asked harry

"I imagine just out with if….why sugar coat it?" Snape said

"Hermione, Severus and I have something very important to tell you." Harry started

"It's about your family" chimed in Snape

"Your parents to be exact" Harry continued

"oh no…has he found out where I am?" she asked in a panic, but the two men shook their heads.

"No, its has nothing to do with the man and woman named Granger." Said Snape. He pulled Harry down with him. And as he took her hand, harry took the other, now the three of them sat, bathed in warm afternoon firelight. Severus took a vial out of his pocket "this is truth draft, everyone has had a dose of it with lunch. I promise you, and we are under the effects of a very powerful draft, so you know we can't lie, we are speaking the truth."

"I know this is going to be hard to understand I only just found out myself a few days ago. But I know, our conversation as of now, will explain a lot about you." Said harry.

"first let me remind you of how much I loved Lily. She was my world. I had known her from a child, and say my childhood friend blossom. You know what happened at Hogwarts, different houses, different friends. Separate lives. Our friendship suffered. Or at least on the outside. We stayed in contact through the years, I told you how special her letters were to me." Snape said, as harry continued.

"the night before my parents were wed, my mother went to Snape, after fighting awful with James. That night…" harry paused and looked at Snape, who understood that harry couldn't tell this part of the story.

"Lily came to me, the only safe place to go, away from James, away from the world she knew. To escape. She loved James, but she also loved me. After a lot of fighting, and no one else to turn to, she came to me. I won't lie to you." He paused and laughed " well I guess I couldn't even if I wanted to, lily has been the only women I have ever loved. That night she shared my bed. Just one night with her…I won't be the old wizard in the pub who recalls old flames, but its a night I will never forget. For two reasons. That night I felt loved, no longer scared, or shy. It wasn't until a few weeks later that she came to me again. Bearing my child." snape finished.

"So, are you telling me that Harry is your son? But he looks just like James, is it a spell?" Hermione was confused, but harry continued.

"I asked the same thing, and no hun, Snape isn't my father, but he is the father of my half-sister." He finished, and took in a deep breath; they both looked into Hermione's eyes, as if by a spell, they could not move from the gaze. Hermione's heart was trembling like a little drum.

"Hermione Granger, you are not a muggle born, but the love child of Severus Snape, and Lily Evens." They both said as one. "Harry Potter's half-sister, and belong to our world by your birthright."

Hermione's eyes went wide, and then she fainted. This information was a game changer for sure.

"Well she asked if a nap would be alright after lunch, I wish she could have waited." Joked harry, as Draco picked her up, and brought her to her room, the small band followed, sitting down at her study table in the other room.

"I knew there was more to Lily and you, why didn't you tell me?" Draco asked Severus, as they placed Hermione on her bed, and covered her with a blanket.

"it wasn't possible, Dumbledore.." Snape started

"oh that man, why is it everything has to do with him?" asked Ginny, sounding very much like her mother, which made harry laugh to himself.

"Your all missing the point…Hermione has been living a false life, that man…that thing, is not her father. I will kill him, I promise you. For hurting her, he will die." Snape said, sitting down with the group

"what are we to do now?" asked Ginny "Hermione just found out a lot of information. …what I want to know, is harry is only 4 months younger than Hermione…. I know my birds and the bees….Snape could you enlighten us? Please?" she finished, as an elf brought a tray with tea a cookies.

"Sure, we went to Dumbledore, at the time, I was still double agent, if it were, so I trusted no other man. He knew that our child count not come to me, living with a death eater wasn't safe. Lily could never bring home a child that wasn't James's. We found a muggle family who had lost their child. Still-born. The wife went into a depression, and the husband seemed to drink. They understood what it meant to take this child. Dumbledore altered their memories so that the woman had given birth to twins, with only one still breathing. To have Hermione, we arranged for a weekend trip. Dumbledore worked a spell that allowed us to pass into the future, deliver the baby, and bring her back. It came at a great cost. For the child to know her birth parents she needed to be looking into the eyes of both parents. Mother and father."

Snape finished this part of his tale, and Ginny understood… "Harry ..Your eyes…that's how it worked?" she said.

"Yup, on the train, that's what Dumbledore wanted, to test if I was able to know. Once we found out I could know.." Harry was then cut off by Snape

"I could let my Baby know, that her father, her real father, loved her, and intends to see the man who has falsely been her father pay for what he has done." Snape have a tone that was sharp and very pointed. He was out for blood.

Draco sighed "we still don't know if it worked, yes she fainted, but it could also be a side effect of the spell not working." He said as he got up to stand next to the mantel, resting his elbow on the wood, then his head upon his arm… "I know you couldn't have told me this before….but I don't know if this news is good or bad for her. She thinks her father has been molesting her every night since she was 7! Her home life, if you can call it so, has been a prison. We already have uprooted her from that house, are trying to get her to eat, sleep, and not kill herself…and then you go and tell her that you gave her up to a monster? That you knew she was in pain…and did nothing! Am I the only one who sees that this might have just been the biggest setback to her healing" he finished without turning around.

The group continued in silence for a few moments. Until Ginny was too fidgety to sit any longer

"I'm going to lay next to her, even if I don't wake her up, my head is spinning from all of this, maybe dinner should be planed Draco, I don't think we will be leaving anytime soon. Sorry if that's a problem, but I think she needs us. all of us." she got out of her chair and started for the bedroom door, stopping, putting her hand on Snapes shoulder " give her some time, she already knows you care about her, but knowing that you are her father will need some getting used to." And with that she closed the door behind her.

Ginny kicked off her shoes near the rug by the end of Hermione's grand bed, Hermione had shifted since the boys laid her down, and Ginny could hear quiet sobbing.

"Hermione? I'm going to lay next to you, if that's ok. Like we do at my house, You know?" she said, in a quiet tone, getting into the bed. Hermione wiped her eyes, and flipped over to face her friend.

"does this change me, Gin?" she asked as a tear slid down her face over her nose. Ginny wiped it away.

"no, you're still you" she paused a moment and took an exaggerated look " yup, still you, still smart, still beautiful, still my best brined. Nothing could change that." She said wrapping her arm around her friend. She felt Hermione sobbing more.

Then quietly she heard Hermione whisper "I understand why I was given to the muggle family…but Snape…um…my father? He knew what was happening to me, or at least he knew I wasn't happy. Why did he let me stay there…why not tell me sooner?" Hermione was trying to wrap her head around it all.

"Severus didn't even know if he was able to tell you, while you were in here, he explained the magic surrounding your birth, from what I understood, when you were of age the plan was to tell you. But the spell needed you to be looking into both father, and your mothers eyes…" it clicked for Hermione

"so he needed to wait until the right moment to talk to harry? And if harry knew…then it would work on me?" she asked

"that's what I got out of it" Ginny said

"what does Draco think?"

"he's pretty upset with Snape to be honest, he thinks he should have claimed you years ago. He loves you, Draco. He wants to kill the muggle who's been hurting you. And he would do so, if you asked it of him."

"I don't think it's fair to kill such a man…he needs to suffer, yes, but a fast death is not suitable for him. Draco won't hurt him, I'll let the task-force deal with him, that's their job anyway. Draco's only job is to keep me safe, he already is doing that," Hermione said, sitting up, hugging her legs,

"So…you and I haven't had much gossip time lately…your always studying...so how is Draco taking care of you?" Ginny said with a smirk

"No gin, not like that. I mean….I've thought about it…but it's too soon…. I need to put the past behind me; but it's not easy, those feelings, having sexual feeling for someone, it doesn't seem right after being raped and abused. ….the thing that is torture should never bring pleasure…its complicated…what about you miss, I heard a rumor about you and harry sneaking off ?" Hermione said, trying to change to topic from her feelings to Ginny's, it works for the most part.

"some people cannot keep silent. Harry and I were just kissing one night alone In the common room. Ron came down, and you know how he gets so we stopped and tried talking to him. He was talking about this new girl he started talking to, and once he started to walk up stairs harry asked me if I wanted to go someplace private." She smiled "you already know it wasn't our first time, but harry still makes special nights…amazing, he had the room of requirement set up all romantic, roses, light music, chocolate, and omg the bed was divine. Your brother is something special."

"I remember a time when I used to say the same to you."

"Well no hun, my brother? He's an ass, you're with better. Ron took a trip last year, and after he came back hes been different."

"yeah I've noticed, but I figured It was him being a stubborn git. As much as I might have liked him years ago, he has a horrible personality, which is odd since you and I get along so well."

"never you worry, hes going to be sent away for Christmas morning, and we're all comeing here Christmas night."

"I guess I can tell everyone that night, I should go talk to Severus, and Draco. Its just strange…Gin would you give me a few mins, I want to wash my face….i'll be right out."

With that ginny left the room, as hermione went into the bathroom, locking the door.

Although she told Draco her kit was at school, part of it was in her toothbrush bag. enough supplies for one or two moments when the world was too much. This was one of those moments. She took out the blade, and the roll of gauze, setting it carfully on the sink. She looked into the mirror, and she saw bits of herself change. Her hair became slightly darker, but straighter, a slight body wave, her eyes, normally dark chocolate started to show specks of green, shading them in a mystic hazel color. as she looked carefully in the mirror, see noticed bits of snape, and lily looking back.

The reflection in the mirror was her own, but it was not powerful enough to stop her from marking. Taking in a breath of air, she placed the silver blade to her skin. She continued to do this, and her mind drifted away from her, until a knock on the door brought her back into reality.

"Hermione? You ok? You're taking a while.." said ginny, as she could hear Draco in the back ground

"What do you mean you let her in the bathroom alone? Are you crazy woman?", he went to open the door, Hermione looked down at her arm as she held it over the sink, the sight of the blood reminded her that she was dizzy. She had made a lot of marks, and blood was flowing in a steady like fashion, Draco unlocked the door, and told Ginny not to enter "Mia?" he said, before he saw

"I…um.i'm" she was having trouble talking, but he saw the blood, he grabbed for a towel, wet it with warm water and placed it on her arm, sitting her down on the floor of the bathroom "I didn't mean to….I….I. I'm sorry Draco" she said, in a strained voice as she sat there, letting him bandage her up.

"Draco, if I had known she was going to cut I would have stayed out side the door or something, she told me she wanted to wash her face." Said ginny, helping Draco by handing him some first aid supplies.

"I didn't mean to lie to you, I didn't know if I was or wasn't….then I just kind of started to" she said "I feel really dizzy Draco, i…I cant see straight."

"you've lost a lot of blood. I was wondering what was taking you so long. You've been in her almost 20 minutes" he said as he poured hydrogen peroxide on her arm, then putting gauze around her arm. " im not mad at you,"

"you should be I'm mad at myself, what if I had cut something worst? I am trying love, but today? Is a day I couldn't help"

Draco went to heal her arm with magic, but Severus stopped him "Allow me, please." He knelt down "after all, my secret is the cause of this today" he said as he took out his wand and moved it slowly above her arm.


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: Happy Birthday Hermione! For celebration of our main lady here is the next chapter of Time for Change. I hope your summer was a good one, and that school isn't horrible.

Thank you for reading

Severus knelt down to attend to Hermione's arm.

"Severus, it's not that…..it's just..i didn't think I was ever really wanted." She paused as he finished the spell, she felt and watched as her open cuts came back together, the skin pink and raw, with thin white lines. They still stung, but were at least closed. "thank you. All I meant by not being wanted was that my mother would look at me…and start crying, as a child I was told that I was to be a twin, and my mother couldn't help but feel the loss of the other one. Yet I wanted to scream out, but your other baby is right here! I get it now, why It was that she stopped caring. It was too painful for her, I guess she didn't know or didn't care to know the pain I was enduring. I resented her, she would go off and drink and party with her girlfriends, or other guys I never knew, and he was left to care for me. I just don't get how she got past the memory spell. Shouldn't she think I'm her child?" She said as Severus helped her to her feet, still dizzy, but getting better.

"She should, but if someone asked about you or if someone said something that could have triggered the memory's more clearly, the spell could reverse itself. I think in your case, my child," he said putting a loving hand on her shoulder as they walked from the bathroom to the sitting room. "Her loss of her own child was too strong, you were a child to love and raise, but you were not and would never be her own child. Dumbledore and I did a horrible job at finding you a family. We thought about someone inside the order, but with lily and James both being in the order it would have been hard to keep such a secret."

"Can I have a glass of water?" asked Hermione, as she sat next to Draco, who both lovingly and protectively put his arm around her. She knelt her head on his shoulder

An elf popped into the room, a glass decanter of water, and a mess of cups, he left it on the table, poured a glass for Hermione and popped out.

Harry and Ginny were curled on the sofa opposite Hermione and Draco, Severus in a chair in the middle of the two

He laughed "it's a beautiful sight" Snape said, taking a sip of fire whiskey

"what is?" asked ginny

"you all, love, youth, beauty. Harry, it is great to see the love you share….your mother would have been very proud of the man you are…and Hermione, I am proud of the witch you have become, you have been lost from me for so long. I wish Lily could see you now. You remind me of her. Oh so very much. She was more of a fighter then you are, but you're strong when you need to show it. I am so very happy for you and Draco. He has needed someone by his side, to remind him what he's worth, and I think you've needed the same."

"I was turning into a darker man then I had wanted to, but since that night, only last week, although it seems likes months ago now, I feel worth something. I want to share all the beautiful things of the world with you, Hermione. I wake up every day only because I know you need me to."

"you both are very selfless people. Hopefully you two can be selfish and have each other."

The afternoon moved into early evening. Hermione was breathing shallow on Draco's shoulder, and Ginny was asleep as well, curls up her head on Harrys lap. The three men talked about many things that afternoon. But the one thing the all agreed on: The muggle man named Granger was going to pay. No one deserved a painful horrible death more than him, but who, and how was not decided. This night was not of redemption or of seeking justice, it was a night of simply being with one another.

"would anyone care to go for a walk in the garden? I can't stay still any longer, or I might go mad." Said Hermione as she stood up, and pulled on her sweater.

"sure love, that sounds lovely" Draco said as he got up as well

"I'll pass child, I need to leave, but ill see you tomorrow." Severus said as he walked over to Hermione. He took her hand and pulled her into a hug. This embrace was different for Hermione. She heard his heartbeat, and inhaled his sent. "I remember you."

"what do you mean?"

"your smell, I remember it, when I was little I didn't understand. But once…..the abuse started I wondered why he didn't smell like what I thought I had remembered." She said, her face pensive.

"like what?" he asked softly

"a mix of smoke and sage, and a sweet smell, like light flowers and honey. He always smelt of musk and cheap cologne." She explained with a flat tone but then she continued "I used to smell your smell in the park, or in my room. Sometimes it would smell like that on a package that came in the mail. But I didn't know where it came from."

"you were a baby when I last hugged you, really hugged you. I know that to be kind I have embraced you to show comfort or care, but you are always timid and it lasts only a moment. And yes, in public spaces I would try to look out for you, but only from a distance and only for a moment. To watch you grow until I could see you at many times I wanted to steal you away, and bring you home. But Dumbledore told me to wait." He said stepping back his arm still around her

"I have a lot to learn about you, My father. I'm sure there will come a time when I won't be so shy, be safe on your way home" she kissed his cheek, and Draco hugged him too.

Severus said his goodbyes to Harry and Ginny leaving the two couples to their afternoon in the garden.

As Severus walked out of the manor he raised his wand, a pink light floating up and settling on the manor, forming a heart with a padlock around it. A protective charm of his own design. Feeling more secure he apperated back to his flat. Once he had hung up his cloak and removed his shoes he walked into his study. His flat felt cold and void of warmth and love after spending the day with the young witches and wizards. He sat at his desk and took out a rather old looking key. The key opened a box that had a considerable amount of dust on its top. The box housed the only photographs Snape had of his small family. Dumbledore had allowed them to take pictures those three days they spent with one another. He removed the bound collection of photos "oh Lily, why did you have to leave us?" he said into the empty air, as he opened the book looking at the pictures of his family that he had not looked at in years.

The first moment Lily held Hermione, Severus peering down, the happiest he has ever been

The first time he, himself held the child

Him kissing lily with Hermione between them

And a few others

Other pictures followed these, pictures of Hermione growing up. All of them taken from a distance. One for every year until Hogwarts. Somehow Snape had gotten ahold of her muggle grade-school photographs. The ones he had of Hermione from Hogwarts broke his heart. He could see she smiled less, was always by herself when not with the trio, her eyes showing less sleep, and her body the result of less food. "now you know my child…..now you know." He whispered as he removed two letters from the back of the album. Each envelope had Lily's delicate handwriting one saying HERMIONE the other reading HARRY. "I promised you that they would one day know the truth…and they do…I wish it was you and not your words that were here for them today. Oh how I miss you my flower." He said as he blew out the candle and walked out of his study.


	23. Chapter 23

A/U: Happy Holidays my dear readers, I feel that I am always begging your forgiveness for the length you must endure between chapters. My schooling is near to completion, and I may have a solid job lined up for post-graduation. Thank you for continueing to read and enjoy my story. …more of me goes into each chapter then you might have thought.

Servent to the pen, yours-

The garden was enchanted to always be mid-spring. The snow fell but did not stick, nor did its cold hand hang in the air. The sun was warm upon their skin as birds sang in the foliage. Harry and Ginny sat cuddled on a tree swing, watching the sunset, as more snow started to fall. Draco had taken Hermione to the barn.

"Wait here," he said, pausing at the door " I have a present for you" he said as he made her wait in the middle of the riding arena. She closed her eyes, and after a few moments she heard one….two? horses coming near to her. She did not open her eyes until Draco told her to

" This is Night-Shade, she is yours. I remember a few years ago you kept talking about how much you missed those lessons you used to take before you came to Hogwarts, well now you don't have to miss it." He said handing her the reins.

Night-Shade was named perfectly; she was a medium draft style horse, with different shades of gray and black markings. She looked like a smoke cloud, and her well-oiled leathers sparkled as the sun grew lower in the sky.

"Draco…she's…beautiful. But it's been years since I rode." she said as ran her hands along her thick neck, admiring the dark leather of what looked like a brand new Aussy style stock saddle.

"Then get on, take it slow, I'll be on Shadow right next to you" he said as he mounted his white horse. Shadow looked strong, and mean, but he was a gentle brute that Draco rode with ease.

Hermione mounted Night-shade. The animal stood still as she climbed up, and didn't budge as she adjusted the stir-ups. She bent forward to pet her neck "now go easy on me little girl, it's been awhile" she playfully said, and she gently kicked in her heels and nudged the animal forward. She started at a soft walk, getting used to the gait of the creature.

Draco sat on Shadow, and watched as Hermione nudged Night-Shade and picked up the pace. He nudged his horse and came to a trot alongside her

They rode along a path that led them back to where Harry and Ginny were. They were talking and giggling.

"Hermione I didn't know you could ride, you hate heights." Harry said.

"I hate flying on a broom, or on creatures I can't see, this I love" she said, patting the horses shoulder .

"not me" said Ginny " I like pets that are smaller than I am. Horses are pretty to look at, but I'm not a fan."

"We are going to go get a change of clothes and let my parents know where we'll be for the night, I don't want them to worry." Said Ginny

"That's fine, we'll have the elves get something together for dinner while you're gone." Said Draco.

While they were talking Hermione and Night-Shade were doing figure-eights.

"I'll see you later guys, I want to see what this girl can do." Hermione said, as she nudged Night-shade, and they took off, at a fast trot and picking it up to a canter. There was a clear path behind the barn, Hermione didn't know where it led, but she breathed in the crisp cool winter air, and felt more alive than she had in years.

"Draco" harry said before he could fallow her " I am going to let Mr Weasley know about tomorrow. I think he should know what's going on. His family has been worried about Hermione for the past few years, perhaps another adult wizard should be with us, this man seems like the worst muggle alive" Harry said to Draco, hoping her understood.

"I get it harry, that's fine, just leave Ronald out of it. The last thing we need is him causing problems."

Draco finished talking, as they popped out of the garden, and Draco went off after Hermione. Both horses were happy to be running, and the couple enjoyed the early evening together.

"See, you look so happy up there, you two were meant to be with one another you know, you both have been on the backside of the cruelty of muggles." He said, slowing their pace as they walked alone a small stream.

Hermione looked at Draco, putting a hand on her animal's neck. "You mean, she was beaten?" she asked.

"Yes, she was almost dead when the muggle animal ward took custody of her. Her owner had stopped feeding her, and was taking a spiked rod to her when she tried to lay down. He wouldn't let her laydown, she wanted to die. I saw them taking her from the barn when I was riding my broom. I landed in the tree line and went to ask about her. They told me what was happening and that because of budget cut backs; they would have to euthanize her because they didn't have the money to rehabilitate her. I told them I lived in the estate nearby, and that I would take her in, heal her, house her, and take owner ship of her. They said they couldn't just give her away, but after some monetary negotiations we made a deal. She didn't want to live, didn't take food, wouldn't move. I almost gave upon her. Almost put her down myself to stop her pain. But I was leaving for Hogwarts in a week, and I wanted to make sure she was either safe or…. Well, that night I went out to the barn, and laid down next to her. And I told her that she had to get better, that there was a girl that needed her. That she too was used to a cruel owner. And that if she ate and got better shed get to meet her. I didn't think it would work but it did, she ate." Draco came closer to Hermione, and pet the sweet horse. " back then I didn't know how bad you had it at home, but I did know about your love of animals. Even before Severus had talked to me I was going to give her to you as a peace offering of sorts." He added softly

"How did you know? I hadn't told anyone, Severus suspected but he didn't even fully understand yet ." She said.

"I saw the bruises, and I could tell by how you acted. I didn't want to admit to myself that I might have feeling for you. But I saw a side of you, that I don't even think you saw. When you're used to the pain and the anger it's hard to feel worth anything in the world. I started to fall hard, and knew that you felt like that. Although it took me a while to admit it" Draco said, the two riders getting closer back to the barn.

"let's get these guys back, I'm sure Harry and Ginny will be back soon. And I don't think I can ever thank you enough." Hermione said as they dismounted outside the barn, pulling the reins over her horses head, and using it to follow Draco into the barn.

Like everything else, the barn of Malfoy manor was like the rest of the house, exceptional. Each stall was at least 25 foot by 25 foot, with a heavy wooden door and gilded latch. There was a separate bathroom, tack room and feed stall. Along with the hay loft and washing stall made this barn amazing.

"Draco, this place is beautiful." As she unhooked the bridle and removed the saddle, and elf popped in and took the leathers into the tack room, wiping it down with conditioning oil before helping Draco.

"My father hated it, but it was one of my mother's rare loves. My father liked to keep my mother happy, so he had this built. As beautiful as this place is, it has its share of horrible memories" he said as he handed Hermione a groom kit, and they got to work brushing, combing and picking the hooves.

"Every house has secrets that they don't want shared. We both know that." Said Hermione, smiling happily as he worked on her horse.

"That's true, but I don't want that anymore. I wish I could go back and erase all of it. I only care about the good memories that we are making now. I don't want to bother with anything from the past." He said, putting his brushes back into the groom kit, and placing it on a shelf.

Hermione finished soon after, enjoyed a long inhale with the scent of hay and horse " even if we erased the memories from the house, you'd have them in your heart, and there's not much room, I'm in there now." She said, walking next to him as he put his arm around her waist.

" lets go get cleaned up for dinner, its going to be a long night" said Draco.

After they both washed up from being with the horses, they met back in the library. Draco had already given the dinner orders to the house elves and was now sitting by the fire, a whiskey in one hand and a letter in the other.

The letter was from a muggle-born in the United States. In a small town in a state called New York.

"what do you have there?" asked Hermione, as she came to sit by him.

" Severus sent it to me. Dumbledore got this in the mail a week after the start of term. After Severus talked to the head master about your idea, he pulled this out. Here ill read it to you."

_Dear Hogwarts school, _

_I knew I was different, I have felt this power, magic I guess, run inside me for as long as I can remember. I am two grade reading and spelling levels ahead in my current school, and do not have many friends. My parents think I am sick, and have locked me in a hospital for those with mental issues thinking I might outgrow this part of my life. If you are real, if there was any way for me to leave this hospital and learn what it is I am…who I am I would gladly do so. _

_I do not have much money for tuition, but will volunteer, or work for the school in any way that is needed. I just want to feel normal. And with a family how doesn't believe I'm magic feels like they don't believe in me _

_Please oh please come and bring me to school!_

_Sincerely- Alexis Straten, age 11 _

" why didn't The school do anything before?" asked Hermione

" the school cant have the students stay all year long, even if they kept her for holidays she would need a home." Said Draco. " let us focus on getting you fully removed from your muggle prison before we take in another muggle-born. we might be able to have her start school in the spring."

" I think after tomorrow we can sit down with the headmaster, the Minister of Magic and our selves and discuss this further. I'm 1000% sure this is what I want to do. If I am live, I want to help other children so that they never have to endure or feel what I was forced to cope with." Hermione said as she held the letter in her hand.

Soon Harry and Ginny were back, and the four sat down to dinner. Hermione made them promise not to talk about the next day's plan until after dinner, she didn't know if she'd be able to eat if that was the conversation. They all knew that the next days plan of action was the only thing to left to be discussed that night, but for now they enjoyed a bowl of beer and barley stew, with multigrain rolls and pumpkin juice.


	24. Chapter 24

The troop of wizards and witches did not stay up too late. They relaxed after dinner, the boys playing chess and Hermione and Ginny working on the plans for the ball.

The girls seemed to have almost everything settled. The decorations were picked and the order form was filled out ready for the morning post. The next task at hand was the entertainment.

"Perhaps we could get a few bands, and they each can play a small set as to change up the music mix." Said Ginny

" I was thinking something more along the lines of an orchestra, and a few singers. Even an orchestra can play modern favorites but it keeps it classy. The point of the ball is to show that even if you don't understand something it doesn't mean you don't like it. Well…kinda." Hermione said as she smiled, and looked over at Draco as he captured on of Harrys knights.

"It's getting late Hermione, why don't we stop for the night and work on this after We..um.." Ginny didn't know what to call tomorrow.

"After I retrieve the last of my belongings maybe. And they have my father in chains." She sighed and rubbed her hand along her neck. " I'll be glad once this is over. I just want there to be no problems. I had almost forgotten about tomorrow." Draco had heard Hermione, and ended the game with Harry.

" Don't worry love, " he said as he put his arms around her "you have all of us here for you. And I will hurt anyone who tries to harm you that is my vow to you."

"Ginny and I will be right beside you, and I agree with Draco I will put a stop to anyone trying to hurt my sister." Said harry as he kissed her cheek.

"why don't we all try to get some sleep, moving a few boxes isn't the hard work, the stress of the day will be the real challenge." Said Draco.

The group agreed, Draco showed Ginny and Harry to a room right down from Hermione's. after they all said goodnight Draco fallowed Hermione into her room.

" would you like me to stay with you tonight love?' he asked as she gathered her pjs from her dresser.

"I didn't really plan on sleeping tonight. My mind is racing. I don't know if I can handle any of this." She said as she sunk into a chair. Draco sat down next to her.

"You'll be fine love, you have more people on your side then you know." He said as he rubbed her neck and shoulders, they were tight and she needed the stress to melt away.

"You don't have to do that love….but it does feel good" Hermione's breathing became more relaxed and controlled.

"before Harry went to bed he told me that Ron has been missing for most of the holiday. His parents have only seen him twice and he isn't at any of his known friends or family. I have a feeling that we will see him tomorrow"

"what do you mean?" Hermione asked as she turned to face Draco

" I have a feeling that he is planning something with your father. I cant be sure, but I feel like he's trying to get back at us. I just want you to know that if he tries anything I will disarm him by whatever means I have to." He said.

" then we face whatever is to happen. If he has decided that hurting me or whatever it is he is planning with my father then we face it. I just hope that it doesn't Hurt Ginny. I know my father has a gun, a few really. Ron doesn't know how to shoot but if he's been with him, for a week then perhaps hes tried to train him. But this is just speculation." She yawned and tried to hide it.

" I saw that, you need to rest. Go wash up ill be on the couch." Said Draco kissing her on the forehead.

"I won't be long" she said as she went into the bathroom. She wasn't sure if she wanted a full shower or just to wash her face. But the pulse and need to cut was tempting her. She took a deep breath and started the shower, she didn't want to cut, it wouldn't change how scared she felt, and it wouldn't change the fact that her once close friend could be plotting against her. She took a quick shower, feeling much better after the hot water washed away her day.

She dried herself with a plush towel and before dressing took a look in the mirror.

Being away from her father, and living with Draco even for this short period of time had changed her. Her hair had changed because of the spell being lifted, and her face slightly altered in its features. Her thin frame didn't have as many bruises anymore, her skin was pink and lively, a drastic change from the sickly shade she had come to be. Hip bones and ribs still protruded from under hers kin, but no longer looking sharp and painful. She had gained 5 pounds eating the food the elves made. But the weight suited her, and there was room for more. She knew another 30 pounds or so would bring her back to a more normal looking shape. She felt frail, but no longer ashamed of her body. She wrapped herself in the towel, its size compared to her was like wrapping in a blanket, And walked out of the bathroom leaving her clothes on the counter.

"Have a nice shower?" Draco asked as he turned to see her walking towards him "now whats this all about.?" He asked as he extended his arm to her pulling her onto the couch next to himself.

" I want you to see me"

" I do see you, I don't.."

She interrupted him " you haven't seen all of me, if you love me, then you love all of me, don't you want to know what I look like?" she asked

" Of course love, but it doesn't have to be tonight. I love you, and I want you. But your body is not the only thing I love, I love your mind and your soul. Your body is just part of the amazing package the makes up you." She took a deep breath.

" but I want you to look at me, ive never had anyone see all of me who loved me, my body is telling me that it wants you and that scares me…but I cant live afraid of things like this." She said, standing up and taking Draco with her. She walked into the bathroom with him in tow.

"if this is what you want then I can only indulge your needs. I would give you anything to make you happy." He said, and she stood in front of his, her hands on the top of her towel.

" I don't see someone worthy of love when I look in the mirror, I want to see what you see," she said as she lowered her towel, letting it fall to the floor. " why me?" she asked.

Draco did not speak, but boldly took a step toward her, she didtnt flinch away from him, he placed his hand on the small of her back and hugged her body to his "I know no girl likes to hear that they have put on weight but in your case its only making you look healthy. You are beautiful. And will in time learn to love yourself the way I love you." He traced is fingers along her neck and down her arm, then lightly along her hip. "there is a fire inside of me that you have ignited, and standing in-front of me like this sets the flames higher with desire and longing for you." he said, with his worlds smoldering with passion.

"I feel it too" she whispered, as his lips met hers, and the fire was spread between them. After a few moments his hands picked her up, and he brought her to the bed, never once stopping the kiss. He broke the kiss to take off his shirt, but stopped there and continued kissing her with all the passion and love that grew between them.

She sighed into him enjoying this new sensation, this was a kiss.

"Draco" she whispered " I want you"

This brought his attention from kissing her to protecting her, he didn't want to hurt her, but he also wanted this too.

"tonight? Right now? Are you sure?" he said pulling a blanket up over her still naked body.

" I want this, im not afraid anymore, tomorrow is the last time I will ever have to face him, and I would rather face him knowing that I can feel love from someone then fear what he was doing." She said feeling a new found freedom that both thrilled and frightened her.

" I love you" he said, returning to kissing her


	25. Chapter 25

The night sky sparkled with the twinkling of the stars. Hermione's bedroom was bathed in moonlight. Hermione lay, now dressed in a simple silk night gown, with her head on Draco's bare chest.

"You'll keep your promise? Tomorrow night?" she asked, yawning and hugging herself to him closer.

"Of course, love, if you still want to. I'm really sorry, but I cannot allow myself to make love to you before yo're free from your cage. Look at me." he said as he lifted her chin " I love you more than I have ever loved another being. I would kill to protect you and allow no harm to come to you." She kissed him and went back to laying her head down. " goodnight love, let's get some sleep."

The night faded from its blackened slumber to a sun-kissed morn. As the light danced into the room, the couple stirred.

"Draco" Hermione said as she started to wake him up "why are you in my bed?"

He yawned, stretched and sat up "what do you mean? You asked me to stay last, that's not all you asked for.."

He was interrupted "what do you mean? I took a shower, grabbed an aspirin to help with my headache and ….um…went to bed?" she stood up "I don't remember going to bed, what kind of aspirin do you have?" she asked as she walked into the bathroom, and looked into the medicine cabinet

"I didn't put aspirin in there, which one did you take?" he asked as he stood next to her

"this one, it looks like a muggle brand, I didn't check the label."

" Hermione this is cheap a sleeping pill, it didn't work for me. I suffered from sleep walking and… bad dreams…what do you remember about last night?" he asked

" Draco your scaring me…. what happened last night, and where are your clothes…" her face looked panicked and she fell down the wall, and came to a seat on the floor " what did we do last night. I dreamed we had…um" she looked down trying to figure it out with out saying it.

"No we didn't" he said, sitting down in front of her

"We didn't..but in my dream we" she started to say, but Draco cut her off.

"You asked me to, you nearly begged me, but I couldn't, you didn't seem…right. We did make-out. And you came out of the shower wearing nothing."

"You saw me naked?" she asked, her face tight and her body shaking.

"I saw the woman I love, all of her; I wrapped you in a blanket while we were making out as to keep myself from touching you. You're beautiful. And I love you." He said as he took her hands and helped her up.

"so we didn't…?"

"Again no, but you made me promise that we would try tonight. And if that's changed I'm ok with it. You know I would wait as long as you need." He .said as they walked to sit in front of her fireplace

"No I like that idea. Once I can close the door on this part of my life I want to enjoy my life. You know very well that i didn't plan on being here. It's like by some force of magic I have been given a second chance. After today, I never want to think of myself as a muddleborn, I never want to think about what he did to me, or the pain I've endured. I want to focus on loving life, loving you, and sharing our joy with muggleborns who need a safe place to live." She said staring into the fire.

"It's still early love, you can close your eyes if you want." Draco said as they curled up together. With his arm wrapped around her, he lightly stroked her hair, tucking a few strands behind her ear.

Hermione didn't say anything, instead she closed her eyes and Draco felt her breath become steady and soft. He summoned a blanket over to cover them both and he let his head fall back as he, himself, closed his eyes.

A light knocking on the door, sometime later, woke Draco and Hermione from their blissful slumber.

"Hey, Hermione are you up?" they heard Ginny ask in a hushed voice from behind the door.

"yeah, we're up, come on in" Hermione said as she quickly grabbed her robe from the back of a nearby chair.

"we?" Ginny asked as she walked into the room

"Hermione wasn't feeling well last night and I stayed to take care of her." Draco said, as he went to put on his shirt.

Ginny gave Hermione a hug, and raised an eyebrow "take care of you?" she said with a smirk.

"no Ginny, not like that. But maybe someday soon. " she said blushing

"well if you ladies don't mind I'm going to go get dressed, Hermione there is an outfit for you in the bathroom. Its unique and ill explain at breakfast. Come down when you're ready." Draco said as he kissed Hermione, A fully kiss with his free hand on the back of her neck.

Once Draco had left the room "Well that's a lot different from the kiss on the cheek or forehead he's normally doing. Are you sure nothing happened last night?" she said prying deeper.

"Now I didn't say nothing happened but I just said that we didn't do…well that." Hermione said walking into the bathroom.

"well, details please" Ginny said as she followed her.

"ok, fine, I took a sleeping pill by mistake that had some strange side effects." Hermione picked up her hairbrush, and continued " Draco told me what happened, but the pill I took made me not in control of my actions. I took a shower and came out in a towel, at some point I dropped my towel and Draco saw all of me. he picked me up, and we made-out. At some point Draco removed his shirt, and I guess I kept asking for more. But Draco wouldn't. he could tell I wasn't myself." She paused " we ended up falling asleep, me nude next to him, I woke up naked wrapped in a blanket in his arms. It scared me since I didn't remember, I ended up putting on a night gown at some point. After we talked a little bit just after sunrise we must have fallen back asleep until you knocked." She said, clipping her hair back, leaving some of her soft slight curls hanging down her neck. "what time is it anyway?"

"it's just after 9, why don't you get Dressed, Harry should be out of the shower now, and I'm sure Draco is finished getting ready too." Ginny turned and went into the sitting room.

" ill be right out" Hermione said, grabbing undergarments and shutting the bathroom door behind her,

The outfit that was left for her was simple but on a closer inspection it seemed more like armor. "ok Draco…what are you playing at?" the pants were black cargo pants, a hidden wand pocket and a few pockets for small vials of potions. The top was a under shirt that was made of a light weight chain like material and an over shirt the buttoned up, covering the other shirt.

" I feel like this is a bit much" Hermione thought to herself as she finished buttoning her shirt.

Once dressed she took a deep breath . " today will be just like water of a ducks back…..he cant hurt you now" she said to herself in the mirror. As she turned and walked out of the room.

Before going to meet the boys at breakfast, she remembered to grab her wand and a jacket.

The girls walked into the room and found that there were more bodies then they had expected.

"Ah here she is." Said Draco, getting up from his seat, grabbing her hand and leading her to a seat next to his " these men, and lady, are here from the ministry. They have been assigned to us for your protection and the arrest of the muggle. And Ronald if need be." He added,

"hello Miss Granger, I am.." he started but Hermione interrupted him.

"no not Granger, its Snape." She said

"What's Snape? I'm not late am i?" Severus said as he walked into the room, kissed Hermione's head, and took a seat across from them. "hello everyone, sorry I'm late I was scouting out the muggle house since it's on my way over" he said removing his cloak and gloves.

"You're not late, I was just correcting them, he addressed me as Granger. After finding out the truth, that is no longer my name now is it?" she said taking a sip of Pumpkin Juice.

"Forgive me miss, we were not informed. Anyway, we have been briefed by Master Malfoy, and were just starting to pick the best course of action." Said the one how looked more like a hit man then a protector.

"before we start, please everyone sit, the elves will be bringing more coffee and cakes any time now, and if you would like anything for breakfast that is not on the table please feel free to ask." Said Draco, pouring himself some coffee.

The elves popped into the room, with pitchers of coffee and pots of tea, plates of Danish and donuts. And a large fruit display with berries or all colors.

" So, back to business I guess, the goal is to remove personal belongings from her room. it is on the second floor. This will not take more than 15 or 20 minutes. If you" Draco pointed to the only female of the guard team " could assist Hermione and Ginny, the rest of us will focus our efforts into taking the muggle man into custody. He is to considered armed and dangerous. He has been known to have fire-arms muggle weapons". Draco finished and took a long sip of his coffee.

The girls were eating a bowl of fruit and sipping tea, and were listening as the conversation continued.

"We also have good reason to believe that Ronald Weasley is acting as an accomplice with the muggle man. He is also to be treated as if he was highly dangerous. Hermione has been abused physically and mentally by both men. Ron was verbally abusive toward her just before break started when she opened up to us. he is not being charged the same as the muggle but is going to be charged with endangerment. This of course is pending on what else happens today." Draco finished, and Severus spoke up next.

"Ronald is there, that's part of why I was late I was trying to see if he was home. Ron knew that today we would be gathering her things, they do not have any wards up so they will not know we are coming, Ron has it in his mind that Hermione cheated on him with Draco, and both men feel that Hermione belongs to them. I however think that Ron is being held captive and not plotting to harm my daughter. " he finished

"well whatever happens we must first clear and secure the house. Taking him into custody and straight to the ministry as instructed. Once we have left the house is yours to remove anything that is yours. When you leave the Auror who has remained with you will seal the building and put an anti-theft charm on it." He looked at his watch " if its alright with master Malfoy, my team will wait in the hall, allow you lot to finish your breakfast. If you excuse us" he said, leading his team out of the room

" well isn't her the charmer" said Ginny sarcastically

Hermione put down her fork and pushed the bowl of fruit away, her stomach was beginning to reject food. She had only eaten a small amount, but her nerves about the next few hours were beginning to be unbearable.

"finished love?" Draco asked, turning his attention to her.

" yes, ive eaten too much too fast. I need some air, ill be in the barn" she said as she got up and put on her jacket.

Hermione walked out of the room, and down the hallway toward the back doorway. Once outside she took a deep breath of the cool winter air, the cold settled her stomach. The walk to the barn was short and her horse perked up as soon as she came to the stall door.

"good morning beautiful," she said as she nuzzled Hermione. "Todays a big day for me, my abuser is going to be taken in for what hes done. I wonder if your human was ever made to pay for harming such a beautiful animal."

She went into the tack room and grabbed the brush kit.

Hermione hooked the large animal up to a groom lead, and took to brushing her smooth coat, the repetition of the movement settling her mind.

Back inside the manor Severus, Draco, Harry and Ginny were finishing there breakfast.

"I do not think it's a good idea for her to go, if they hurt her, id never forgive myself" said Severus sipping his tea.

"neither would I, but we don't have another choice" said harry, Draco stayed quiet

"maybe we do." Said Ginny

The men gave her a questioning look so she continued "what if someone who looked like Hermione went in, but she was safe and invisible, Harry?"

" even if we could it takes three months, we don't even have three hours" said harry

"oh you silly children, I have a supply of polyjuice ready at all times, you could have just said so" said Severus, pulling a few glass bottles from his pocket.

"sure, but you know Hermione would never allow it" said Draco, looking at his watch again. It was almost time to free his caged bird.


	26. Chapter 26

"She's not going to go for this I'm telling you, but we can ask. She's in the barn, let's go there before we argue about this any further" said Draco, getting up from the table and throwing on his jacket.

"I'll meet you lot out front, I plan to speak with our guards" said Severus, already standing and buttoning his cloak. " Draco, please give Hermione this for me, perhaps it will make things easier to handle today" he said handing him a sealed letter with Hermione's name on it, it was old, but never opened.

"I will, we won't be long" Draco said, putting the letter in his pocket.

"if you don't mind Draco, Ginny and I are going to talk with the guard as well, I don't want to make Hermione feel like she's being ganged up on." Harry said. All Draco could do was nod his head, then he too put on his cloak and found his way to the barn.

The letter in his hand felt heavier then it needed to be. Was this from lily? Could it really be? He stopped just outside the barn. From where he stood he could see Hermione, there was tears falling from her eyes, as she continued to comb out her large horses mane. After a moment of standing there Draco's feet started moving before he really thought about it.

"Hermione?" he spoke gently, not wanting to startle her or the horse

"Draco, my heart is racing." she took a deep breath, " I'm ready for this to be all over. We need to finish planning the ball and start working with the ministry and hiring staff for the muggle-born safe homes. And I can't face any of those things knowing that the man who wanted to do nothing more than control me, and cause me harm, is out in the world. I don't want him brought in for questioning. I want him dead." She put the comb in the bucket and looked at Draco. "I don't want anyone else to do it. I want it to be me. They can do the kiss, but then I will kill him, myself."

Hermione was scaring Draco, and "perhaps you should read this first. Severus brought it over, read it and then decide that to do." Draco said putting the brush bin back in the tack room.

Hermione opened the envelope, "it's from Lily"

My dearest Hermione,

I know you don't know me, and I will never get the chance to know you the way got to know your brother. If you are reading this, then you should already know that Harry James Potter is your half-brother. Also if you're reading this, you know who your father really is. Severus and I were childhood friends, and my first real love. It broke my heart that he and I drifted apart. He became darker, and started hanging around people who are now known Death eaters. Even knowing he was growing darker I still cared about him.

When James and I started dating, I couldn't even mention Severus as a friend. I fell in love with James and agreed to marry him. But James was always so careless, and only wanted to have fun and goof off, he took nothing seriously. We had a wedding to plan and he wasn't helping at all. Even after we got married he wasn't acting like we were married.

After a night of fighting with him I was so angry I left. The only place that I felt safe going was to Severus's house. He had always told me if I needed a safe place I could go.

He held me as I talked and cried for hours. Then a magical moment happened and we created you. That night I would never take back, I got to have an amazing moment with an amazing friend. When I found out that I was pregnant I was scared more than I ever had been before, until today. As I write this letter to you I fear for my life, the life of James and your brother. We are being hunted, by dark wizards, Wizards who your father is rumored to be a part of. But do not believe the rumors, he is a good man that much I know.

When the time comes I want you to love your father for the both of us. You will grow up away from our world, and I hope they treat you well. I regret not being able to raise you myself but I wasn't able to. I had an obligation to my husband.

I want you to know how deeply I love you. I think about you every day. Severus sends me pictures of you from the family you are with. I saw you once, at a park with your muggle family. Your light laugh brought a tear to my eye; I had to walk away pretending you weren't mine. Yet all I wanted to do was steal you away from them.

I hope this is not good bye, but if it is, I want you to live every day with a much love and joy as you possibly could. Live each day, learn as much about the magic in your world as possible. The magic can set you free.

Until we meet again, someday my beautiful girl

Your mother

Lily

"Are you alright Hermione?" asked Draco.

She sat there a moment, not moving on the hail bail. "It was a letter from my mother. She wrote it the night Voldemort went to Godric's Hollow. She wrote it right before she was murdered." She sighed, a tear slipping from her eye down upon her cheek "I just can't believe that after all this time, I have proof that she loved me, that in that last moments….she thought of me too. I never think of myself as worth very much. That if I was gone tomorrow very few would even care. I feel as if I am replaceable. There are other witches as smart as I am or smarter. I don't feel something overly special."

Draco shook his head "but you are that special, and you are that smart. No one can match you in our year, not even me. Your magic flows from you and your spell crafting is just beautiful. Of course she loved you, she just wasn't allowed to."

Hermione didn't say anything, she stood up and led her horse back into the stall, making sure a few extra oat treats were left for her. "I think for the first time im not really afraid of him. This letter, I know it sounds strange but it smells like her, I can feel her in the paper. I know magic doesn't always work the way it is intended to, but I feel as if there is more to this letter then just words." She said, throwing her cloak on as she started to lead herself and Draco out of the barn, and towards the front of the house.

"This might sound strange, but blow on the parchment. Some spells don't die when the caster does. Wizard wills have a spell that makes them appear before the people listed on the paper, this could have a hidden message for you or something." He grabbed her arm and stopped for from walking. "here" he said holding the letter in-front of her "blow on it as if you were putting out a candle"

She looked at the paper a moment, and started to blow on the paper; the words started to move around, and floated off of the paper. The words started to change form and color, Lily's image appeared above the paper and her lips began to move "my lovely Hermione, I'm so sorry I can't see the beautiful woman I know you are becoming. There is a vault at Gringotts that Severus and I started for you. I had the key, seeing as I don't know if I will live to see another day, I wanted to ensure that only you would be able to find the key." As the image spoke the word key, a large vault key appeared on the paper, its image becoming clearer until it jumped off of the page and hovered above it. The key had a lily flower charm on it. "Use the money in the vault as you see fit, and when the time comes tell the world who you are. Your brother will need all the love he can get, please don't let him lose sight of what is most important in this world….Family. Goodbye my love, until we meet again."

The image shifted back into a cloud of letters, and the words reformed on the page.

"Lily always was amazing with things transfigured." Said Severus, Draco and Hermione not realizing how long he had stood there. "I haven't heard her voice in so long. I'm glad she was able to hide your key, for yearns not I thought it was lost. And although I am name on the account the goblins wouldn't ever let me in without that key."

"I guess I'm more like her then I realized. We can go after Christmas to visit the bank. But she's right, family is important. And today is the last day I have to face my old life. Severus, I want him to pay, for everything he's don't to me. The kiss is not enough, his soul is a tattered and torn thing, black and cold, and he needs to have no life left in him for me to be able to move on. And I want to be the one to do it." She said standing rather proud.

Both men looked at her but Severus spoke first. "I do not want you to become a killer, it won't make you feel any better, what I have witnessed of situations like this, as long as you can watch whatever light is left in him, that will put your mind to rest. I will be the one to kill him if it must be done. I am after all your father, and I have just as much right to kill him for hurting you in such a way as you do for being the one who was hurt. But I will not see my child kill. Not even this worthless muggle. Your mother wouldn't have wanted it to be like that." He said with a tone which warned the end of the argument on that subject.

"let's go then, the longer we wait the harder this will be." Said Hermione giving a shiver as they came around to the front of the manor, meeting up with the rest of the group.

"all right then, have we figured out what the plan is?" asked the leader of the task force, growing irritated that this wasn't done yet.

"yes we have, Hermione and Draco are going to enter the house, Draco will be hidden from their sight. She is going to tell them that she is only going to remove her things, and has found a new place to live. She also needs to tell him that she knows the true about her parents. We know that Ronald is with him, so we can expect him to want to magically control her, Hermione make sure your wand is in that inside pocket, only you can reach into that pocket." Snape paused a moment as she did so. Then continued " if they put up a fight Draco will disarm Ronald and summon us into the house using a message patrounus. Is not summoned, we will enter the house after ten minutes time. I think this is the only way to handle this. And I think we should head out and finish this"

The small group all agreed, and they also decided that walking would be the easiest way to get there. The walk was less than fifteen minutes, and as a light snow fell on them as their feet carried them forward, Hermione felt her stomach flip and tighten. She felt like she was going to be sick. Draco could feel her go a bit ridged, and he clasped her hand a little bit tighter. "We are going to be fine love. Don't worry about it" he said, kissing the back of her shaking hand.

As they reached the end of the road Hermione's eyes fell on the house at near the end of the road. She stopped moving, she didn't mean to but, something inside her wouldn't let her feet move any closer to that house. "please stop a moment" she asked, as Draco spun around to face her. "I'm sorry…I haven't been here for a while, I just..I'm alright." She said starting to walk slowly forward.

They grew ever closer to the house, and soon stood right outside the muggle home. The curtains were drawn and didn't allow for any outsider to look in. " alright, are you folks ready to do this? When you're ready, we will await your call. Good luck miss Hermione, I hope you find what you need, we are here to arrest this muggle, and the young wizard is needed. Now if you need please only disarm or stun, anything stronger shouldn't be needed understand?" they all understood. And harry threw his invisibility cloak over Draco, and wished them luck. And they started up the walk, toward the house.


	27. Chapter 27

As Hermione reached the top of the stairs, she pulled her key out of her jacket pocket, and whispered "Draco?" he didn't speak but placed a hand on her back, once she felt his warmth she slid the key into the lock, and gave it a turn. At the same moment the door flew open and a hand grabbed her by the collar and dragged her inside, Draco had all he could do just to enter the house before the door was closed and locked.

"He was right, you were going to show up today." Said Mr. Granger, pushing her forward into the sitting room on the small house. "Ron my boy, our little witch has come home, do you have her surprise ready?" he called into the kitchen.

Ron came out of the kitchen carrying a steaming, horrible smelling cauldron. " well hello my dear, you look well, I guess a week of that ferrets dick in you would put some color on your cheeks wouldn't it?" he said as he put the cauldron on the table, in front of the chair where Hermione was perched. She was unbound, but being watched carefully.

"I'm sorry you feel that way Ronald, but no, I haven't been sleeping with him." As she finished her words, the muggle brought his hand down hard on her face causing her to crumple over onto the arm of the chair, there was a sure crack from somewhere in her jaw. From behind her, she could tell Draco had his wand at the ready, and as she sat back up on the chair, a tear of pain slipping out of her eye, which she brushed away before the men in the room, could see. She took a breath a felt her jaw stitching itself back together, and a reassuring hand from Draco on her shoulder. "Well I'm going to get right to the point of why I am here. I don't care what both of you have to say, but I want the rest of the things that belong to me, I will remove them from my bedroom and never see you again. So what was your plan with your poorly made draft of instant sleep?" she said, sitting back against Draco's hand.

"you pissed him off, be careful" Draco whispered.

The muggle man stood up, and stepped in front of Hermione, "well, I guess my bitch daughter has learned a thing or two in that fucked up school she goes too, but tell me this, do they teach you how to shut up? You have been a thorn in my side since the day we brought you home.." he was cut off when Hermione stood up.

"And that right there is one of the reasons why I'm here. Let me ask you this… who is my mother?" she asked her hand on top of the pocket with her wand. " you never knew her, but she was an amazing witch, and my father is a talented potions master, which is why I can tell what that horrible mess is, Ronald you never really had a flair for potions did you?" she knew she had drawn the line, and she felt it, a stunning charm had come from Ron, and she fell back, smacking her head on the edge of the coffee table on her way down to the floor.

"nice work there, can you fix her head, we want her asleep not dead, yet" he said stepping over her " I'm going out to the market, I'm out of scotch, I'll bring you back something extra strong, you did good, but remember she's mine, so heal her if you can I'll be back." He said, grabbing a jacket and keys, he left. car door slammed and the car start but it didn't seem to leave the drive way, however Ron didn't seem to notice.

"Oh bloody hell what do I do…what spell is for minor healing?" Ronald said as he came to kneel by Hermione. "Maybe I should just let you die, then he won't hurt you, and Malfoy can't take you from me." He said with his wand over her, a small pool of blood starting to appear under her head.

"You idiotic git, move out of the way." Said Draco, pushing Ron out of the way, and started the incantations to heal her head wound and stop the bleeding.

"Malfoy..how did you get in th..You've been here the whole time?" Ron said, showing sides of being scared.

"I would never have let her come here alone. I made sure Harry knew that when he told Arthur it would just be her, knowing you were listening from the window. You really aren't very careful you know." Draco said as he brushed the hair away from her face. "She's still unconscious. She might not wake up anytime soon, I need help. Ron you are the last person alive who has any right to help you, if you claim that you love her, why are you here?"

"I came here to try to get her away from you, I figured her father would, I don't know, give me permission to date her? Gods Draco what have I done, the reason she's like this, is me. I stunned her and she …" he paused and looked at Draco with fear in his eyes. A wand was in his face, and a jet of light hit him at the same time thick ropes came around his wrists and ankles.

"You thought wrong Ronald; she has always known this home as a place of pain, you are going to be sent home to your parents, unless the ministry sees you as an accomplice to his torture of this girl. Either way, she will never be yours." Draco finished as he cast a patronus, the image of lion came out, "I have Ron, Hermione is hurt, Ginny go get her things, I'm taking her back to the manor." …he looked at his patronus "well go tell them", and it roared and took off through the wall.

Within a moment Draco had Ron knocked out, he figured it would be easier to move him if he couldn't speak or move. "I'm going to bring you back to the manor now love, here we go" he said as he picked her up, and with a faint pop, left the muggle home and were standing on the front steps of Malfoy manor. "Pip!" he yelled as a house elf appeared opening the door, "make sure there is a hot bath in misses room, and please call a healing wizard from st. mangos, I want her to be checked. Thank you." He said as he carried her up to her room.

Back at the muggle house, Harry was dragging Ron out of the house, as Ginny broke open the charms in Hermione's room. She didn't take much, but she filled an enchanted bag full of the photos and books, and few clothes that were left in the room.

"I have everything Harry, the house is empty at this point, you can lock up the home, and we are done here." Ginny said leaving the front door open. The task force witch sealed the door, and put a protective charm on it.

"Why are you here Ronald? What the hell were you thinking?" she asked him, knowing that he couldn't speak, "mother is going to be pissed, you have no idea what you've done showing up here today." She finished and walked away.

Harry turned Ron over to the task force, who also had the muggle man in chains.

"We are heading to the court room, at this point we don't need Hermione, this man is going to die in a cell, hopefully we can figure out what to tell the muggle police about him. We could make it look like his car went into the lake" said the lead officer of the task group.

"no, this man hurt my girl, we have every right to snuff him out. I can't let you take him:" said Severus raising his wand. "I will dispose of his body in an area so it looks like an animal attack, he is not worth a fucking thing." He said, his wand flicking a fire like tip toward the muggle man.

"you knew the rules, he will face judgment, we have enough on him to lock him up for life." Said the man, taking a port key out of his pocket.

"he shouldn't be allowed a life, he is the reason my daughter wanted to kill herself, he should not be allowed a fair trial, this muggle is worthless" said Snape stepping closer still to the two men.

Harry walked over and put his hand on Snape's shoulder "I agree this man should face a horrible, painful death and not a peaceful loneliness of a jail cell, but she wouldn't want this, our mother wouldn't want you to do this Severus. Let's go and check on Hermione, then we can go and be active witness for his trial. But we are asking for the kiss, right there on the spot before he is allowed to leave the court room. Does that sound fair to everyone?" he asked, the men nodding their heads


	28. Chapter 28

Back at the manor Draco had bathed Hermione, getting the remaining blood from her hair, and her breathing was still stressed As he waved his wand over her and magically redressed he then picked her up and carried her into the bedroom; gently placing her head on the pillow as Ginny came into the room.

"Harry sent me to help, what's her status?" she asked sounding very much like a healer, it made Draco give a soft smile.

"Her breathing is soft, her eyes aren't moving, and her pulse is weak. She hasn't moved or twitched at all. I tried the reawakenment charm, but it didn't work. Her head wound was healed within a few moments of it happening but the shock on her body after the stunning charm must have compromised her body somehow, I know your training as a healer, is there anything you know that I don't?" he said, moving over to allow her to get a closer look at Hermione.

She looked small and weak on the bed. Her hair was combed and lay flat, still slightly damp along her pillow. Her body had never looked so fragile to Ginny, she had never seen her friend as weak or sick but as she looked down at her, it broke her heart. Ginny took out her want and held it over Hermione's head, she muttered a charm softly and a slight glowing light was bouncing between the wand and Hermione in short waves.

" she's alive, but she's unresponsive. We need a more advanced healer Draco, I've never woken someone from a coma like state before, it is easy enough for one with more skill." She said, moving Hermione's hair to better look at the back of her head " you did a good job healing her skull, I can tell that she hit hard, we are lucky you were with her, or she wouldn't have made it out of that house alive."

Draco stood when a knock was heard at the door, the healer was presented by an elf, and Draco led him into the room.

"Miss Weasley, it's nice to see you, is this girl in you care?" the healer asked, pulling his wand and an array of small potion bottles.

"Yes, she was hit by a stunning charm, and within moments after the charm she suffered a major head trauma. Draco healed the head wound, but couldn't get her to wake up. It's been about twenty minutes since the charm, and only a few moments after was the head wound. He's healed it well enough, her blood level is normal, and all vitals are present, weak but there. I'm not sure what to do. A magical coma isn't something we've covered yet." Ginny finished speaking, taking her place next to Draco allowing the healer more room to see Hermione.

He moved his wand the same way Ginny had done, his wand producing a greenish colored light. "Your correct Ginny, she is in a coma. But no need to worry, I can correct it." He said and muttered a quick charm. A glowing light passed from his wand into Hermione. The light was hovering just under her skin, and traveled up from her chest to her head, then pulsed back down stopping above her heart. It flashed gold, then red, then floated up out of her chest, and dissolved in a shower of glistening sparks settling all over her body. As soon as the last speck fell and touched her skin a soft sigh was heard in the silent room.

Draco went to the other side of the bed, grabbed her hand, and gently started to move the few strands of hair that had fallen across her face behind her ear "Hermione?" he asked in a strained whisper. "I'm here love, you're safe" he sat down on the bed, taking care not to touch her body, but also did so without removing his hand from hers.

"Draco…what happened?" she said, so softly he almost couldn't hear her. He kissed her forehead, and helped her sit up as she continued to awaken from her state.

"What do you remember my love?" he asked, as the healer checked her vitals again to make sure she was alright.

"The last thing I remember was talking with him…and then Ronald…"her eyebrows crinkled in a displeased way "did he stun me?" she asked in disbelief.

"My brother is an idiot. I don't know what he thought would happen by helping that muggle get to you. He told me that he stunned you, and you fell back and hit your head on the coffee table, by all rights he could have killed you. If Draco wasn't there to heal your head you would have. My brother doesn't even know any simple healing spells. He's going to be charged with attacking you." She said sitting on the end of the bed.

Hermione sat up in the bed fully now. She took a deep breath and sighed "your parents must hate me, I'm ruining their family" she said to Ginny

"No, I popped home to let mum know what was going on. She told me to send her love, and to remind you that if he did attack you in any way that she's sorry she didn't raise him like that. My mum is more than pissed at him, I thought she would cry or scream but she didn't. She only asked how you were, you've been like a sister to me, and I've been in the dark for so long about this part of your life. But that's all over, they have him at the ministry, harry and Snape went with the taskforce to make sure he was locked up before the trial." She finished and looked at Draco "we should get Hermione there soon, the taskforce want this finished so they can enjoy the holiday you know; the one wizard was getting testy"

Draco helped Hermione to her feet "thank you sir, if her condition changes I'll send for you. Please leave a bill of service with one of the house elves on your way out. I can't thank you enough" he said as Hermione went to the wardrobe and started looking for something to wear for the trial.

"Anytime, Severus is an old friend, it's been wonderful to meet her. I am only sorry that it had to be like this. You've become a beautiful woman Hermione, I'm sure if lily were around she would be very proud of you."

Hermione seemed confused, how did this man know who she was. And as if he had read her thoughts he continued "oh don't worry, I was the healer who helped Severus and lily with your pregnancy, a tricky bit of magic Albus pulled there, and I normally wouldn't have done it, unmarried man with a woman carrying his baby married to his school age enemy….seemed like a muggle TV show, but I saw in them more love, for each other and for you even before they had met you." Hermione walked over and hugged the man.

"Thank you, I know you could have lost the ability to practice healing in the ministry found out, I only wish that they didn't have to send me away. but I understand why, I don't blame them." She said

"If you would like, I can stand witness for you my dear, the ministry has record of who you are, but after so many years the information is surely hidden deep I the department of mysteries, or at least it should have been. If any death eater had gotten hold of who your parents were, I'm sure only bad things would have come Severus's way." He said before he got to the door.

"Thank you sir, but that's not needed, the ministry won't need any witnesses to prove her birth, we have Severus for that. Thank you again, the elf will show you out." Draco said, at the same time an elf came into the room with a small tray of dried fruit and a bottle of water. She placed it on the table and bowed taking the old wizards hand as they left the room.

Hermione picked out a simple long sleeved tunic top, and jeans. "Thank you for cleaning me up, I don't know what I would have done if I had to clean blood out of my hair….it seems like a bad dream. That's easier to handle then really remembering it…and I'm okay with that. I'm going to change, I'll be right out" she said grabbing her clothes and walking towards the bathroom.

"Hermione, wait." Said Draco, but she stopped him

"I'm not going to cut, I've bleed enough today. I just want this over, im only changing. You can check my arms when I'm done." She said closing the door before he could follow or say anything else on the subject.

Hermione didn't feel the urge to cut, but felt a twinge of guilt that Draco had assumed she would, but it passed as fast as it had come. With her history with that action it wasn't Draco's fault that he thought she would. Hermione changed into her tunic and jeans, and took a moment to look in the mirror. She used a hair straightening potion, and her hair settled, straight and shiny framing her face. She put on a light coat of makeup, noticing how pale and sickly she looked. Once she was satisfied with how she looked, she went back into the bedroom. Harry and Severus had joined them, and were out in the sitting room in front of the fire.

"It started snowing again, I suggest we leave as soon as she's dressed and come back here. I can have the elves prepare dinner and we can be snowed in if you like. Harry you and Ginny are welcome at any time, I have enough space as you can see" Draco laughed.

"I'm ready" Hermione said walking into the room, she had knee high leather boots in hand, and a cloak over her arm. "Let's go watch the kiss of a lifetime." She gave an odd smile.

"Are you sure you're up for this? We can have him sent to Azkaban until you're ready." Severus asked placing a hand on her shoulder.

"No I'm ready, if I can't kill him myself; I want to be there when the kiss happens, if he has any soul left. If not perhaps some instant darkness powder and a misfired jinx might just do the trick." She said, giving another off color smile

"Hermione this isn't like you" said harry "are you sure you are all right?"

"Yes, I think for the first time since I found out I was a witch I am. I'm not a muggle born. I have strong magic in my blood. Its time I started to act like it. I'm not going all pureblood power crazy. But this muggle is not a friend to wizards, his life is meaningless. Not only that, but he took things from me that I can never get back. What type of monster could do that and be allowed to live? But alas he is muggle and human, I can't just kill him."

Draco looked at her "you surprise and thrill me with how much strength is in you. Come, let's get this over with, there is a port key on the table.

The small group didn't say much more about what Hermione had said, instead they silently got up, went to the portkey and as it began to glow they all felt the hooking feeling as it pulled them to the ministry of magic.

They all took a moment to get steady on their feet. Once the group was ready a ministry witch was waiting for them.

"My name is Sue Colt, I'll be the one representing you for the trial. You don't really need council but it was suggested to run all basic standards because of the nature of this trial. Just think of it a muggle vs. witch trial. Hasn't been one like this in" she thought for a moment " well I don't think I have ever seen a case like this" she said as she lead the way down to the court room.

Snape walked in front of Hermione, and talked in a hushed tone with Harry on the way to the trial. Hermione couldn't hear the words that they were saying but she could tell it was about what was going to happen in the court room.

"Don't worry Hun, I'll be there the whole time. And if anything happens Severus and I will act. That's what he is talking to Harry about. If the ruling says that he will walk free we are going to fill the room with instant darkness powder, and kill him. Of course it is only a backup plan we shouldn't need to do that" Draco said as he walked next to her with his fingers laced in her.

She walked with a slight shake to her knees. She was very nervous and wanted this to be over as soon as possible.

Hermione's mind drifted from her feet moving in front of her to what life was going to be like once this man, no monster, was going to pay for hurting her so badly. As her mind continued to float away she began to think of life with Draco. His family left him more money than he could possibly need. And now she too had a vault that had been sealed since last lily had entered it. Tomorrow we should she thought.

Before she knew it they were seated inside a dark old room. Ronald and Mr. Granger were sitting in the center of the room, their hands in chains. Upon hearing her name she was forced back into the room.

"What?" she asked not paying attention.

"I asked if you were alright to stand and testify against both men" asked an older wizard sitting in a judge's stand.

She stood up "I am sir. I am prepared to allow you to view the memories of what has happened to me. I'd rather not have to relive it by talking about it sir. You see this man" she says, pointing to the muggle. "This man has been violently abusing me by beating me, and forcing me to do things to him. As well as sexually abusing me. You want proof? Here's the proof" she said as she tossed a vial of silvery swirled liquid at the judge.

"You understand that we have to view these and test them to make sure they haven't been altered?" he said, handing it to the witch next to him, who opened the vial and waved her wand over it, nothing happened.

"These aren't fixed sir, they are as it happened. Shall we view them?" she asked as she tipped them into a penseve.

They watched as they stuck their faces into the bowl. Within moments the witch pulled her face back, and the judge soon after.

"Thank you for stepping forward Hermione, this man will never do these things to you again. All those in favor of a full sentence please raise your wands." He looked to the left and right of him. All those on the stand beside him had their wands raised. "So be it. This muggle will be given the kiss, and then executed by the wand." He said as the muggle man started to scream and struggle.

A dementor came into the room, and began to pull his soul out. "Hermione, you're free." Ginny said, giving Hermione's hand a reassuring squeeze.

"No, not yet. His soul is gone, but he still has a beating heart. It's not over until he is dead." She said, so coldly it scared Draco a bit, but it passed as she held his hand.

"It is almost over love, and then we can go for a nice long trail ride. The horses will love the new snow." Draco whispered to her.

The group left the room when all was said and done. Ronald was sent for a six month sentence in Azkaban. And the small groups were back in the manor drinking tea in the library.

"Harry and I are going to let you and Draco have a quiet evening, we have some last minute Christmas shopping to get done. We'll see you tomorrow night for dinner right?"

"of course, tell molly that we will be over by four" said Hermione, and her and Draco were curled under a blanket in front of the fire. She put her head on his chest and let out a peaceful sigh. This Christmas was going to very different.


End file.
